I want dreads!!

I want dreads but my mum won't let me because of my religion. It's considers wrong or something. I really want them and I can't express my freedom because of the moronic thing we call religion. I don't want to be in my religion but I'm not allowed to say that and I fear that 4 more years in the situation will turn out with my death. What do I do? All I want is freedom from an oppresive family, my brother got out, can't I?

 

What religion?

 

Jw

 

I see. Your parents sound like very controlling people. Some people can't grasp the fact that just because you're their offspring they don't own you. They can't make you believe in something if you don't believe in it. Just grit your teeth till 18, then do whatever you want.

 

Be patient. We spend our lifetimes becoming and this experience will give you patience and strength of character you will later need. Without a little adversity most of us would be fat and lazy. Power and love are in the desire, not the attainment of goals, that is the celebration and celebrating doesn't often strengthen you. Besides, the dreads won't make you anything. What you say and do makes you who you are.

 

Matisyahu is a Jew, and he used to have dreadlocks,........then he cut them off and became an Orthodox Hassidic Jew (I think that's correct)....tell that to your parents.

 

Rob:: You don't become Hasidic. You are born to it.
As for dreads, its a matter of hygene which Jews hold in high regards of their faith.
At this point in time dreads are considered cool and making a statement. But really, having dead hair wound up in braids is very unclean. I know I'll get some argument saying how those of you with dreads wash their hair all the time.
All in all its still a bunch of dead hair your carrying around with you....Dennis

 

Alaskan thanks for the correction.....I guess he was Hassidic all along then huh?

As far as locks being dirty, I agree you are carrying around a bunch of dead hair, but that dead hair can be clean if you take care of your locks.......I guess it's all a matter of perception and what you consider "dirty". Dreadlocks are a long term commitment, everybody and their brother wants locks at some point in time but i'd venture to guess the vast majority of them are doing it to attain some type of social stereotype, and then they get frustrated when their hair doesn't lock up as quickly as they like, some do stupid things like putting wax in their hair, rubberbands, all types of "accelerators", root rubbing and obsessive palmrolling (both of which cause breakage) and inevitably these people get impatient and cut it all off before it has a chance to really lock up. Dreadlocks take patience, and ALOT of time......it can take years for locks to mature. Alot of people backcomb because they think that gives them locks, in reality backcombing only allows you control over how your hair locks up, and does nothing to speed up the process....it just gives you a head of faux dreads so your hair doesn't look quite so messy while it locks up, even backcombed locks will usually unravel and lock up the way they want on their own. I for one am getting weary of people wanting locks and then looking for any and everything they can do to force them to lock up faster because they have no patience, then they cut their hair or embark on some tedious brushing/conditioning mission to remove what little progress they've made. Bottomline unless your willing to commit to dreadlocks long-term, good and bad, then it's probably not for you. I don't know what to tell you about your parents, you are quite young, and if they provide your necessities, you really have no choice than to allow them to dictate your choices to you, it sucks but that's the way it is until you start taking care of yourself.

 

Dennis I have to comment While I agree that most people who want dreadlocks or have young dreadlocks do it to be cool or make a statement, I have to say that statement isn't apt for everyone. I have dreadlocks and I don't have them to be "cool" or make a statement, it's part of my personal philosophy and spirituality not to partake in puritanical ideas of vanity, I spend alot of time in nature, it's totally a spiritual choice and an outward extension of how I feel inside, however I don't feel that i'm making a statement because most of the time I keep them covered up when out in society, I don't flaunt 'em because I do not want to be linked to any sociological stereotypes, therefore I feel that unless people know me and what i'm about, i'd rather not draw attention to myself.

 

jehovah's witness, right?

that one's a toughie. the problem is, they're still feeding you, housing you, and providing for you. you pretty much have to go along with it. then when you're 18 (or 17) or however old you need to be to legally be an adult and move out, then do it.

 

Brainstew: Thought you just left the "E" out of Jew.
Jehovah's Witness ? Wow that does open another can of worms. Guess your folks could get pretty upset with you at the fact you communicating with us "wordly people"

 

Please don't say you folks, I hate religion and I do not associate myself with one but my mother does hold me to being Jehovah Whittness and I do not have a problem talking to anyone. Even if I was JW, I am an individual, not a group of moany people who "hate to talk to worldy people."

 

You're pretty cool. Just don't let anyone grind you down, and you'll turn out fine

 

Alaskan -
dead hair does not = dirty.

ALL hair is dead...even your hair. The hair that is growing out of your head is dead.

 

only thing i can add to this conv is that ...
most folks want there younguns to be fine upstanding citizens, some faiths more so than others....n to many folks out there as alaskan stated associate the dreads with dirty , scummy unkept ppl that dont BELONG in there society or there ideals of what society is...

I'll never forget the year i came home (i was 14) from wrestling and had me a mohawk....my mom cried n cried about what i had done to myself n then promptly kicked my ass for doin such a thing... of course.. it was my rebellion a thte time so i did horrible things to my heado f hair any chance i got... i tried the art palette thing,,, the only thing i can control thing... none of which worked,,,,
dreads are a long term thing,,, too many ppl do get them just to be kewl or fit in or some to make themself standout ... whatever the reasonyer still under there roof for the time being.... so in the mean time let your locks grow and stay within the guidelines they have for you for the time being and then when you reach legal age decide from there what it is you want ... after another four years think of the locks you could potentially have .... n then if you choose something else to do with your hair its all right there....

 

I wonder if people know that being too clean is dangerous. You body cannot build and immunity to diseases.

As to the original post...just hang in there till your are 18.

 

oh i see jewish?well here you go, dreadlocks are associated with black people because the islanders mostly have dreadlocks, and i'm sure your parents don't want their little boy DRESSING, ACTING AND MOST OF ALL LOOKING LIKE A BLACK PERSON.unfortunatley they will probably never change their ideals don't let them rub those ideals onto you and wait it out, let your hair keep growing and when the time is right dread it out.

 

lol I'm Jehovah's Whittness and I am part black lol

 

if you just went out and did it would they kick you out of the house or anything? im going to get dreads soon ive told my mother but she shreeks in horror every time i mention it but i know she wouldn't kick me out or anything like that. if they would kick you out the house or tie you down and shave off your hair (this actually happens to some people) or anything like that then i guess its not worth it... but dont give up, never give up they still dont have the right to control you like this... you never know you might actually change there mind.

 

First off, why do you want these dreads again? Are you interested in them because you know they'll tick off your parents? Consider what you would do if your parents gave you freedom to do anything you want. Would you really still want them? Do you think you're mature enough to make these kind of decisions on your own? It could be partially because of religion, but there are other factors which weigh into their decision. I wouldn't take my daughter seriously if I knew she'd posted about this "problem" to a group of semi-anonymous strangers on the internet about it, in fact that might seal the deal.

You are not going to die. Your parents have your best interests at heart, they are trying to look out for you. You might not appreciate it now because you aren't a parent yourself yet, but they are doing the best they can. You also haven't said anything about abuse: either physical, mental, or emotional. Nobody can force you to believe their religion, or attend the services if you choose not to. But if you are avoiding your religion out of shame, or fear, or peer pressure, that isn't the best option, another thing you'll realize when you get older.

One more thing: You said, "my mother does hold me to being a Jehovah Whittness"..
No matter what she does, if you don't serve your god in your heart, nobody can hold you to being part of that religion. Your god does not view you as a "witness", a friend, or a worshiper unless you are being one. You've made a decision already, or you are very close to it. Communicating with worldly people?? You are one, join the club.

Believe me, you're already "free".