Hi, I read a bunch of the forums and wondered if I could get some suggestions. My wife and I are in our mid-forties and have been married over 20 years and have a really good sex life when it comes to straight sex. We fuck probably 5 times a week and she almost always releases. My problem is that I get a bit bored with this routine -- I want to do other things, notably [more] oral and anal. We do some oral -- not nearly enough, but I could just ask more. However, what I really, really want to do is to fuck my wife in the ass. We have done it probably 10 times in 20 years. It's great, but I have issues of my own. My wife has never asked for anal. However, she also has rarely done a straight "No", either. She has released from it probably half the time. She has never complains about pain, but she always complains that she feels like she is "loose" and is going to leak, or she has to take a dump afterward, etc. etc. The way it always starts is this. I enjoy eating her pussy and can get her to release that way. Great way, I think, to get her relaxed and in the mood for anal. Problem 1, she never wants to release from me eating her out, she keeps asking for my schlong in her vagina every time. Well, it's hard to refuse that, but at the same time it's frustrating because then I just release and then I don't get anal! OK, let's say I just ignore her request to fuck her pussy and keep eating her out until she releases. Then, she will ask if I want her to BJ me. Awfully hard to say no to that, but if I really ask for anal, let's say she agrees. Problem 2, I care an awful lot for her pleasure and don't want to hurt her, soooo . . . I get really nervous with all the lube and worrying about doing it right (when it's so hard to get to that point anyway). Usually she makes me wear a condom, which I think is really stupid and also detracts from my "mood". As a result, sometimes my schlong loses its hardness, which ends up defeating my whole purpose! I think we have two problems. First, she has her own "issues" but doesn't really want to tell me no. Second, I have my own issues that I get so nervous about hurting her that I defeat my own purpose. Any suggestions how to deal with these issues? I really love her but it gets kind of frustrating. Sometimes I think she should kind of put up with her "dislikes" a little bit to give me the pleasure I want. To tell the truth, sometimes I want to just tell her, "I want you to suck my cock until it is red hot, then turn around and I am going to fuck you in the ass because it is my turn tonight!" And then just DO IT! Then again, I might end up sleeping on the sofa. LOL Suggestions?
So you have been married to her for 20 years and you are still afraid to talk to her about sex? That should be your starting point. It sounds like you have everything you need except for a better idea of what she thinks of anal. None of us can tell you that one...
^^agreed, try talkingf about sex with yoru wife when you arent all turned on and horny.. .its hard to have an open an d frank discussion when you just wanna get inside of her, yknow? ask her whatn she thinks of anal. as for the making you wear a condom thing, i don tthink its dumb personally... i mean, tahts where shit comes out of, id rather have my bfs cock wrapped up before it goes in there, thanks
OK, that's fine, but my real question (inartfully put) was dealing with male performance anxiety, by which I mean getting kind of soft at precisely the wrong time! I hate it when that happens! So excited, then getting caught up in the details and worrying that I kind of lose some of that excitement. Surely some other male members have had to deal with this. . . . I have even seen some amateur videos in which the guy has the same problem I have!
then worry about the details ahead of time if you have too...although I would suggest just going with the flow...you should wear a condom when you have anal...to prevent any nasty weird infection etc... you should flat out ask her if she likes anal? wants to do it more? find out...just have her touch herself or something to keep you excited, get on all fours and spread her legs...whatever turns you on...have her talk dirty...don't worry so much..all guys get soft sometimes
Just turn her over and fuck the shit out of her. No more issue! If she bitches make her sleep on the sofa. That's just the way we do things here in New York
I think wearing a condom when fucking your wife is weird. As long as you don't stick it back in her mouth or pussy while your dick is dirty, there should be no problems.
yeah- a dirty sanchez is a good way to keep her from wanting to do it again, but that's another topic..
