oh my fucking god! ur not gonna believe this

ok i just had the most fucked up thing ever happen. recently i bought an eight off a new connection, so i saved everything but 2small joints for tonight, my last day of college until new years and and a time i thought would be sweet. so im thinking how to not get caught (told my mum i quit and she was happy and everything long time ago) so i think i will wait till my mum goes to sleep, go in the back garden and smoke. so im thinking if she pops out for a smoke she wont see me in the far back due to darkness and the heavy fog. so i jam there hapily at like 12:10, blazing my spliff, thiniking i have all thought out and nothing can go wrong, no need for paranoia just happy times. so erm i almost finished the joint, and i hear my door open and slightly see my mum walk out for a cigg. so im high as kite, dont want to get caught so i stay still waiting till she goes. she does, i finsih the joint, and go to my backgarden door to the house.... its locked.( we have 1 key to the conservatory door there, we keep it in the door on inside always, so she must have locked it by habbit at night) so erm im thinking ... FUCK!!! i think about what i will do and all that, while still thinking if she lets me in now she will tell im high, so i need to wait for the smell to wear off and to get less buzzed out. i wait 10min, then start banging on the door nothing happens. i have nothing on me but a lighter at this point. so theres a way to get onto the roof of ground floor toilet, slightly angled but flat, its by climbing on few things and then neighbours fence, and then on the roof with a few bricks leaning out. so i get up and start banging on the second floor toilet window ( she sleeps on other side of that floor, towards the street) so i htought wtf now, i bang and bang and nothing. so i think ill wait it out, she wakes up at 04:30, fine ill make it. i climb downand sit down, after 10 min im freezing cold ( just hoodie and jacket on, in 0celcius temp, in freezing fogg, my nose was dead almost, same with hands even tho they were in pockets) so i think i will die loool, and i thought about jumping down from the first roof to the street side, maybe a 3-3.5m drop, but its on the driveway, angled (can fuck up feet), but only way to get there, other houses block any round ways. so i cant jump it, im slightly paranod at this point now. so im like really talking to myself saying fuck again and again, i remembered these nature shows with this bush living guide, survival in bush or something- i watched alot of those shows, i liked the whole survival in the wild idea. so i started thinkin i need fire, now right at th back of garden is a spot where theres a hard plastic roof, and theres a high cement wall holding it at the corner(cement wall for some club house there or something) so theres a hole in the plastic and its directly underneath the spot i would make fires at at night and sit with some friends while drinking. so theres plenty of old logs, but theyre frozen. theres a candle on the table there, its frozen with layer of ice. i use my lighter to dry little splinters to light.... nothing, frost fucked everything up. so im like fuck it. so i wait maybe 10-15 min and decide im going braveway... i climbed on the roof again, banged on the windows really hard for like 5min straight again, finally she opens. so she is looking at me like a ghost (and im thinking ur not high right now, nothing is real, u control everything through ur imagination) so lol before she even says anything, i just angrily half shouted what the hell are you thinking, you locked me out th house, ive been knocking for so long, its fucking freezing outside, how could you do that??? shes like what? i said i wnet out for a cigg at the back, i come back doors locked!. so yeah she lets me in and goes to sleep 99% sure not suspecting a thing, well hopefully.

so yea haha, my crazy adventure. im not sure how i wrote this since im still intensiley high, so if it doesnt make sense i will make it better another time/.

:lol: got into it so easily tho, and now sitting here is still so simple

 

You are in college at 16? Damn, I thought I was young at 17. As for your paranoia, i seem to recall reading about how paranoia is just another word for ignorance.

 

That's the funniest story I've heard in a while. Glad everything worked out okay.

 

Obviously you have never been paranoid.

I mean, what would you do? Stuck outside, freezing cold. I'd be paranoid, high or not!

 

he's from the UK, college doesn't mean the same thing.

 

yes but you see so many times me being paranoid ( aware of possible outcomes) i have avoided situations, and avoided many bad outcomes, sometimes not, but still have been paranoid about the possibilities. so when u think what can possibly go wrong? and it goes fucked like this... shit man. i have weed left still that i want to smoke, but im scared to go out now LOL xD

 

Paranoia is the opposite of ignorance.

People who are paranoid weigh up all negative outcomes and are very aware of things.. they worry about what could go wrong all the time meaning they are very alert.

 

^ bingo

 

So then why didnt he stay outside and explore? Why did he fear the paranoia and try to go back to a more known environment? Had he stayed outside he may have learned something.

 

yea my nose/cheecks are hurting right now, same with my hands. i was freezing cold, maybe it would be sick to freeze, but i did not feel like it tonight. also i just had to take the biggest dump right now, i dont think i would have held it till morning, and bush shitting isnt really my thing. i had a fun experience with a good ending, im keeping nature games for warmer climates

allthough i admit when i decided to make a fire, it was thrilling, having a little survival session. but the wood was frozen, i didnt have my swiss army on me, and i didnt have many clothes on.

 

He wanted to get warm. He only went out there to smoke, not to explore. He knows what his backyard is like anyway.

 

Haha, well in a case like that you just have to laugh it off haha. Good tale to tell the toking circle. So how long total were you outside?

 

hahaha nice story.btw she lets u smoke cigs but not weed?

 

^ yeah, she thinks pot fucks with ur mind and life too much. anyway wow today it seems like a dream, total i was out was maybe 40-60min, i cant tell exaxctly because of no clock and being high. when i got back, i smoked my bong out of the window, so yh thats the best way for now. but you dont imagine the feeling tho, ur high, happy and ur thinking ah yes im gonna watch i am legend now, an u cant get insidE!!! lol but yes its a great stroy to tell lol

 

That was a good story...you should collect some lock picking skills so that doesn't happen again though*: )

 

^ haha i actually thought about it yesterday, some way to bust the lock open, but i had no tools nothing, shed and garage are locked. so there was nothing

 

Shit man, thats a lot to read and i have a killer headache.

 

to sum it up for you he went out to smoke a joint then his mom came out to smoke a cig. Green hid from his mom cause he didnt want her to know he was smoking pot. So she went inside and locked the door. Green was trapped outside in the cold for a while banging on windows and shit for a while until she opened the door for him.

 

haha that's a pretty funny story
i'd be pissed if i got locked out in the freezing cold

 

hah, i had to sleep on a street in madrid all night once cause the train station closed for the night.