There's a girl at work who I've admired for a very long time but never thought I would have a chance with her. As it turned out about 3 weeks ago, she has an interest in me ... much to my surprise! So we were texting/ringing/I.M'ing each other (a LOT!) for about a week and I asked her on a date, she accepted, we had a great time. Another few days pass (I see her regularly at work in this time ... lots of chatting/flirting) and she invites me to a house party. We had a good time and at the end of the night, we did end up having sex and it seemed good. I left the next morning thinking things were going well. She texted me the next day as normal but the next day up until now (a week later), I've not heard a THING from her. She won't reply to texts, won't answer the phone and hasn't been into work. I know that she's going through some problems at the moment. I've spoken to a couple of her friends who, just like me, weren't getting calls returned for a couple of days but they have done since. They say she's 'run down' and isn't herself, which considering what she told me, is understandable (she's going through a big custody battle with her ex over her daughter). But I feel confused because she's completely cut me off and not offered an explanation. Is it because she's run down? Is it because we had sex? Is it because she doesn't like me? I don't know what to think. Should I just forget about her? I just don't believe that being run down us an excuse for blatant ingnorance.
I say chill and give her some time and space. It has nothing to do with you. You just happened upon her at this time. If things are meant to be, then she will sort out her problems and you two will move forward. But in all honesty, you sound clingy/needy. I mean you two weren't a couple, you had sex after a party. She doesn't exactly owe you anything at this point. Basically, (and of course this is only my opinion as I'm sure others will disagree) you have no reason to be this worried about it. Sure I understand you want to be sure she is ok, but it sounds to me like you are more worried if she cares for you as you do for her. It just sounds like you are looking for a bunch of reassurance. And if she has some other personal issues, she might not be able to give you what you need right now. I know to most people I come across as harsh and cynical, but I just call em like I see em. And from what you have stated this is just my opinion. Take it or leave it.
Well, no sooner had I posted this thread, I got in touch with her over MSN. She told me that she's been going through a bit of a mental breakdown and explained a few things. But I told her that I was a bit worried over the past week that I might have said or done something that had made her choose to ignore me. She seemed a bit pissed off that I'd thought that and then went offline with even saying goodbye ... perhaps I shouldn't have said that considering she's got enough to worry about. It wasn't the best of conversations but I guess I know where I stand now which, for me, is a slight relief. I've sent her an e-mail saying that I'm gonna back off (not as a friend ... just with the flirting etc) for now and if she wants to talk to me, she knows where I am. Maybe she'll be a little sore with me for a few days but she knows the score. Oh, and I don't think I'm being clingy or needy ... it's just when someone leads me on constantly for two weeks and then suddenly drops off the face of the earth, so to speak, i can't help but wonder why.
look if her reasons were truth she wouldn't be avoiding you. she would at least call you and say i'm having a rough time blah lbah blah, but becasue she hasn't even attempted to try and contact you i say she just wanted to fuck and now she maybe embarrased becasue she may have been drunk.but either way you cannot force her to respond so i personally would go on and if you run into her just ignore her and when she asks why your ignoring her say how does it feel?i hate when people can't come correct after incidences like this.it's pathetic for someone to treat you that way i mean damn she was comfortable enough to fuck you but not enough to keep in touch with you.no matter how busy or how stressed out someone is you should make an honest attempt to return the call.now she just looks like a slut.
shes going through an incredibly rough time and it probablysounded to her like you were making it about you - what did you do wron, how can you fix it, why wasnt she talking to you. either that or the sex sucked
