Guys....Crushes and Just a Little Bit of Internet Porn

hi, am nineteen and have left school - I am Gay! and have never had a boyfriend which is kinda sad! well yeah it is ....... but I have had this whole crush on a cute guy for two years now ....where friends .... or were but not really now out of the umbrella of school ..... I have admitted to him I like him a lot (plutonically) he doesnt know i wann fuck him till he's tired shitless..........but I mean I had a total crush.....fantasizing, lumps in throat when he is around......wanting his sex/his smell/his lips etc...................anyway I drink (like a lot for a long time am not in US) SO drinking laws are 18 ......... I drink tonnes and a relive what could have been and I can't get away from the damaging merry go wheel (metaphorically speaking) ........ I have been embarssing on msn etc and a dont know If I should feel completely ashamed of being like this and sort of going OTT about saying I like him and make such an effort! or whether this is good to do???????????? I know the best way is to get a new guy or at least a guy who likes cock and also I know (weirdly and rather perplexing) he is prejudice about Gay people etc which makes me think that what the HELL am I doing??? two years on this motherfucker? but I cannot forget about him? I cant move on! do you think there is something wrong with me why cant I do whatevery other Joe does and move on/get a stable job/ get a partner that wants my sex etc..........I can't do any of those things and it is drviing me crazy/////////////////////............aaaaarrrrrggggghhhhhhhhh what can I do?

 

lol It sounds like you are a lil crazy yes. If someone isn't gay. They aren't gay. You have to face that and move on! You keep pursuing it..It will get very ugly and not end well I can assure you. Straight is Straight no matter how much we dont want to believe that at times. A leapord does not change thier spots.

 

What if a straight person was behaving in that manner toward you..how would you react..would you give into it. Of course not! Ya have to be rational in these things.