Mildew smell and diabetes

I know a child that smells like mildew all of the time. He is diabetic. I do know that diabetes can make people smell "sweet" like fruit, or like alcohol even (rotting fruit). I have heard it described as acetone, but I do not know what that smells like.

I do not believe that it is the diabetes that makes him smell this way, but rather the fact that his mother does not force him to bathe properly. She has told me that when he takes a shower, he hides all the way in the back and barely gets wet at all. She does not have time to show him or monitor his bathing.

I work with many other people who have diabetes and my own grandfather did as well and none of these people smelled like mildew. This child's mother is diabetic and she does not smell like mildew.

I am just curious because my mother in law insists that this kid stinks because of his medical condition, and I insist it is because his mother is an idiot who doesn't show him how to wash properly.

He smells like wet laundry that you have forgotten to put in the dryer.

 

Unless they have him on some wacky meds that are coming through his pores (like the garlic smell from DMSO) there should be no reason for the mildew smell....the fruity smell usually comes about right before or during diabetic shock....which is why so many times diabetics are mistaken for alcoholics or just plain drunk when the police or EMS come across them having an episode.

 

That's interesting. I think it is likely mainly hygiene related, and probably in his hair. I and my boyfriend have both experienced that mildew smell if we don't dry our hair properly (going to bed with damp hair, for example). Oily build-up from improper washing exacerbates this. Hmm... How old is he? I went through a stage when I was younger when I really just hated taking a shower. The loud noise was the part I hated most of all. Perhaps he has a similar discomfort about showers and would do better in a bath. If a tub isn't available, a sponge bath. But of course that would require his mom to show him, so I don't know. OK, maybe a more drastic measure, but getting his hair cut really short (buzz-cut) could help with the mildew smell as well. Of course I know a good shower is all he probably needs, but just throwing suggestions out there.

Not to pry, but how can his mom not have time to show him how to shower properly? Isn't that required of being a mother? Is there anyone else who can teach him?

Ever smelled nail polish remover? That's what acetone smells like.

 

Thanks all.
My nail polish remover smells like strawberries. LOL or at least it is supposed to. That is why I wasn't sure. He doesn't smell like that though, he smells like old laundry or an old rotting shower curtain. It is definitely mildew that I smell.

As far as his age he is 8.5. I don't know why he doesn't like to shower, but I suspect it is honestly because no one has ever shown him. I really don't like to pass judgement, but I really need to talk about this because it is driving me fucking crazy.

His mother got pregnant with him when she was 17 and her now husband was 18 or 19. Anyway, she CLAIMS they planned it because she is diabetic and for some reason she believed that she couldn't have kids. I do not believe they planned it for one second, because I'm not stupid. Anyway, they got married had the kid. They had no money, no education (barely finished high school) and no one to really help them. They lived with their parents, but they didn't teach them how to care for the child. Obviously.

Anyway, they have never had any money and always been in debt because they are not wise with money decisions. That kinda isn't the point, but it adds to the puzzle and why I'm frustrated with the situation. Anyway, this child has other issues. He is deathly afraid of going to the bathroom by himself. And he would rather pee his pants than use the mens room. If he goes to the bathroom he has to have someone take him and he goes to the women's room which I personally think at that age is completely unacceptable. But his mother refuses to do anything about it, such as force him to use the mens room. And no I do not believe anything happened to him to make him fear this. I think he has been babied his entire life and not taught how to grow up. And his father refuses to interact with him. He goes to work at 5am comes home at 9pm and watches tv all night, without even speaking to the children at all.

He also has other problems, such as his speach problem. At least that is what his school calls it. I call it his mother allowing him to talk like a baby. He still says dada instead of daddy or dad or pop or whatever. Only babies say dada in my opinion. Plus, his teacher was asking him questions last night at his open house and he played like he was all shy. Well the teacher kept trying to get him to talk, and his mother got all mad, and thought the teacher was trying to make him look stupid. She most certainly was not. She was attempting to get the child to communicate like someone his age should. He talks in baby talk all of the time and it is annoying.

Lately he has been getting a smart mouth with his elders and his mother refuses to discipline him. She thinks it is funny when he tells me to shut up and tells me he is going to punch me in the face, etc. I don't find any humor in that.

There is also a 2 year old girl in the family too. She is most certainly not like this boy. She is extremely independent. The father of these kids is forcing his wife to have another child even though she does not want to. I don't think he rapes her or anything but he threw away her birth control pills that she was sneaking and taking. He threw away her migraine medicine. They can't afford to buy insulin for the kid or for the mom or her thyroid medicine, or blood pressure medicine so they just go without. Yet the husband wants to go out and buy a 25,000.00 truck because he thinks he looks stupid driving a car. (one that his wife bought and is paid in full).

Oh and the thing that pisses me off the most, is that the father REFUSES to give his son who is diabetic his insulin shot. Absolutely refuses. He wakes his wife up and makes her do it. She went out of town on business last year and he drove all the way to his mother's house and made her give the kid the shot. And it isn't because he is afraid. It is because he firmly believes that women tend to the children and he wants nothign to do with them other than keep knocking his wife up.

The husband has forbid her to be friends with a male co-worker of ours, and my boyfriend thinks I'm next on the hit list. My boyfriend doesn't like the guy either.

Anyway, this was all supposed to explain why the mother doesn't have time to teach him how to bathe. I guess she just doesn't understand that she is supposed to. My mom taught me what to do. If I had a kid I'd teach them how to do it. I don't know why she doesn't but I imagine she just doesn't know that she is supposed to teach him, and his father wants nothing to do with him so... he doesn't help with the kids. She gets in the bath with her daughter and I'm guessing she teaches her because her daughter doesn't smell like mildew.

That is why I wondered if it was the Diabetes. I mean that is what my boyfriend first said and that is what my boyfriend's mother said. Not that they have any experience with diabetes, I guess they just didn't want me to talk bad about the kid. But it isn't his fault his parents are idiots.

Btw, this girl is my friend. My only friend here. That is why I haven't said anything to her yet. I really want to, but I don't know how. There are so many issues going on that I want to talk to her about. But I don't think she will even listen to me. People think that because I don't have kids, that I have no idea what I'm talking about. I know one thing, kids aren't supposed to smell like mildew nor are they supposed to not ever bathe.

sorry so long guys.

 

It sounds to me like a classic case of too young of a mother and father....they are babies themselves. This isn't the old days were girls were taught to care for their younger sibs....even infants. And boys are not always taught "manly" things when they are growing up like how to be a good father....or maybe the child's father never had a strong father figure.

When it comes down to it....it is going to be up to them to seek help....they don't have to go to some shrink either....there are many parenting groups and courses out there....knowledge (it seems with both parenting and life in general) is what they need. You can offer to go with your friend and ask your bf if he is willing to push his personal feelings aside and offer some positive guidance to the father.

If children are not given a great start at an early age, it will be tougher....but all things can be turned around....it seems that poor socialization and a possibility of the child mimicking (sp?) the parents behavior at home may play a role.....all little boys should be able to (even want to) go to the men's room with Dad....or Mom....or alone at school (I remember going alone as early as 3 at nursery school without issue)....

I hope your friends decide to get some help....not just with the child, but with life in general. Your best bet is to be a positive, non-judgemental, supportive friend.....if you can calmly guide them to better decisions that would be the best.

 

I dont smell of mildew, or anything else unusual

That must be hygeine