Possibly considerably insane or a new ??

Attempting to make since of it all?

For as long as i can remeber ive allways wonted to be famous for my actions. Not like live the high life or anything but just be known for my thoughts and inteletcual motivation. My friends dont understand me, they think its the drugs(I havent even triped acid but once or eatin mushrooms so that also doesnt make since) or possible insanity. Why would they consider my outlook of higher learning insane?
But im deffinatly constaplating on being a save for my generation that or my brain just accepts life in a new way maybe?

I often feel like i dont get enough sleep because when i wake up i remeber my last thoughts before bed and can quote my self for much of the thoughts i had during my resting time. I feel i think to much in my sleep and when i wake i dont feel really rested. I see things hear things which could be possible insombia.maybe? but the facts are this

I simply at my age am not able to accept any situation normally and over analyze everything and its driving me crazy.
My thinking process is becoming something i cant handle because no one understands why i feel the things i do or understand them due to using the wrong word structure.

For instance though i look at anything and everything and get a million thoughts per second. I look at houses and picture them being built,being demolished, life in and out of the homes. in a split second. etc. with most objects. Instead of being just happy with everything my brain searches for physics to analyze things before i am able to really even grasp anything.this becomes a problem when you get over worked about a chair becase the only thing u can think of is how it was made where it was made why.or what the person was thinking that manufactuared instead of simply just enjoying its comfortablness...

Alot of this may seem like jibber and like i said i have a horriable way of gettin points out quickly..but if anyone can understand what im trying to say feedback would be nice....

 

The exact same thing happens to me, Except I really don't care when it happens. I understand exactly what your talking about. Try to find my thread called "Mind Shapes" and see if you understand that at all.


But for me, I really just accept it and move on. I get a perfect amount of sleep and I have happy dreams every night. All you need to do is CHILL

 

Young johshua tree .At some point reading your post it 'all started to make sense' you have an honest writing style and through it I had a glimpse. Sounds intense to me but it's you're world so I imagine you're used to seeing everything at once. Maybye you will leave a mark on the world.

 

I find your thoughts very interesting and imaginative. There's nothing wrong about thinking too much, after all Rene Descartes used to say, 'I think therefore I am.'

Your friends may say you are crazy for wishing to become known for something because it seems a very difficult road and sometimes impossible. It's a complicated route.
But I believe you have very nice dreams and it's great to wish to become somebody.

 

well after this post i thought more about some of my views and ideas. I was raised in christianity but have many reason why i dont comply. Ive been real strict on a belief in karma. and have taken a sit down and reading about hinduism. maybe a based religion could also help me find a place. but my friends think of me as crazy for most of my off the wall ideas and how i explain them. for instance last night i came to the conclusion that we really do shape our life out.its all up to use. Because think of it in this perspective. If your raised poor and grow poor and never choose to make anything of your self thats and idea left to YOU that you control and there for your life shapes to be poor. If your raised poor and aim for higher it takes you where you wanna go because aiming for goals and opportunity that is higher then where your at usually carriers you along way. or if you are raised rich then you usually have the traits to alrighty grow rich because its your natural state of mind because its what your born into..and then of course if your average and decide to make something of yourself your mind frame gives you the ideas to do things that will take you where you wanna be and seeing that in that way we really actually do control our lives.because when you set your self goals you also will see downfall and what will stop you from achieving your goals. its up to you if your goal is important enough to not let the opsticle get in yourway.so therefor everything is up to us. I also posted something where i said the world is actually beautiful when you look at its orgins spearm n seeds. thats a preety um weird way of thinking of it.but those are the ideas that are randomly added to my head naturally..which is why i think im going crazy...cause when you actually look at a car as a drop of spearm in your mind..you might could get where im going with this..

 

I'm going to cut you some slack about your sloppy grammer. You're embarrassing yourself enough.

Leave the nest. I know how pretty NC is, but it must be done. You can always return if you want to later. I left my hometown and never had any real desire to return. I was able to find what I wanted elsewhere.

I suspect you will too.


x

 

again, i'm the exact same way. everything you described i can directly relate to. your not special for being able to think "a million thoughts a second". many people can do it. i can. I know one other person who is the same way. it's not a big deal, it's not extraordinary. it just means you think a lot. it's more of your personality. you need to chillll out.

 

Hey there. Well i have read what you have had to say, and i honestly think your making it out to be more than it truely is. I have the same thought patterns and I have had alot of problems sleeping, due to my mind going 90 to nothing all the time. Sometimes its the worst as I lay down. I see where your coming from, but millions are just like us. I've learned through meditation, that I can control these thoughts and just let things be what they are without having to over analyzing everything. You spoke of it being to hard to conform to your christian background, as your parents would have it. I have had the hardest time believing the same, so i spent alot of my time studieing many different religons and philosophys. The way i learned i learned how to slow my thoughts were through these practices. Check out The Way of Zen by Alan Watts. It really helped shape the erson i am today. It was a nice tool. Well i hope you find peace. Just relax and let life be.......

 

Oh yeah I forgot to add that someone once said that If your questioning your sanity, than your sane. Because a sane man wouldnt question his sanity.....
I cant remember who though

 

yeah man i got spinned out when i thought how did mdma come from bacteria

 

Dude, I'm just as insane as you are! Except, I don't feel enlightened or anything... I completely accept the fact that I might just be a little crazy and get on with it... for the most part. What else can you do, right?

Even like you were saying about visualizing how regular things came to be, I do the same thing. Or like how something might have been invented and what thought patterns of complete geniousness gave birth to just normal things we use every day.

I don't obsess on weird shit like I used to, but since I'm still the same guy inside, weird thoughts like this still cross my mind - but since I'm fine with it now, they do no harm. Now instead of it being over analysis, it just became regular analysis.

Also... nobody can follow the way I structure thoughts and sentances. I'll make sense, but throw people off somehow and I'll have to go back and explain what I meant about what I was explaining to begin with. Drives me nuts!

But yeah... maybe we just think about shit a little differently. Who knows? Plus, on top of it all... I've never taken any drugs of any kind... which to most people, that's kind of odd and hard to believe. Really helps my cause when I'm trying to convince somebody I'm not completely crazy...

 

you are normal young humans who are learning. hopefully more and more people will escape the dulling of the man made world and be able to question whats around them. happy thinking!