If you were in an unhappy marriage????

.

 

I'd stay and try to make it work.
Cause once I get married thats it....

 

Unless he was abusive of course...
Otherwise I'd definately stay, no matter what.

 

okay but what if say y'all been together for 9 years and the happiness was gone and you needed to be happy and things are so bad that you needed medicated just to be around that person?

 

Thats the thing ya see...I met her online and we have fallen in love with each other and yes some ppl would cross that off from the start but I believe in love w/o meeting someone face to face. She wasnt happy, he doesnt give her what she needs so she came to me and it never was meant to turn out like this but it did. He's belittling her, telling her she's giving up on the marriage, that shes not willing to make it work. He is abusive from her accounts that she's told me.

 

9 years is a lot and I wouldnt throw that away.
Getting divorced would mean a failure to me.
How can things get bad when you're with someone that long ? I mean, love can go away, sure. But love isnt the most important thing. Atleast not to me.
When I get married it will be to someone I know well, someone like me, with similar opinions and same goals and interests. So I dont see how can that not work.

You started the thread and I still havent heard your opinion on this...

 

I dont know what to tell you...
I feel sorry for the guy...she went behind his back and fell in love with you.
So its him who should want divorce.

 

Okay but when you marry someone, you make a promise to love them and cherish them and so on. Not make them live in fear. she fears him. he has hit her on a few occassions and left her stranded and he doesnt support her in what she wants. he made her quit her job and stay at home and yeah I know you cant make anyone do anything other than put fear in them and belittle them. Her self esteem is so low and she feels she is underserving of anything..even my friendship. I spend everyday building her up, only for him to destroy her again.


Love is important to me..w/o love what is there?

 

my parents got married, had kids,
recently they discovered they don't like each other
so my dad cheats on my mom
and my mom is a spiteful dumb drunk who's losing all her brain cells in front of the television. they stay together. I don't know why.
I think they're afraid.
they fight a lot.
I'm never getting married...

 

Thats exactly it..FEAR.
Marriage is a good thing but you have to be devoted to it..like everyday of your life. love this person every waking breath you take...treat this person like y'all are the only two ppl on this earth. It has to be mutaul and thats why you shouldnt get married unless it totally feels right. My friend I'm talking about got married at 17 I believe b/c she feared being alone and thats where they messed up.

 

Thats sucks...Obviously these two have little in common and no mutual interests.
Thers no point in staying...Perhaps they should have gotten to know each other better before the marriage.
And physical abuse is just wrong...She should definately leave him.
And you shouldnt have gotten involved with a married person.

Love is important, but respect and understanding mean so much more to me than love does.

 

They got married very young..she was 17 I think?? and yeah maybe I shouldnt have gotten involved with a married chick but like I said it wasnt intended to turn out like this cuz I was just there to be her friend and this just happened. I care for her and love her too but he's forcing her to stay and she doesnt want too. he won't even let her call her dad to come and get her which is fucking bullshit but I can't do anything w/o getting fully involved which I don't wanna take that route.

 

so many people need to be liberated from themselves.