So, last night I dreamed that I was in my old home town where I grew up. Which was somehow also my new home town where I currently live. [The locations and physical environments are totally different -- but there are a lot similarities between the 2 towns themselves] Any way, in the dream I was young again - late teens. It was late twilight and I was some where that my best friends dad was at -- maybe their house? He was an abusive drunk. Once or twice I ran afoul of him and incurred his drunken anger as a kid. In the dream I do something, or have done something, that sets him off at me. Then I am walking home just as the street lights are coming on, and a group of hoods-thugs encounter me. Seems like they are intent on pounding me for whatever it was I did to set my friends dad off. Though it is not clear if they are connected with him. And they are people from the neighborhood who are constantly hassling me any way. So, any reason is a good reason to get on my case -- like they really need one. And, there are about 5 - 6 of them and all bigger than me. [I grew up dealing with such situations] They force me to start walking with them to some secluded location to work me over. But I make a break for it and run off and a ditch them. [I was always fast. I could out run the guys on the track team and they hated it] It is total night now, and I find myself taking refuge in an unused house behind the local super market. I know it is owned by the market -- but unused, though fully furnished. Some of it's exterior walls are open -- sort of like a pavilion over a picnic table. So, I don't feel very hidden or safe there, as I know my pursuers are still searching for me. But it is what is available at the moment. Soon another guy shows up, about 30ish, and notices me there. He doesn't care. He's just some one looking for a free place to spend the night. I am relieved. Then I am found. The head hood steps out of the darkness and says that they know I'm there and I better come out, or they're coming in after me. Either way I'm toast. I have a German Lugar pistol in my right hand, and he knows it. But stands blatantly in the open, as if he believes me too wimpy to shoot. Then he turns his back to me and starts to walk away, back into the darkness, to await my next move. As he does, I take aim directly between his shoulders. I am worried about the legal troubles I might have if I shoot, but I am more concerned about self protection, and, feel this ass deserves it any way. In my head I imagine the gun going off and the bullet hitting him between the shoulder blades -- and I pull the trigger. Nothing but a click! Quickly, I drop the clip. It is full, I pop it back in. Cock the slide, so the there is a round in the chamber, aim and pull the trigger again. Nothing but a click! I check the safety, to be sure it is off. I aim, and pull the trigger again. Nothing but a click! I throw the Lugar down. In left hand is a very old six shooter. Just new enough to use bullets, instead of mini balls and black powder. I know that it is too old to have a safety, and that it is fully loaded, and does not need to be cocked. I switch it to my right hand and aim again. I pull the trigger. Nothing but a click! I throw it down and run off into the night. They pursue. But I am far enough ahead, and fast enough, that I keep out of their sight. Always a building, or something between us as I run through the darkened town. Yet they follow my every move. Suddenly I come to large body of water that I never knew was there. It is to big to see the other side. I assume it is a rather large lake. Even though I am a very poor swimmer, I plunge in and make for the other shore no matter how far off. Hoping that those chasing me will not know where I have gone, and loose my trail. But I am not sure of this. As I swim, more like struggle, I find that I am in the midst of a large group of others, also swimming for the other shore. As if just by chance, I have gotten mixed up in some kind of athletic, long distance, endurance swimming competition. I, and the others finally make the other shore, and occurs to me that the distance was so great, the body of water was probably more like a small sea, than a lake. This shore is some what tropical. There are shacks, etc, that are Hawaiianish, or Caribbeanish, and a lot of people, male and female. All sort of beach bum types, and all probably under 30. I am concerned if I have still been followed and sort of go up and down the beach looking out from shore to see if "they" are swimming after me, or coming by boat. I get the sense that they are. And may soon arrive. I get the impression that a good number these beach bum types on this shore are actually some kind of pirates. But this doesn't worry me. And, I wake up. This dream went on for a very long time, and was interrupted by several wakings. And, as soon as I fell back to sleep, it would resume right where I had left off. Even after once getting up and paying a visit to the bathroom. After arising, it stuck with me in my head, and it felt disquieting and uneasy -- and this feeling has lasted. So here I am asking what any of you might see in all of this.
Aaaarghh, matey. A pirate's life for me! Anybody who is looking for truth is going to run afoul of somebody who is doing their best to dodge it, especially if the truth-seeker points out the sotted dodger's ego-protective self-deceptions... As my first spirit guide Dani told me out loud once with red-rimmed eyes after I had mentally excoriated her for three days running, "We're always the ones who have to pay..." Where's that bottle of rum I was nursing...it's best to just get numb and blow it all off...pretend it isn't real and take our refuge behind "reason" and "logic"... LOL And it seems to be mostly the truth-dodgers, the oh-so-clever politicians, the calculating posers, the perception manipulators, who run the world and hold all the power...but this is just an illusion, it's just for the short term... What I've found so far is that there is a cost for seeking truth. Maybe that's what your dream is about.
Funny -- back when I drank [to excess], Rum WAS my favorite! Hah! Baccardi to be exact. Gold, or Silver. Well, shiver me timbers! Maybe I should have taken a mouthful of that sea I was swimming -- was it really water? And, I'm guessing those are MY ego-protective self-deceptions -- chasing me down. They also chased me from my current and earlier life's location and evnvironment, where I was sedate and comfortable, across the sea to another shore. A sea I didn't even know was there, and found only in attempting to save myself from harm. And, being a poor swimmer, would never have risked swimming, if not being motivated by threat, and feeling that the risk was out weighed by the threat. So, now I have crossed over to the other shore -- how spiritually symbolic -- and probably literal! And am amongst pirates -- who operate by their own alternative code. Outside of societies established rules and regs. And somehow they don't worry me. Maybe because there is some kinship there. Sounds like a new life, new rules, new place.
Yeeeesss...ultimately our experiences reflect ourselves, don't they? So the oppressive powers chasing us down turn out to be our own insecurities trying desperately to make us toe their arbitrary scared-shitless boundary lines... Fractured psyches at their best! LOL
Yeah, I'm in trouble with my fearful side, for stepping outside of myself into spirit. And crossing over to the other shore.
1) Let go of past issues - currently making yourself comforable in the past 2) Good sign that you're not causing any trouble 3) Your issue will sort itself out in the near future
Yes, the past issues topic is currently up for me, in more ways than one. And this dream is obviously part of that activity. Thanks for your reassuring insight.
Well mojave, you're in with a band of athletic pirates who are in for the long-haul endurance contest. If those guys who were after you show up on our island, we'll serve 'em rum and make 'em lighten up.
I say give 'em a broadside! Or, make 'em walk the plank! I think this dream clearly shows the inner struggle I'm having finding and connecting with my own heart, and spirit. The inner peace, love, joy, and self acceptance, which the Universe, including yourself, keeps directing me to, as the way to self Holistic Healing and spiritual freedom. You said, "Just rise up...", intellectually I get it. Yes it's just that easy... and, just that hard. Like telling an alky [which I was], just stop drinking. Obviously it can be done -- I did it. And it was as easy as just stopping -- and -- as hard as stopping being who you are -- which is how it is done. You don't stop drinking -- you stop being who you are -- an alky! And that -- IS NOT EASY! Once you are no longer and alky -- you don't drink. 'Casue, you're not an alky! Simple, huh?! In this case it is even more complicated. I don't clearly know WHO I have to stop being -- yet. I just know I have to stop it. Obviously, I've made some progress in that direction. But I think I've only nibbled around the edges so far. And that alone, is bringing my own internal enforcers down on me for stepping outside of myself. I wish I was already to the easy part -- accomplishment. Thanks for the help along the way.
