how is it that someone can make you still feel like crap after already breaking up? how is it that he can make it so that it feels like we have broken up 3 more times after already breaking for good? how is it that he can make me feel like everything is my fault after we had already broken up. how is it that someone can lie to your face like that? aghhhhhhh! relationships suck! i would much rather spend the rest of my life alone. thanks to him.
sometimes we get involved with people who dont appreciate us. it's better to stay away from them and move on. It's hard but it's necessary, for our own sake. getting involved with someone who makes your life miserable is not worth it. Love is beautiful, it's not pain and tears.... I've come to realise this too late but hey! life is like school, you learn even though you dont want to go.
because it was a sudden bereavement.. and unexpected.. n worse.. it's love and as much joy as it can bring u.. it can cause a similar amount of pain.. to love is to be vulnerable.. n yet it is because u're vulnerable that u open yourself up to the most glorious joy.. and unfortunately.. pain when it all goes wrong. if it's any consolation the pain will pass and u will love again.. but yes the immediate aftermath can be painful.
Generally it's because they need to find a way to pick themselves up. Sometimes they are so at fault that they lie to themselves and thus lie to everyone else around them. You just have to be strong through it and thankful that you were shown their true colors before getting more involved with them.
yea, i know the pain will pass. it is just having to wait it out. it would have gone a lot better if he didn't make me feel so horribly. it sucks having someone telling you everything is your fault, and i caused this and that, and making me second guess myself. and other worse things that i choose not to mention.
'Love' is a very powerful feeling and sadly there are some people that can't understand its significance. My ex was very manipulative in this way, perhaps she didn't understand enough about 'love', or perhaps she did and was simply using emotions as a weapon or something. The feeling will fade, if he's hurt you emotionally, you shouldn't give him the time of day really. Hang out with your friends, visit your family, read a book, take a trip to Antartica, just move on and before you know it you'll feel like a whole new person.
I empathize, Tfou, and think that the reasoning behind ex's that do that is pretty much what pandiebear said. I've a question for you, though; did your ex exhibit this same behavior when you were together? Especially in a fight... would he always twist everything into being your fault?
whenever we fought he would apologize and this and that and tell me he wanted things to work out. but if it was a bad fight, and i really didn't see it working out too soon, he would start blaming me for everything, telling me that i am this and that, or just saying some crazy shit to try and make me stay with him. so yea, i knew that he was like this. this time is just worse and he made me feel like a fool. but now he wants things to work out. i don't understand him or his moods. he is making me crazy, and i don't want to put up with it anymore.
I'd probably cut all contact off with him, then. I don't know your story well enough to really give the worlds best advice, but if you already want out, and he's given to mood changes of a black and white nature; I'd RUN! What you described is awefully close to "gaslighting". It's defined as this: The other person may deny that certain events occurred or that certain things were said. You know differently. The other person may deny your perceptions, memory and very sanity. Over a given period of time, this can really mess with your self esteem. It did for me, that's for sure! Take care
that's what everyone has told me i haven't listened yet. i guess i really need to, but everytime i try to run, i give in to him. he knows what to say to make me stay. i know he loves me, which is why i guess i stayed for so long, but it is just not good anymore. i am miserable. he is now acting like we are back together again when we are not. so this is just going to lead to another horrible confrontation when i tell him to leave me be because it will never work. i know he is crazy. one argument got so bad that he told me he wanted to kill me (then he apologized right away). i know i need to run, i just haven't found the strength to do it yet . i can't keep subjecting myself to all this pain and insanity.
I feel for ya girl, but if you've dealt with it once... you can do it one last time, right? So tell him it's over, not to call, not to come by; nothing. Then avoid him like the plague.... That would be the quickest road to recovery; but I know it's hard... I wish I had done it that way myself lol ... but then, I finally did and now I'm all
