spanking and such

physical punisment.... opinions

 

Lets see if I have this right, your a male aged 17 years, probably WITHOUT children, but yet your posting about disipline and spanking? I know this is a free board for the using, but your post sounds out of context with your living situation.

 

he has a right to post this. he wants to know both sides of it. I doubt he's all for physical punishment. At least he is researching this topic before having children. people are so fast to judge. May be he does have a child. He is old enough to physically reproduce.

 

or he's posting it in a forum that he knows will cause an uproar...

 

Either way, it doesn't hurt to educate, you know?

Let's look at physical punishment in a different scenario:
A husband and wife talk and decide that the wife shouldn't buy a new pair of shoes. They can't afford them, and she has 400 pairs of shoes already. The wife buys a new pair anyway. The husband finds out and slaps his wife. Is this considered abuse? Yes. Is this considered respectful? No. Are there lots of other ways this could have been resolved? Yes.

Now put it back into context:
A mom and child talk, and the mom tells the child that he cannot bring earthworms into the house. They are messy and daddy is really afraid of them. The child brings worms into the house anyway. The mom spanks the child.
Were there other ways this could have been resolved? Yes.
Was this disrespectful? Yes
Was this abusive?....Why is it any different to hit a child than to hit a woman, or to get into a bar brawl? Children deserve respect, encouragement, a firm consistent guidance, and most of all, love. Physical punishment is a pisspoor way to show love for someone. As evidenced by every woman that has left an abusive husband.

 

right on holly....that's a great way to put it into perspective....

 

Not to be rude, but there are about 100 threads with this subject matter.

 

imma be a daddy in 9 months

 

the way i view "spankings" is not at all tolerable. Explaining verbally to a child what they have done wrong is the way to go, also


understand to children are a lot smarter than we think they are .

I am a bear; when phrasing sentences try to use I before you. Because You is like your attacking the person but using "I" is like taking responsibility for what they have done. lil ones also explore with their eyes as well as their ears and its just so incrediable to see when i work with kids how they say "well when i was 1 yrs and 2 months old i remember when... Use positive reinforement as much as possible because you can only hold your baby for a certain amt of time till they eventually grow up.

take it easy and congrats

T

 

im not a parent and wont be for a while, but i was spanked as a kid and i can honestly say that its had no adverse affect on me whatsoever. i guess my relationship with my dad was effected, but that would have happened wether he got physical or not.
i think it just depends on how you do it. my dad is old school and the way he dealt with dicipline just rubbed me the wrong way and we rarely get along. whenever he had a problem with me or my bro, hed take away every priveledge he could think of. then i would get totaly outraged and he would yell and freak out and if i didnt take control of the the situation by leaving the room, i would get hit or pushed or my arm grabbed (he grabbed my neck once) and in some way hurt. it wasnt abuse and i never saw it that way, he was just really frustrated and didnt know what to do. the way he was raised was way worse.
now my moms spanked me a few times and when i got older, i received a few (very well deserved) smacks on the face but shes always been gentle and tried every possible way to work it out first. spanking me was always the very very last resort and i never held a grudge.
i doubt ill spank my kids, but if they behave anything like i did when i was 12 and 13, i dont know what i will do..

 

yea not enought kids are spanked now... I was and I was still a hellion... but if I wasnt it def. wouldve been worse... I wouldve hated to be my parents!!! Im sure I embaressed the hell out of them in public..... kids are goin wild these days

 

Ya sure-- there are lots of brats around these days, and I think a lot of them need to be tipped over and paddled. But slapping someone across the face is so unacceptable. A few swats on a baby's diapered bum I have no problem with.

 

What's a baby going to learn from being hit? That mommy/daddy=pain.

Hitting is abuse. Period.

BTW, I have never spanked my kids who are 4 and 8, and are more well behaved than most children...

 

I know sugrmag, spanking is such a controversial issue, that's why I try staying out of any group discussion regarding the issue. People just seem to get so worked up over it. I don't want that and just because something works in your home doesn't mean that everyone should have to abide by the same. I appreciate that you haven't spanked before. That is great.