First Time at a Gay Bar

So, as some of you may know, I came out to a friend back in February and since then I've told a few others. On Tuesday (June 5) I ventured out (pun intended) to a gay bar for the first time.

I had been extremely nervous about going alone so I asked my friend if he'd go with me, kind of as support. He's straight and I wasn't sure if he'd be comfortable about it but it turned out he was. I chose Tuesday because I wanted a slower night so I wasn't overwhelmed. That and I'm not much into the type of music that they normally play there on the busier nights.

So, I meet my buddy downtown and we head to the bar, getting ever more nervous as we get closer. We walk in and it was virtually empty. The bartender, the owners enjoying a drink on the patio, and a handful of patrons. Me and my buddy sat down, had a drink and talked a bit, then shot some pool. We met a guy, we'll call him Mike. Anyways, we decided to leave because we both had some stuff to do later that night. On the way to catch the bus I suggested that we check out one other bar on the way to the bus stop.

So, we popped in, had a drink and shortly after, Mike showed up and he ordered a drink and wanted to know if we wanted to have a seat and chit-chat a bit. We said sure. We talked about all sorts of stuff and eventually he decided to show me around the place and introduce me to a few of the regulars. This place was much busier than the other. We played a bit of pool and Mike's buddy, let's call him John, took an interest in me.

My self esteem has never been the greatest and it bolstered my confidence immensely when he told me that he thought I was hot. Long story short, we stayed out much later than we expected and I was virtually hanging onto John all night. I even got a little tongue action although I think if I had limited my drinking that night my boundries would have been a little clearer. It felt good though to just be able to cuddle, hold hands, etc. John actually isn't my type but I still enjoyed hanging out with him and just being able to relax in his arms.

All in all, I had a great first experience. My friend, whom I was worried would be uncomfortable the whole time had a fun time too. I was worried guys would be hitting on him and pinching his ass but it never happened despite being an attractive guy. I guess they figured he was off-limits once they found out he was straight. They were still inclusive though when we talked.

Anyway, sorry to drag on with another story. I just thought I'd share it with all of you and open of the floor to anyone elses experiences with gay bars.

Does anyone have any tips, suggestions, or just some general guidelines to follow at gay bars?

Thanks for reading.
Ian


Edit: By "tongue-action" I mean kissing. Nothing below the belt happened

 

I've only been to one gay bar. Since I'm underage I usually go to regular bars that most of my friends go to.

When I went to the gay bar I had a fun time. I went with my boyfriend, a straight friend and another gay friend. It was a good time.

 

comgratulations

here are my tips

enjoy it the early days of going to gay bars are very special
trust your gut instinct if it doesn't feel right don't leave with a gay and always practice safer sex, but above all enjoy yourself!
S

 

Tips: DOnt let yourself seem to accessbile. It will open you up to more predatory types. Try and always have a friend with you so you dont leave your comfort zone. Don't take drinks from strangers..god know what some may slip into them. And as said before..YEs..always be safe above all! Respect yourself!

 

glad you had fun though wierd that you was making out with dudes not your type though..prob not always the smartest thing to do.

 

but completely understandable it was his first time out in a gay scene, possibly the first time he's experinced any effection from another man
S

 

Exactly. Aside from a little exploration with another boy when I was much younger (like 11 years old) this was the first time I have ever experienced any affection from another guy. For the most part it was just holding hands, cuddling a bit and the odd kiss on the cheek and finally a parting kiss on the lips before I left.


One other thing I found kind of surreal was that some of the guys (or what appeared to be guys) were using the women's washroom and some of the women (or what appeared to be women) were using the men's washroom. Not that I have a problem with it but I've just never seen that before. :tongue:

Oh yeah, we also played a lot of pool. They had free pool and so aside from sitting around and talking, that's mainly what we did.

 

You guys sound a lot more adventerous than me. I always maintain some kind of level of reservation..especially when it comes to the unknown at first.

 

here's a tip that i learnt off Hollyoaks, a British soap opera.

when going to a gay bar, never allow your mother and sisters to come with you!

evidence: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RO7eBLSmc68

the dark haired sister (Mercedes - i know, odd name) is acting like a complete homophobe,
the blonde sister (Carmel) is dancing around wanting to be in Charlies Angels and wants to know the difference between a lipstick lesbian and a fag hag...
and the mother (Myra) is trying to find him a man.

all this while John Paul wants a quiet night out to see what a gar bar is like with his straight friend Russ (dark hair, buzz cut, engaged to Mercedes).

*yes, i am quite a massive fan of Hollyoaks and the whole McQueen clan*

enjoy the clip (and yes, i've been told the acting is not that good in Hollyoaks, but i refuse to believe them)

 

I seriously don't get gay dudes who take their families to gay bars. I mean, that's just not normal behaviour, whether you're gay or straight.