What happen's when you just can't go back?

what happens when you been fucked over some many time's that

you start noticing a change in how you inter act with people, and even family.
being drawn, distant, and sometimes nasty.
I use to be a very nice , kind person, and here as of late, im
quiet, soft spoken, depressed, and non social. some people would just say
grow up and relax, and smoke something, but i was never into that, and sometimes i think i am my own worst enemy and i should just get rid of myself
cause the world dont want me.
ever have so much happen in a relationship,? no matter what it is..
friend, marriage, boyfriend,girlfriend, brother , sister, and you try to make it work out, but the past and your feelins just are so overwhelming, you can't trust that person no more. To much has happened and you cant go back and have a do over. Like that lonley dog in the pound who was abused, with his head down and his tail between his legs, scared that the next person who touches him will hurt him again?
My feelins exectly.

 

I smoke weed... but you said you arent into that. I would suggest meditation, to disconnect from your feelings as best you can, let go of yourself for 15 minutes a day, and your outlook on life can change a great deal.

 

I figure deep down – even a scared dog with its tail between its legs doesn’t truly want to be lonely and with a bit of kindness they will cautiously start trusting again. It is never to late to go back so I hope you soon go back to the nice kind person you were. Cheers!

 

and then its new owner will kick the shit out of it

 

EXECTLY....mY FEELINS EXECTLY
YOU WANT MY KINDNESS? EARN IT, RIGHT OR WRONG?

 

theoretically, you're right. but then again, i doubt that anyone's willing to go to that kind of effort, so sometimes you have to either give kindness to undeserving fucks or else just keep it to yourself, which is lonely as hell

 

true, i guess this life all all about getting swear, so oh well..lol

 

.

 

life is evil period

 

I may not the be the right person to give any sort of advice, but I remain optimistic there is someone out there worth my attentions and the same for you. I am hurt so much that sometimes it hardly seems worth it, but I must hold onto hope.

 

your problem is you take relationships way too seriously. sounds to me like you have let some asshole who wronged you take over your life and change you for the worst. that shit doesnt matter. people act like finding someone else is the most important thing in the world. it isnt. your talking about offing yourself cuz you got dumped? sounds like some emo high school shit to me. i dont mean to offend or insult you further, but just move on. in a few weeks that asshole wont even matter to you anymore.

 

It wasn't a boyfriend, im married and been married for awhile now,

the problem isn't my relationship, but those with (friends)
Im 27 and i don't act like a child, i was just asking some advice on,
why people are such pricks, and why isn't there any decent people in the world anymore, and maybe there is, but where the fuck are they? and why do i alway's get used by all the asshole's.. it is like im a maginent for assholeness..lol
But anyway, just my thoughts

 

have faith in yourself.