Help!! Single mother with an adolescent son!

I am a single parent to an eleven year old boy. He's not mine biologically, but I have the honor and privilege of raising him since his father died.

He's a fairly quiet kid in our completely 'out there' household. We're quite open about bodies, sexuality, and everything else, but I'm afraid that he won't come to me with questions about puberty, body changes, wet dreams etc.

Anyone got any advice for me?? I have some male family members who would talk to him, but they are all quite macho and he's not so much..........

I just don't want to bring it up on a drive one day...........'Hey, so how's that penis working out for you?'

ALSO, he's not circumcised, and I'm not sure if there are any 'mechanical' issues that I should be aware of........

 

Many boys that age aren't too comfortable talking to anyone male or female. My boys (now 18 and 20) looked at me like I was a kook when I would discuss it with them. I'm sure it depends on the boy though. Also, most boys around 11 and 12 have already had plenty of discussions about sex with their peers, which could be OK or the beginning of alot of false information.

You could point him to www.teenwire.com, a teenage sex info site sponsered by planned parenthood. The have a section called "Penis: An Owners Manual", http://www.teenwire.com/infocus/2001/if-20010301p092.php. It can be alot easier reading about sexuality for a teenager that talking about it, but by all means make sure he knows you are there to talk, also.

And you know the, "Hey how's that penis working out for ya?", approach really isn't a bad way to go either.

I wish you and your son the best.

 

WOW! You're great for being Mom to this boy...I'll bet you're good for him. The Penis talk thing is always tough since a kid usually knows " everything"... which often equals, not much. I've raised seven sons, Some of them could and did listen. Some of them I just sorta said "listen Bubba, I got some stuff to tell you so suck it up and listen" They've all done OK so I guess some of it maybe helped. You kind of mentioned he's not so Macho...if you have any inkling that he might be gay make sure you give him a safe feeling to be whoever he is...Sometimes that is literally a life and death issue for a young gay boy.

Theres also a great book called "The Wonder of Boys" by Micheal Gurian. I used it in raising my own sons' and I've also used it extensively when counseling parents of Boys...It gives great insight into the working of Boy's brains, the physiological reasons that produce the behaviors and emotions boys exhibit. Good luck to both of you. I hope a lot of smiles and grins are headed your way. Steve

 

Thanks for the help. I'm going to check out those websites!!