Thats right folks! Step right up! Time for me to type my problems on a forum for the public to marvel at how much i suck. That just shows how much of a emo bitch i am. So yeah... Im sick of being a loner. Ive been this way for too fucking LONG! I want to change this. You may be saying however, "well shit man, why dont you talk to people, dumbass?" That may work for you fine sir, but i think i may just have social anxiety disorder. What are the odds, lol. The thing is, i cant make friends, everytime i try to talk to new people, i feel akward. This feeling ozzes out of me like a festering sore. I feel i just cant talk to people. I also believe i suck major balls. I am NOT interesting, i am seldom funny, and people always think im pissed off God damnit, maybe i am always angry, maybe im just in fucking denial. Really, i am playful, and love to love, and want to be nice to people. I dont want to be mr. popular, but atleast be able to manage to have some good friends. But no, lol, i suck, im a fucking basket case. I cant manage friendship, let alone anything else in my fucking comedy of a life. Now, i wouldnt say this itself would make me take this life to the customer service booth in the sky. But if i were to remain this way forever, then maybe it is just another defect justifying to recall on my life. What can i do to remedy this? Please fucking tell me! Is there a certain substance that could help me? Maybe a herb akin to oregano? Huh? Goddamnit, i suck.
Emcipate yourself from mental slavery. None but ourselves can free our minds. Bob Marley. I'd start out taking small steps. Force yourself to talk to one new person each day. It'll be difficult at first but after awhile you'll become used to it. Keep giving your comfort zone little pushes every once in awhile.Before too long you'll learn to be self confident Take up a hobby. Become good at something. Start thinking about your positive attributes. Perhaps look into some counseling. Hope this helps.
dude, totally right on with the idea to smoke herb. Dunno bout you, but i was the angry loner.. I didnt have social anxiety to where I was shy, just assumed the worst in people and decided there was no point in wasting my time on anyone if they were all scum anyway. sure, i talked to some people, but no one I would call a friend.. then I was convinced to join student council cause of my college apps and the elected president of student council took me home and smoked me out for the first time.. changed my life drastically.. for the better in every aspect.. except for my memory of course lol but that was always bad.. Im not saying marijuana solves the problem, but it helps you, at least it did me, to analyze and dissect everything from a new prespective.. and helped me realize that it takes too much energy to hate, and that my precious time is better spent being happy and being me. also remember that you dont have to change yourself to find someone to like you. you will eventually find the one person who gets you and all your quirks.. also, better to be alone than in bad company and lastly.. what took me 23 years to find out.. it takes being a good friend to keep good friends.. good luck!!
No one, and I mean NO ONE, likes an emo kid. Smile and talk about happy things. Also, in my experience there are very few people who actually think they aren't awkward when they meet new people. I was definitley the same way for a long time. Just shift the conversation to something that you are comfortable talking about, and chat with them like they are old friends. When you are the one who is controlling the conversation in this way you put the person you are meeting at ease as well, and they will be infinitely more comfortable with you. And like you. And want to hang out wiht you, since you are so cool and you guys have so much in common.
i used to have a hard time starting converstations with people and like getting to know new people but i would say just go to social events events like parties and get wrecked then its never hard talking to people and more people will know you and you'll be getting more into group events and such. or if you not the party type then try sports or something cuz after i joined football i met lots more people and meting people wasn't such a big thing anymore. and i guess one more big thing i could tell you is doesn't really matter what people think of you just be yourself and no matter what you do its guarenteed someone isn't going to like you
sorry hon no herb is going to be your remedy. Its just going to numb the problem and you will soon rely on it for all your social outings. First of all stop saying you suck, and your not interesting. You tell yourself that enough, you start to believe it. Which it seems like you do. Instead tell yourself how amazing you are even if you dont believe it because eventually you will. I like your style of writing and your metaphor for suicide. Thats interesting, not many people are good at that. And Im sure if I talked to you I could find much more. As for the social anxiety a doctor could perscribe you something for it. I used to have wicked anxiety and panic attacks so I know what its like. Feel free to PM me or IM me. Hope I helped a bit.
Listen. That's all you have to do. Be truly interested in other people and listen to what they have to say. Really care about what they have to say. Don't worry about what you're going to say or what people think about you. If you're interested in them and listen to them, they'll think you're the greatest.
I know the feeling. I would rather hang out with my cats and a book than go out at night. BUt then I found friends that loved my just general quirky odd attitudes and my odd sense of humor. Im still akward around my friends but thats what makes me me. I just found friends that were as weird as me. and I took a chance and said hi to some people and now I have friends not tons of friends but I have a few really close friends give it some time and take the chance and say hello to someone at school.
I think TreeHuggerT has good advice. I would only add that you might want to reconcile yourself with your nervousness/awkwardness around others. Why try to rid yourself of feelings before you fully understand them? And please stop playing victim to yourself and beating yourself up ("I fucking suck! I suck!"). That's not cute. P.S. I know you want some magic bullet solution (e.g., herb, etc.). But that's not how it works.
I feel ya, but I can keep some friendships. The main key is force yourself to let your innerself free. Who cares what others say or think of you. I am sure you would be an awesome person to talk to...dont give up
hey man this is how i see it, maybe you get nervous when you talk to people because you're afraid they won't like you? if that's that case then nevermind them, not everyone you meet will like you, that's a fact of life, but if you just be yourself, say what you want to say and behave in a way that you are comfortable with then there WILL be people who will like you and want to be friends. and just going on what everyone else has been telling you, try to get out there and meet new people who you find interesting and have similar tastes in music etc. hope i helped man peace
Whatever you do don't start smoking any herb! It will increase your introspection and make talking to people ten times worse, it will amplify any problems and anxiety. Like somebody else said earlier in this thread, try talking to one new person every day, if they dont like you then tough, they weren't worth knowing anyway! It's a new year so now is the ideal time to start a fresh
Get your ass outside! I was a social mess in high-school. I never went to the dances, never talked with *gasp* girls, never had good friends. When I hit college, I made a commitment to change that. First thing I started doing was going to the gym; I was overweight, so my motivation was to lose the weight. But something wonderful happened. I became confident! I also had a lot more energy to do things; I'm currently into mountain biking, and come this spring I want to get into road biking. But you see, I'm doing things with my life. I'm still a geek at heart; and do my geeky things, but I mingle well with people. It's incredible, but I'm rarely ever angry or pissed off; I smile a lot more and I keep a positive outlook on life. All these wonderful things because I started going to the gym and doing other none-geeky activities... Confidence is beautiful! Being able to do more than 1 push up is also helpful. Also, there are over 6 billion people in this world; you are not suppose to like each and every one of them! Good luck!
The most important thing is to be happy with yourself. Smile and try to help everybody. And be yourself. Most people won't like you, but those who do, will be really really good friends to you.
I feel the same as u nut to a lesser degree, i keep ahold of my anger which just makes it worse. I have difficulty mainly aaround women but have managed to overcome my anxiety t conversations with people. I know it sucks but just pull through man, if yu r at the very bottom things can only get better
Hmm... I know what you mean. And I'm not just trying to sympathize with you. I seriously used to have the same sort of problems. I wasn't a loner by choice, I was pretty much an outcast most of my life, I just didn't fit in with any "crowd". People in general liked me I guess, but mostly I just blended in and wasn't really anyone someone would seek out. I don't really know what happened. I just snapped out of it one day. I never really had trouble making friends, I guess, but I always did it in a round about way. I'd steal my sister's friends, or make friends with friends of friends. I was just never comfortable in situations where I didn't already know people, it was hard to just get started. Once people got to know me, they grew to love me and now I have some amazing friendships that I couldn't even begin to explain where they came from. I would never just tell you to stop being shy or whatever you feel, social anxiety, because I know that can't happen. Shit I still feel self-conscious sometimes in awkward situations. I'm going to tell you something that helped me to find my voice and people will think that I'm retarded or whatever, but honestly it was the internet. I met people online or in chatrooms or where ever that allowed me to be myself. And I realized, wow, these people like me, maybe I can be ok being myself other places. It really was a slow process but eventually it brought me to where I am today. I know that sounds lame and most people on here will just tell you go smoke pot to relax you and hang out with pot heads. I guess you can do that if that is what you want to do, but it isn't a quick fix either. Do you have any interests? Could that help you get to know different people? I think what others have said though, rings true. You have to figure out what it is about you, that you don't like that is holding you back. I didn't learn this until I was like 23 or so years old, but some people were sitting in the break room at my work and they were talking about people who don't say "good morning" and how they thought that people who didn't say "good morning" were stuck up or ass holes, etc. I couldn't help myself for some reason I just burst out (extremely uncommon for me) and I said "I'm sorry I don't say good morning to everyone, I'm just really shy and I don't know what is really appropriate or not". Their jaws dropped. They weren't talking about me, as they all knew how shy I was, but then something happened and every day since then I have always said good morning to my co-workers, even if they don't say it back. Now, no one can say I'm an asshole for not saying good morning.
i felt like a loner for a long time then i made a ton of friends in different places then I realized I really just prefer being along and just maybe visiting a couple select people every now and then I'll tell you the truth, most people suck. For the longest time I thought it was just an issue with me, tried to remedy it. But like I said, I did manage to remedy it and all that resulted in was me finally realizing why I had the whole problem in the first place... most people just suck Or the real issue is probably that I need to move somewhere better
I find the hatred and piss taking of what everyone says is "emo behaviour" (like nearly anytime someone cries or whatever) is tragically ironic. Because I don't think I've ever met anyone with the guts to be truly emotionally open. So yeah, theres no need for anyone to beat themselves up over being socially phobic.
let your self free !! meet ppl socialize whether it be listening or talking ... i know going through the bad times in my life i communicated with ppl i didn't know and BOOM- i had something in common with them and i exchanged numbers with them and we were the best of friends. My 1 really good friend whom i have been friends with for over 25 years has been my friend for that long . But shes a travellor i don't see much of her. Most of the i quote "friends" i thought i had just wanted my husband which in my case thats not a friend. Aquaintances as well is good to have- walk by hey how ya doing, so i heard so & so blah blah Would you like to go out for a coffee? ttyl kinda thing . It doesn't take much but i hear what your saying keep your head up high.
