Dear you,

Basically this thread is just pretending that you're writing a letter to someone saying something you really want to say to them but would never say to their face.

Example:

Dear you,

Stop making things so hard for me. You have no idea how much you're ruining my life, I hate you.

From me

 

Dear you,

You are both fucking idiots. Seriously. What the fuck? Oh, and your girlfriend is a total whore. She's also a jealous bitch.

From,
Me

 

Dear You

What the hell do you really want

from,
me?

 

Dear You,

Remind me to steal the last piece of chocolate your sister has 'hidden' in the fridge.

Love, Me

 

Dear you:



Thank you for the speeding ticket – I used it to light the pilot light on my furnace. I was delighted that you believed that my name was Rasmise and that I was from Jamaica. Also I was quite flatter that you believed that I was only 37 years old.



From that guy in the rented truck.

 

Dear Stalker:

It's been fun, but I don't have the time for games anymore. If you want to see me you're going to have to come to me now...otherwise I will just assume you were not sincere.

The Lady of the Tea Aisle

 

Dear you,
You're so fucking stupid, why are you getting mad at me now?? Why is it that you and all the other bitches get to run around yelling at me and as soon as I say anything to you, it's like the end of the world???? Can't you EVER be happy??? Is it really THAT impossible for you? Have you smiled even once in your whole damn life?

From The Girl That Never Does Anything Right.

 

dear you,

your an inconsiderate asshole. also a gayhole. your penis is small and mis-shapen, and it doesnt help that you dont know how to use it. you think you are deep but have the emotional depth of a fig newten. i will send you a douche bag in the mail.

From,
me

 

Thank you for the last batch of bureaucracy that forced the closure of the last cattle slaughter house on my Island. Now my meat has to be shipped in from the main land and as you know from my last income tax statement I will not be able to afford the increase to meat cost - caused by shipping expenses. So I am sure that you will understand that I started poaching. Cheers!

 

Dear You:

Please do your fucking dishes before I kill you.

 

Thank you for not subsidizing the local farmers in my area.

Also I would like to thank you for allowing that big Company from back east to buy out Island Farms and it’s affiliated Co-Ops.

Now that farm fresh dairy products are getting hard to find - and I will not shop at major food chains - my dairy product consumption will decrees. So I am sure my arteries will be clearing up in no time. Cheers!

 

Dear you:

You saved my life


-Yours

 

Dear you
Please stop smoking as soon as possible. You stink!
From me.

 

dear you,
you don't understand whats going on, and i don't expect you to, because i don't understand it myself. but i wish you would just try. you mean everything to me so i can't give up on you, i've got to take you with me when everything crashes. i'm just so afraid you'll be a slave.. you'll feel as if you HAVE to conform.. and you'll just give in. it's killing me inside to think about it. i love you so much i wish you would just listen and take the plan seriously. i wish everyone i loved would listen and take it seriously but for some reason i know you're the one who would understand the best if you just opened up your goddamned mind. i feel very alone because of you. i don't want to give you up, but i think i'm dragging down your own plans.. what you want out of life... maybe.. but i also feel like i could save you.. and that's powerful. i don't know what is real anymore, really, and i don't think you get it. i don't think anyone really does. i'm going to try to stand by you though as long as i can stand it because i can't feel alone and i need you for more reasons than just one. this is a crazy world, my love. i just wanna run away with you.
love, me.

 

Dear you,

I know we wont ever have a close relationship, I don't hate you, but I don't love you either. If I walked away from you now and never saw you again... I wouldn't miss you.

from
moi.

 

dear you,


just because your dad is the U.S. president doesn't mean i love you. the sex was ok, but it's over; leave me alone before i have to get a restraining order

 

way to go! you fucking ruined it for me!

geez!!!!!


*shakes head and walks away*

 

Dear you,
Every night, your twisted fucking logic persuades me to join you in reckless whisky fuelled mayhem. But I'm sick of seeing your bloodshot eyes and guilty stare in the mirror. Please stop.
From Me.

 

dear you,
i dont fucking care.
from,
me

 

Dear you,

Do me.

Love,

Me