Why must everyone get fucking married?

Everyone I know is popping out babies and marrying off in droves, why is this? What is so great about marriage that I cant see? All the married people I know want to be single, and all the single people I know want to be married. With the alarming number of married men trying to jump in my pants on a regular basis, why would I even entertain the idea of promising my life, my time, and my credit score to anyone?

When you reach a certain age, you are some kind of social pariah if you are not paired off. I'm 25 years old, I cant even commit to a long distance carrier, much less a whole person. Am I in the minority of thinking that this marriage business sounds overrated? I've been proposed to twice, I laughed it off as a joke each time. I cant imagine looking at the same person every day for the rest of my life!

No I do not have horrible relationship role models, my parents are sickeningly happy and normal. No I havent had some sort of man debacle that has made me shun marriage. No I am not anti-love, or anti-relationship even. I just dont fucking get why people are so eager to be married. Maybe it's because I live in the South where a vast majority of people think the greatest accomplishment you can have in life is to get married, knocked up, and spend all your time talking about rivers and deer stands.

 

People are afraid to spend the rest of their life alone... so they get married.

Lots of social pressure to get married, as well as external factors such as impromptu pregnancies.

People then realize that they don't really want to spend the rest of their lives with that one person, so they cheat or divorce.

I don't really see the point of marriage... but if people wanna get married, that's cool. I'm a firm believer in divorce.

 

THAAANK YOU!

i can't fucking see why people are apeshit to get married, either. my 17 year old sister just got engaged to my 25 year old best friend, and it makes me sick. even more so, because they've only been dating TWO months. also, out of my graduating class, a good 30-40% of them are already married and have at least one or two kids. and i'm only 23. it's fucking ridonkulous!

personally, i'm more against the "official, legal" marriage, than anything else. i wouldn't mind finding a girl to spend my life with, and even having a ceremony in which our friends and family come to witness us bonding with each other, and making that commitment. i just don't feel the reason in having that little piece of papers, that doesn't REALLY prove you're any more in love, than if you just stayed together.

and fuck, not this soon, man! i don't even want to THINK about anything CLOSE to that (kids, or marriage) until i'm in my early to mid 30's at leeeeast. i have so much more life to live! why settle down now?

 

Marriage is the leading cause of divorce.

 

Well, I feel about marriage the same way. I'm just not ready yet. My parents keep talking about it, and I'd feel really as a prisoner if I married right now...

 

I'm just tired of getting those "Oh pitiful you" looks for all the morons that are wed and sperminated. I'm not pitiful, I'm free. They'll be divorced in a few years and I'll be successful and single.

I can go move to Tahiti and open a pina colada stand if I wanted while they'll still be here with a kid hanging off their tit. I killed a houseplant last week, I'm certainly not ready for babies. More importantly, most of them werent ready for babies either. Birth control people, get with it.

 

I

 

I've never had an STD or been beaten by some man, nor have I ever been pregnant or had an abortion or any of that other madness. Just because one is single, doesnt mean they're humping entire populations. I cant imagine finding one man for forever, but that doesnt mean I'm gonna fuck them all to get to that conclusion. I'm not anti-companionship, or relationship (like I said) I just dont get the appeal of marriage.

I'm glad that someone out there has an allegedly (sorry had to say it) happy marriage.

I also realize that I've never been with anyone that I wanted to marry. Maybe if that takes over me one day then I'll be wanting to jump on that wagon.

 

What you are discribing can be applied to any relationship, not just marriage.

All marriage does is institutionalize the relationship... which in my humble opinion is completely unnecessary.

You shouldn't need something like marriage to symbolize a commitment that is already there. Plus, if the commitment ever breaks or deteorates, then the marriage will only keep you from separating and seeking other people.



Also... I may be a little extremist in saying this, but I think that it's a little sad that people are so depended on another person to make them happy. I am completely happy in my independece, and don't feel like I need someone else to constantly be there to make me feel good about myself. I know that this doesn't apply to most people though... just a personal point.

 

wow i have been trying to put that thought into words for people to understand for soooo long now, and you made it so simple. i agree 100%, and i hope you dont mind if i tell this when my family goes on about me getting married in future etc. great post =)

 

You go for it mate, cheers for the kind words.

 

q

 

is marrage only for the religious?

 

no.. its for the naïve.. the current dick is "married" (commomlaw) but spends all his time with me. I want to feel bad for "being the other woman", but im not betraying anyone. he is, and wether his concience is ok with that or not, then thats his deal. I am not pressuring him to leave her, or hogging his time by forcing or whining or nagging..he chooses to.. he sees his time with me as a getaway.. and I like the sex and friendship without the relationship bullshit and drama.. Four years relationship free and looking forward to many more years..

 

Marriage may be for some people, but it's certainly not for me.

Reasons I would not get married:
#1 People change. The person you fell in love with might not be the same in ten years. And vice versa. There is no reason to make a promise to someone that in the future, neither of you might be able to keep. If you love someone, you will want them to be happy.
#2 People can spend years together, sometimes a lifetime (if they're lucky) and still be completely faithful to each other. They don't need a piece of paper to know they love each other and that they're committed.
#3 People who get married often lose their sense of identity, and often are mistakenly led to believe they are a unit, instead of two personalities, and often try to change each other. Thus = divorce. I'm all for divorce by the way. If two people no longer love each other or can no longer make it work they should not feel pressured to stay together simply because they are married. And what about cases of abuse? Sometimes people make the wrong choices in a marriage partner and end up being hurt physically and emotionally. There's no reason to stay together then! And if they had been living together she could simply pack up and go, without having to go through the legal process of divorce. Married people tend to forget a lot of their friends and family and become immersed in this institution called "marriage". People who are dating or simply living together tend to have more freedom with outside friendships and family.
#4 I honestly believe two people can spend a great amount of time together and have a wonderful, loving relationship, and should it end on good terms (because one or both have changed in those years or simply fallen out of love), continue a friendship and remember the good times they had. Perhaps this is what the hippie ideal of free love truly means?
#5 Common law marriage or long term living together is not bad for kids, as long as the parents make time to be in their child's life. In my opinion, it's no different than regular marriage except for the fact that those two people respect each other enough to let one another be free to be themselves. They can agree on a situation that works for them both.
#6 I do believe people rush into marriage, and later realize they never knew that person at all.
#7 The main reason I may never marry and the one that made me realize marriage for me is bullshit is that I like women more than men. If women can live together happily without marriage then so can a man and a woman. I do believe in committed relationships. But I don't see any reason at all to get married.

 

I'm only 21 and my 25 year-old married sister was telling my parents last time we saw her: "It's almost time for another wedding!!!"

I started naysaying: "No way! It's not gonna be me, anyway. I'm not getting married!"

She thought it was kinda funny.

 

I felt old when the first of my friends got married.

I felt really old when the first of my friends got divorced.