Ive tried everything! Someone Help!

Okay, so I have tried a good amount of things, postions, etc to help me orgasm. I have taken it in the ass, oral, so many things so many times. However, it seems no matter what I or my partner does, I cant get off.

I have never once had a real orgasm. I have faked it many times so my bf doesnt get pissed.

Heres the thing, Ive been with this guy almost a year and I would try anything with him, I am totally comfortable around him. But I dont know how to tell him I have been faking

I think part of it is that he cant ever last very long, like 20 minutes tops, and my boyfriend before him was the same way.

Any ideas on what to try?

I want an orgasm damnit!

 

As hard as it sounds, being honest is ost likely the best thing to do. I know it's scary no matter what, but if you really are comfortable with him it won't be as bad as it seems. You have a right to exeperience fulfilling sex, and if your partner respects you, he will be patient and understanding. Also, it isn't as if there's a law saying that you must have an orgasm during actual technical sex. It can be before or after. If you gradually work up to it that way, it should take some pressure off of the situation because there will not be such a strict time limit on when it feels like you should have your orgasm. Also, it will give you a better idea of what you like and what helps you along. Then you can put those into use during sex. And the best way to learn things often is: practice, practice, practice.

 

we have sex like every other day, and what we do during sex changes alot. very few things turn me on, and i have to subconsciously think about it to even make myself wet. ugh its hard

 

if you were "totally comfortable around him" you would never have felt the need to fake it

most women experience their first orgasm from masturbation. how can you expect someone else to know what buttons to push and how to get you there if you cant even do it yourself? fantasy and masturbation are good for you

 

Well thats just it. I am completely comfortable around him...now.

When we first started having sex I was not. And he made a comment to me about how I rarely got wet and how I never got off.

So the next time we did I faked it, and I just kept faking when I felt like I would have one naturally. And I never really stopped faking it, for fear he would be pissed off or someting.

So even tho I enjoy sex and everything, I dont want him to stop having sex with me just because I lied originally.

O and I have never been able to get myself off masturbating. I dont know why. Ugh it sucks

 

Flyflyaway - I am the g spot master. Check out my posts on the subject in the masturbation forumand elsewhere. You will orgasm if it is done right to you.

 

so i looked for your posts cutted....

but i didnt see em

i dont know gimme the link

 

I think I need to be able to get myself off before he can lol.

And you are right, I need to tell him.

So I am going to. Tomoro morning when he gets off work (he works nights).

It should be an interesting conversation...any ideas how to bring up the subject or how to tel him?

 

Good job. It depends on his personality as far as how to bring it up. Often simple is good. In a private, calm moment, when you are both in a good mood, bring the subject up. Just be honest, not just about the orgasm experience, but also about how difficult it is for you to tell him. Just saying something like.."This is really hard for me to say, but I have to tell you something about our sex life." Then follow it up quickly with the truth. Feel free to pm me or contact me on aim. As I said, I know it's difficult, so if you need moral support, or just to talk, I'm online.

 

what feral said, or you could tell him youre starting to masturbate a lot more, if he asks why say youd like to experience an orgasm and you dont think youve ever had a real, full blown one

 

FlyFlyAway - here is how to do it ---

1. Lie on your back, pillow under your butt, legs spread wide.

2. Have him lie on his back between your legs.

3. Have him insert his index and middle fingers (clean, nails trimmed, well lubricated) into your vagina, palm up, about two to three inches.

4. Have him feel the underside of your pubic bone (the upper wall of your vagina) for a small raised mound in the "12 o'clock" position.

5. Tell him when he has found it, and have him move his fingers in a "come hither" movement. Tell him to go left or right until he locates it - he may not be able to tell what is the best place. Communicate.

6. Sometimes have him move his fingers in and out of your vagina in a twisting motion.

7. Have him stimulate your g spot for 10 to 15 minutes, and you will get an orgasm. You might stimulate your clitoris while he is doing this, and you may get a double orgasm.

Let me know how it goes.

---The g spot master sayeth.

 

fly, have you masturbated together? I imagine you orgasm when you masturbate. Just start talking about how sexy you feel, and that you're horny, and let him watch you. Maybe, just maybe, he'll see what gets you hot and that might help.

 

FlyFlyAway - here is how to do it ---

1. Lie on your back, pillow under your butt, legs spread wide.

2. Have him lie on his back between your legs.

3. Have him insert his index and middle fingers (clean, nails trimmed, well lubricated) into your vagina, palm up, about two to three inches.

4. Have him feel the underside of your pubic bone (the upper wall of your vagina) for a small raised mound in the "12 o'clock" position.

5. Tell him when he has found it, and have him move his fingers in a "come hither" movement. Tell him to go left or right until he locates it - he may not be able to tell what is the best place. Communicate.

6. Sometimes have him move his fingers in and out of your vagina in a twisting motion.

7. Have him stimulate your g spot for 10 to 15 minutes, and you will get an orgasm. You might stimulate your clitoris while he is doing this, and you may get a double orgasm.

Let me know how it goes.

ok mr orgasm master!!! aka cutted, here you are then in your request for how it goes, we have been trying to do this for a long time now and he follows what you suggest exactly, but still nothing happens at all ever, and the only thing i feel is discomfort. so
how the hell can i tell him when he finds it, i dont even know myself!!! he s looked and looked etc , just how big can a vagina be? lol theres nothing there, or if there is what the heck should it feel like to me being on the receiving end then? none of it feels "great" what ever that might be, i just dont know.

10 - 15 mins! bloody hell hes been in there doing this for hours looking for something and still nothing goes on, i just get tthis huge painful need to pee to the point where it feels like i got a bowling balll for a bladder and driving on a bumpy road or been kicked there, it hurts that much for me.

 

yep, gspot stimulation doesnt feel good at all to me, despite cutted posting left right and centre about how great it is, but i do cum from clitoral stimulatio n(from tongue or vibrator). but to the OP, i still think its important that -YOU- figure out how to orgasm on your own because if you dont know how to turnm yourself on you cant reasonably expect someone else to just get it for you

 

Dark Angel and Allonym = All I can say it the technique has worked on many women - I can testify from personal experience. It may be that your g spot is not as well developed as other women, or that there is something in your mind which prevents you from letting loose. Or the comunication between you and your partner was not good enough to achieve g spot orgasm.

Your bladder feels pumped up because that is where the g spot is - near the bladder.

Try again.

 

taking advice from some1 named after theyre dick..uhhuh..
the problem isnt really in her or in technique or anything its in the connection
well not so much with darkangel..weve talked alot
the op ..i agree that you needto 1st get there yourself & know what it takes..
i think your more used to your bf but ya never been confortable & stillarent
otherwise yad tell him when ya can and cant & be honnest
not every1 cums easily, but even some whove never cum, might with just the right lover..
many women cum theyre 1st time with a woman or..only by...some..very very few men can make these women cum.. not suggesting only explsining reality..
& its a touch.. a being un tune with eachother.. & u sound like sex is something happening to you not something your sharing in ..& dark too ofeten right?
& along comes master cutted..with his step by step do this do that have him.. then... blah blah blah ..not helping..

sis stop faking..help yourself get there rubbing your clit try to keep your breathing natural & synced so your motions & eagerness sync as well is this really a guy your connected with ? if so use that connection & just let it build ..keep eye contact keep fucus on eachother & a truly simultanius orgasm is the most beaitiful thing.. let it build & come..but dont dwell on it dont rush it take your time but help yourself get there..

if u notice any thoughts orfeelings getting in the way..pm me..theres possible mental emotional blocks as well as pat experiences & lotsa reasons u may have problems..

 

I think there is some sort of emotional block that keeps it from happening. I think too much, even during sex, and i cant prevent it, it just happens.


I still havent been able to, let alone get myself off.

Maybe im just orgasmless lol

 

there are such things as sex therapists if youd like to try seein gone... if its more mental than physical they may be of some help

 

Hi FlyFlyAway,

I've got to start by saying that I feel for you.

The techniques people have been sharing I strongly believe will make an orgasm better but not necessarily give you one!

I've got to say that I'm a guy and by no means an expert... None of us here will know exactly how you feel!... That said I have observed that women are often able to be intensly arroused (and I'm talking close to "orgasm" here) without so much as taking their clothes off or inserting anything!

With this in mind I belive your particular issue is in fact emotional. Let me explain:

Have you ever had someone brush up against you and you felt hot?
Have you ever gone to a "formal" party/wedding... and pressed up against a corner and kissed?

... this is how an orgasm should start. Go back to your teen "make-out" session days for clues. It isn't about sex - it is about you being so mentally "hot"... that it bottles up and you explode.

All the best...

urbancowboy