Well speaking of welfare.....

You didn't do anything wrong, and I don't deserve an apology. I just want to have an honest exchange ideas without people being too offended.

 

I really appreciate you coming back with this one.

In some ways your are right and in other ways we see through different eyes. My Mr. Nut and I decided we would raise our own family. He has awesome skills and it only makes sense for him to be the one working. I have excellent parenting skills. I am giving my children the best gift I know how, being home with them, raising them myself.

My lil' nuts are young. It doesn't mean it will always be like this for me. One day I will be able to venture out and make something else of myself. Today I chose this.

Sometimes I do feel like I can't exist without my man. I really don't want to. We make an awesome pair.

You can talk to me about anything Bacchus. I will try and really listen to your point instead of getting excited about it.

 

You're Mr. Nut is one lucky dude.

Thank you for your civility in the face of my attitude. VERY big of you.


I can see your point, I also am working in a relationship where we are kinda doing our best to fit the roles that need to be filled. Like, I work full time and don't go to school, she works part time and goes to school. When she finishes school, I will go back. So I can dig it.

I have a prejudice against breeders, I think. That must be why I get so heated about this subject.

I also fancy myself a feminist (raised by strippers, no dad), so maybe a skewed feminism, but still heartfelt.

Do you ever get scared that the time you've put into the "whole deal", will be for not, if your partner decides to bail? I guess that's not much of a possibility for you, kids and all, but that sounds like even more of a liability, I'm glad I'm fixed.

 

i stay home with my daughter, too. dave and i made a pact when we decided to have a child. i didn't want my daughter being a latch-key kid like i was. since dave's technical job pays far more than anything can get, he works, i stay home. i've worked consistently since i was 17, my jobs were always very good. i'm educated, i'm perfectly capable of survival. but for as long as i can raise my own child instead of leaving her to someone else to raise, i will do so. i lived for 26 years without my man, i would continue to do so if he were gone. there's also the comforting fact taht dave has a very good insurance policy on himself to provide me and kai if he should die or suffer a crippling accident. it would buy me enough time to get on my feet again. i'm shocked how many people don't do this.


and as for your statement bacchus, a nice way to say it would have been :

are you not worried about what you would do if he were no longer able to support your family? have you considered night classes to establish a potential carreer? that way you wouldn't be left without options and a future.

see how easy that is?

 

Oh, you girls are just good at that stuff.

 

Well, I am fixed too. I never worry about him bailing. I knew when we got married it would be forever. If you knew him you would know he isn't going anywhere. Plus, I do my best to make him happy and in return I am very happy.

You know it's funny. All the time I have put into raising our boys, he does too by the way when he is home, I have already reaped tons of rewards. My lil' boy at the age of 2 1/2 came over to me one day and told me I was doing a good job. How would he have ever thought to say such a thing? Both my boys say beautiful things to me. The other day I was getting my haircut and my 3 year old in the middle of the salon said "Mommy, your so beautiful". Those lil' boys are my treasures.

You know I am wrong for saying this because I don't want to make an excuse for my behavior earlier but I have had a really hard time this morning with the situation going on in Russia. I have to go put my lil' boy on the bus and I don't want to let him go. My heart is being ripped out of me at the moment worrrying about those children and their families.
Anyhoot, I just felt like I should say that so my attitude is a lil' more understood.

I am sorry you were raised in the enviroment you grew up. I can understand why that would be hard/challenging for someone on some of these issues we discuss. Not saying it is hard for you but like you said earlier you have a hard time stating you views sometimes.

 

I honestly don't have any idea what you're apologizing for. I haven't seen anything but acceptance, understanding and curiosity from your side. Kudos.

I'm not sorry for my upbringing, I'm actually very glad, that I wasn't raised like other people, it helps me define my own brand of perception.

So thanks for sharing your life with me. Thanks for your tolerance and honesty. Thanks for your time and input. Very much appreciated.