Hearin' sweet sounds of nature relaxin' under the sun. The shade of the willow is too common of an escape and you'd find me too easily there, so look for me near the stream. Once you find me we'll encounter barefoot adventures that seem endless. A simple blow of the wind will take all our worries away leaving us with carefree footsteps on the inviting green grass. We'll find tranquility within & with one another as you & i will walk hand in hand and slip away to another day. it probably needs a lot of work! i've changed it around a couple of times. feel free to share your feelings [but try not being too harsh please]
what you think of this? I liked the one you wrote too.. but you asked if anyone else had any other idea's..here is mine. enjoy..and keep writing , it is great Hearin' sweet sounds of nature relaxin' under the sun. Another day relaxing, Another time has come The shade of the willow is too common of an escape and you'll be sure to find me there, so look for me near the stream For the time being Once you find me we'll encounter barefoot adventures that seem endless. A simple blow of the wind will take all our worries away leaving us with carefree footsteps on the inviting green grass. We'll find tranquility within thee & with one another as you & i will walk hand in hand and slip away to another day.
yes yes i like it! & thanks everyone for the very nice comments.| would you mind if i wrote a side note of your suggestions?
I really enjoyed this piece. It made me think of this place I used to go. It's in the middle of the woods in Bethel, NY. It's so beautiful there. You placed me there with your words. Keep writing. I'm looking forward to reading more.
