dissociative identity disorder. does anyone have this? it makes life very interesting i must say. also for me painful,but i guess thats part of life. being a hippie spiritual being helps alot. i'd like to talk about it if anyone is living with this. bobbeefree
I had disassociative idenity disorder as a result from PTSD. I have never met anyone else with it...so nice to meet you. I didn't have full-blown multiple personalities with different names and all, but pretty close to it. I have been two years without a split and have been 3 months without PTSD symptoms.
last night, there was a doco on tv about a woman who had seven personalitiesHer best friend from school met up with her after many years of no contact and decided to make a movie. it was a hard story to watch because of the emotion involved the program also discussed the false memory stuff. personally i don't agree with that line of thinking. it is a mental illness with all the stuff like stigma attached to it. i would be interested to know how all of cope and what you have learned to ease the struggle and how do you explain it to other people. Do you tell say, your co-workers. As a person with a mental illness, very few people in the real world know.
hey good to meet you bella and ava. D.I.D. is a severe form of P.T.S.D. it is usually caused by childhood trauma like abuse or whatever form of trauma a person experienced. i am glad you are improving. i had what is known as ritual abuse and did or do still have alter personalities but we are all in agreement to integrate. it takes time. i am on disability and don't have to deal with coworkers but there is stigma as i have learned and i am careful about tellling people i meet. i once was'nt and found people avoiding me because of the fear and ignorance concerning mental difficulties. that really hurt. i read all i could find about it and researched on the internet and discovered that there is recovery. i have to become aware of the abuse each alter suffered as they were formed to deal with different abuse situations as a child can't process this kind of trauma. its a sort of natural defense mechanism as many children do it and its much more common than once thought. i am very much affected and still spend alot of time alone. this site helps. i am in sort of an involuntary solitary confinement because there are times when i can hardly have a conversation with someone. i've tried smoking pot for the stress but its such a trip to do that and i don't much anymore although i wish i was in a situation where i could. anyway i could make a long list of symptoms that would never end. i keep a positive attitude although i am not a goal oriented person. it takes incredible amounts of work to recover. anyway thanks for responding.
thanks for replying as i am wanting to know more you both have given me alot to thi nk about my meds and a jay have kicked in, so it is bedtime for this little vegimite. till tomorrow
I did ERMD therapy to reprocess everything that happened and get all of my traumas out of my subconcious. I was also on a boat load of medications fo r awhile, which i am now waining off of. I never told any of my co-workers or anyone I was in a relationship with. My fiance knows. My mom is my only family member that knows. I really worked hard to get better. A lot of people who went what I went through would write off the rest of their life to PTSD and DID and let feelings of shame overwhelm them. It really took a lot of work. I can't even use words to articulate how difficult my journey was the first year I was diagnosed. There are entire relationships and friendships I have no recolection of. My grades slipped so bad I stopped going to school full-time so I could work full-time. Now I am out of therapy, graduated from college and am trying hard to have a healthy relationship with my fiance and family.
thanks for being so candid, bella and bobbee. it sounds like you have both worked hard to come thru the other side. i think it takes alot to take responsibility for your illness As i have explained, i did alot of work full time to aid my recovery. yet, it was worth it. Every so often i do a refresher coursejust to remind myself to use the skills i have learnt to cope Bella, i am inspired by your hard work as it has paid off. it also sounds like you have a great support system. i have a dog too and believe animals really help Bobbee, you too have real strength to overcome the hardship thrown your way i think stigma will never go away. the reason i asked was that a friend said i should tell more people about my illness but i have lost alot of friends due to lack of understanding. As i am trying to get my own buisness underway, co-workers are not a problem anymore i also don't want peoples pity when i watched the doco on tv, the woman with DID was self harming which upset me. I wish there were more services that were easily accessed by people who wanted more help thanks again
yeh i have been on disibility since i figured out i had did. the therapy i got was'nt very good as it was through a cmhc and they really had no expertise in dealing with me. mostly i have put together a recovery program on my own. i did have therapist to help manage my medications or get through some difficult times at first. i would go in to triage it seemed like once a month for awhile and i was hospitalized several times. i would also like to get off of my meds eventually. bella you are right about the work aspect. but honestly sometimes i make it sound easier than it has been. its taken a monumental effort of will and determination and help from others to get this far and i am still deeply affected. i have a good relationship with one sister and a few friends. mostly i have had to develop spiritually studying constantly eastern relegions, philosophy, psyhcology. i had friends who self harmed. it bothered me to. to let go of a fear of death as i was constantly faced with it as a child has helped alot. spent alot of time trying to control myself and my emotions out of fear. i think this life is just one of many or that i will get recycled some way so i can loosen up and try to enjoy this time on the planet. i love this site although am not into everything on here it offers an alternative way to be.
i think you are dealing with the responsibility of your illness,head on. that takes courage. i understand about work. telling people needs alot of trust and in that environment it often doesn't happen. self harm is scary and so many people don't understand. Working in the real world is difficult and it sounds like you have met and conquered some challenges - please correct me if i am wrong having a support system is always a help because it allows you to bounce ideas or talk o more than one person As for this forum, it is so big, it allows you to take what you want from it and discard the rest it sounds like you have a deep understanding of spiritual issues. Death is such a huge minefied. i think when we die, the wisdom of what we have learned goes somewhere - where, not sure
