I just need some friendly advice. I was at this party two weeks ago at a friends house, and one of my friends who i've known for more than a year, and who i've been in love with a couple of months (since this summer) was there. Well, we were drinking and having fun. He went into the living room and started to play guitar, i sat next down to him. Some people came around and he gave the guitar away, then i put my head on his chest and he put his arm around me. He took of his shoes and lay down on the couch, i took of my shoes and lay next to him. Then, i don't really remember who but someone put a blanket on us. And he pulled it way over us. So we lay there for a couple of HOURS, cuddling, touching and eventually we kissed! This was my first kiss. Well, the thing is. When he left he said to me "Tomorrow!", i said i was busy and then he said "Monday then." I didn't hear from him all week, he doesn't have my phone number eventhough i've known him for over a year. But he has my email adres, so he could easily mail me or talk to me on msn. But he wasn't online when I was. Anyway, after 5days of frustration, i saw him on friday in the music club we always hang out almost every weekend. I was there with a couple of friends, he came in and didn't even came to say hi. Alot of his friends were there and he went to sit with them. A friend of mine tried to talk to him about what happend and she said that 'He didn't want to talk about it.' But she said to me 'Maybe he want's to talk about it with you, he's definatly going to come over...' After two of my friends left, he came to sit with me. Finally. It was fun, we talked about alot of stuff, joking around. But he didn't say anything about what happend. He did talk about the party. But just not about that...He drove me home. But yet, nothing happened, because well, there were alot of people around. And at the end of the evening he seemed sad and somewhat irritated, he didn't say much. But he still was kind to me, as he always is... The next day i heard from my best friend, who's boyfriend is friends with him. That her boyfriend tried to talk to him about it, but he didn't react. The her boyfriend said "I heard that you kissed her". And he said that it wasn't true! Then he asked if he did something wrong, her boyfriend said that he just has to face it and take actions. His awnser was that it wasn't that easy for him either... And when I saw him that evening he looked happy to see me, smiling and joking with me. My friends said that he was constantly following me with his eyes. Anyway, I don't know what to do?! What do I mean to him? He says I'm his friend, he says I'm his best friend. Nothing more? I don't know where I stand... Should I ask him? Or should I just see what happens? He's always trying to hold my hand, touching. Smiling. When we're in one place together, we always hangout with eachother. He's driven me home twice. And I live a long way away! This insecurity is killing me. I want to ask him, but thats so confronting for him and i don't want to scare him away... Please help, sorry this is so long. xx
I would just talk to him.. maybe he's just confused about what he feels for you.. it's better to know then drive yourself crazy like this.. wish I could be more help..
I would just hang out for a bit and see what happens. He might be nervous and not wanting to rush into things. Maybe he doesn't know how you feel about him. It could also be that he knows he'd be "the first" (I assume that since he was your first kiss) and is worried that he'll hurt you. When you see him be friendly, but not "puppy dog" eager. At most some night when you guys are just talking tell him "you know, I really like you" and see what happens. Ask your friends to leave it alone for now, and let the poor guy think. It's hard to get your head straight when people are always grilling you. It's hard to say, but badgering him about things won't help you. Just give it some time and see what happens. The waiting sucks, but might just be worth it in the end.
He obviously likes you more than a friend, and more than a chick he just wants to fuck. He just wants to take it slow because he doesn't want to get hurt, or he's shy.
Why don't you do something spontanious like kiss him when you feel like kissing him, take some action, ask him out or something, don't involve other people, make it nice and simple and don't think much about it! peace
Ellis - you're not 18, are you? This romance does not sound like something two 18 year olds would do - more like two 14 year olds just experiencing their first romance, something which one or both of you are unprepared for. You are playing an adult game, so give it time. Don't rush it. It will happen if it was meant to be.
I was thinking the same thing. It reminded me of being 15 and sneaking a kiss with a cute "boy" and really hoping that he likes me. I am reminded of the song with the "do you love me...check yes or no" lyrics. Can't remember the song exactly.... I can honestly say I don't miss being a teenager
No, don't ignore it. Shy guys that get ignored turn into assholes and users later on in life. Trust me I know. Give him a chance, be delicate with his feelings.
Remove everyone except the two of you from the equation, and see where it takes you. Learn to speak for yourself and be a bit more assertive.
First of all, I am 18. He's 22. And this truly is my first romantic experience, this is even the first guy who I ever let hold my hand. He has had two girlfriends in the past. Both cheated on him. The last one was over a year ago, I met him a little after they broke up. She cheated on him with his best friend after a 2year relationship. She still has a relationship with this guy. Just so you know And maybe this is the reason why he is doubting? Afraid to get hurt again? Well I decided to talk to him this weekend, on friday I saw him but he was somewhat drunk, so I thought maybe that isn't the right time to talk about it. I saw him again the day afterwards and it was like everything is back to normal. And well, there were a lot of people around again...So I chickend out and didn't talk to him about it. And something strange happened. The drummer of his band called my name (I don't really know this guy, I saw him 2 times or something), I was sitting a bit furder away from them. I looked and the drummer pointed to him and asked "He's your boyfriend hey?" And he was sitting right next to him. Now what does that mean? :huh: A friend of mine gave me the advice to just go to his house when I know for sure that he's at home and talk to him then, that way he can't avoid to talk... But I don't know about that. Anyway thanks for the advice! I hope I find the courage to talk to him about it. I think I really should, because this is driving me crazy. Thanks and I'll keep you posted. xx
