Non-Romantic. Doubt About "Best Friend."

Hello, all of you beautiful people. I wasn't sure which forum to post this in, but this one seemed semi-appropriate, since it does have to do with a relationship.

I have known one of my best friends for about...twelve or so years. Like most friendships, during that time we've had ups and downs. The most recent event, though, left me feeling really sad, and I'm not sure if I'm overreacting or am justified in being upset.

She and I are from the same town, and our parents live there still. I live about twenty minutes from our hometown, and she lives six hours away from it. So, she's not around much. When she does come to town, it's usually for holidays or events like birthdays.

Last Easter, she came out to celebrate the holiday with her family. She hung out with other friends, one of whom currently lives in my town, but never called or otherwise communicated with me. I asked her about it, after I found out she was in town for four days, when she returned to her six-hour-away home, and her answer for not calling me was, "I thought you'd be busy." After telling her that I wasn't, and even if I was, I'd make time for her, I thought all was well.

Come to find out she was in town for Thanksgiving, and the same thing. No call, no text, no pony express letter, nothing. She hung out with other people though, and that hurts my feelings. I haven't done anything to make her mad (that I know of), so I'm not sure what the deal is.

I'm tempted to just wait and see what goes on for Christmas and then take it from there. Has anyone else felt slighted in this way before?

Thanks, and MUCH love to you all.

 

My dear you are not necessarily going to like what I have to say.

As people grow older they do grow apart. The people and friends that we have had for years usually drift on and become less significant.

She has given you excuses. But look at her actions on two different occasions.

The people you grew up with will not be your friends for the rest of your life. People and interest change.

Oh sure the old friends will ad you to their myspace page and you will get the occasional call.

We grow in life sometimes apart. It breaks my heart that your friend is treating you this way. You are making all the effort here. What has she done?

The friends you make from now on are going to be your true friends. Yes ,it is sad letting friends go but it opens up exciting new opportunities to meet new people.

Always be there for her if she makes some effort to communicate with you. But do not emotionally set yourself up for disappointment if her actions do not match what she is doing.

This was one of the hardest lessons I had to learn.

The third time is the charm. If her actions are different that her excuses, is it worth it to keep setting yourself up for disappointment?

I hope this has a happy ending for you. But if it doesnt cut your losses and move on. There is tons of people that would love to be your friends and their actions will prove that.

 

Aw, thank you, Unknown. It's true; people do grow apart. It just saddens me...I honestly think that deep down inside, I know that we are not the friends we used to be, but part of me keeps hoping for the good 'ol days, you know?

I always wish for the best, and sadly, I'm not sure what the future holds for she and I. I do know that I have a lot of other wonderful friends, who would never be this indirect with me.

...the way I found out she was here on Thanksgiving and hung out with others was an answer in a MySpace survey she did yesterday.

Seriously, thank you for the insight. Sometimes I just need to be shaken.