Funny or embarrassing sex stories.

fuck you fuck

 

Maybe you didn't see it

 

most of my stories arent too hilarious...theyre just like...sex filled. hmmmmm...well recently i was at this festival and me and 3 of my friends were chillin at this bench by the beach. these old hippies walk over and they offer to smoke us up. i was the only one to actually smoke..and i was drunk off my ass anyway. sooo...after the hippies bounced, the pot settled in and everything that touched my felt like..10 times more insane. this guy steve obviously felt that that was the best time to start sucking on my neck (which is already my weakness)...so i was like..moaning insanely and almost gasming the entire time..in public....I'm now nicknamed moaning lisa. but eh, I got my chick friend back because she's the cowgirl (always straddling something)

 

lolololol that poor lil dog!
thats some funny shite

 

eeek... I'm so embarrassed. I was at my boyfriends house and um we decided to just go at it on the living room floor because his grandmom wasn't home and wouldn't be. So anyway, we just got done and are sitting there and she comes in the door. I ran and slammed a door shut and he just sat there w/ no pants on because he was so shocked. She goes, "maybe u should put ur pants on" she thought she caught him by his self. I found this hallarious and I'm sturggling in the dark to put my pants on the right way but anyway long story short she found out I was there put the puzzle together, kicked us out and locked the doors all freaked out and went back to work. I think I'm going to die of embarrassment. His grandmother... oh god...

 

well i was going at it with like 3 other people and we broke like 5 peices of furniture that night. how we did that is a very long story...

the next day we were all covered with bruises from the pool table collapsing under us.

 

My boyfriends mom and step dad were gone on a trip so we decided that we were going to have sex in his gameroom...We had just started and his dad came through the door and started yelling, so we grabbed the clothes and went to run upstairs to his room but we ended up tripping on the clothes and falling to the bottom of the steps where his dad was standing. I was so embarrassed, I refused to ever be in the same house as his dad ever again.

 

One time a girl was sucking my dick and then her grandma came at the best time possible and the girl was holding my and turned and i came all over the side of her head while her grandma watched

 

I don't think pool tables are meant to hold 4 people...2 is the maximum capacity...

 

Yeah, Bloody_Kisses and our friends learned that the hard way.

 

next time lets do it on the broken pool table bound with rope while your holding a knife to my neck
....i like to sweat.

 

Rape = no.

 

no raping. just fucking.

 

We can do the rope thing, but no knife.