How would you interperate this?

"My Mom said that when I'm older, like a teenager, I can choose which house I want to go to any day I want. I can live with you every day or I can live with her every day and I don't have to go back and forth anymore if I don't want to."

 

sounds to me like a pick n choose type a thing. or just a BSWhy who is saying that if you don't mind me asking

 

My stepdaughter. I always have to be on the defensive with her Mother (it's been fed into the child that we're not her real family for almost four years now and has been known to bribe her with material objects so that she likes her Mother's house better), so I'm just trying to get other people's gut reaction to this - does it sounds innocent, like it came up in conversation somehow, or does it sounds like her Mother's trying to put it in her head that she "won't have to" visit us when she's older or even that maybe her Mother's trying to push her the other way (into spending more time at our house) when she's older (she's had more trouble "controlling" her lately)? I don't like surprises.

 

her mother can feed her all the info she wants; mentally wrong, But in the end who is the child going to resent.

Furthermore the child will benefit from you guys if absolutely nothing is said about her (mother) and she doesn't say "well mommy said this" What goes on HERE stays here!!

Money doesn't buy love . Love doesn't buy money either way . If you see anything wrong going on between any of the parents bf/ mom you have the right to anonymously call CPS

I have step daughters ones a teenager the other is 9 . I just sometimes feel like going on th eward.

 

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hmm yea sadly i think the poster above could be on to something

so this is your step daughter that you share custody of ??

 

She shouldn't have to go back and forth anymore if she doesn't want to. She shouldn't have had to in the first place.

 

I think that she is giving her choices around it, and that's a healthy thing to do.

 

So long as you let her know she's always welcome with you [I'm assuming she is] then she'll figure out what she wants to do for herself instead of going "back and forth".

My parents split when I was 12 and myself and my younger sister used to see our mum and her partner [I can't call him step-dad, it's weird] on weekends, however as we got older and started having more of a social life the amount of time we spent with our mum lessened. In the past few months though I've started taking the initiative and seeing my mum more often, just because I want to.

What I'm saying is even if she does get older and spends more time at her mother's that doesn't mean she won't come back round. If both parents have been in a kids life then they're gonna feel an attachment each way and will act upon that how they see fit.

Of course I could be horribly wrong.