Haven't been to the doc in 4 years..

(sorry for the long fucking ramblings)

Well I just can't make myself go, lots of people have this problem. It's a hassle and it's creepy and I need some good advice for shit. My problem is I hate griping about my pains and shit, I feel like i'm running to mommy. Anyways I'm completely fucking unhealthy and it's time for me to stop thinking about it and actually do something. Who hasn't been there?

I live a hectic lifestyle which is my fault, I have various mental and emotional problems because I have a chemical imbalance and you know I'm starting to feeling like I'm losing my grip. I don't want to go back to constant check ups and pills and sessions because there is never a break from it and it seems like a lot of non-sense. I've gained about 20lbs since december and trust me it is a lot. I'm 5'3 and now about 50 pounds over my ideal weight. I got stetch marks when I was 13 and those have mostly faded, but now I'm getting more. I'm back to my teen body, which is sad because I was doing so well with myself.

It's very hard for me to keep routines, because I also have ADD and I can never keep my mind made up. I need to diet, and exersice and figure out how to manage living healthy forever without getting bored and saying fuck it. I mean everyone has the obvious answer to losing weight but how the fuck do you train you mind to be so orginized.

And I mean not only that I can't keep a job I've had over 20 jobs, each no longer than 3 months. I can't deal with the everything being the same. I mean I love working it keeps my mind busy but when I know everything nothing is changing and it's not going to why would I settle with that... I know why for the money and security but I can't torture my head with the complete lack of fun, or learning, you know anything.


You know I feel so stupid, really. I'm looking down at my gut thinking my head got me into it, or rather it onto me so how do I train my mind so focusing on what I really need to do, to get my life on track. I know I've gripped a lot right now so wow if you read it all but really any advice on anyone one thing or anyother would be fantastic because I feel like I'm forgeting the reason, the meaning, starting not to care.

luv ya all

 

I recommend joining www.thebestdayever.com and listening to some of the interviews there...That site has become my "doctor", for anxiety, depression, and whatever else you can possibly imagine.

 

i haven't been to a doctor since 1995 except to get a TB test for a job...and i think that's a good thing.

 

Stay away from alcoholic beverages, salt, & sugar. guzzle much water.

 

eat lots of fruits and veggies

stay away from processed foods

you'll be fine

 

Switch from animal protein to beans and whole grains, nuts and seeds. Google Dr. Andrew Weil. Kick the junk food, alcohol, caffiene, tobacco and pot(causes fat inducing munchies). Latch on to some artistic or academic passion and go for it. Find something fun to do that burns calories like sports, biking, dancing.
Best wishes
CL