Girlfriend Won't Orgasm

Kind of long so bear with me...

I've been with my girlfriend for about four months, and we have sex alot but she never has an orgasm. She says she absolutely loves having sex, but she just never comes. She normally wants to have sex even more than I do most of the time. However, at one point, I'd gone down on her for over 45 minutes and still no orgasm. It's not that I'm horrible in bed, as I've had alot of girlfriends in the past and would consider myself fairly experienced.

Now here's where it gets interesting...

Before me, she'd had sex with one person, only one time. She was very drunk and says it was one of the biggest mistakes of her life. She had to get a morning after pill and cried for days afterwards, because it was so traumatic for her. However... she had an orgasm that night. She doesn't remember much, but one thing she distinctly remembers was having an orgasm.

Needless to say, this confused the hell out of me and didn't do much to boost my confidence. I really want to give her an orgasm and just don't know what is going on. She says that maybe she was so traumatized by her previous experience that it's very hard or impossible for her to have an orgasm now.

Can anyone offer some insight into what they think might be happening? Is it me or is it her? It really frustrates me that she had an orgasm her first time and hasn't with me in the tons of times that we've had sex. Any help is appreciated.

 

It sounds like she has built up some resistance because of the memory of her
previous experience?

Encourage her to talk to someone who can help her....a counsellor maybe?

I was having sexual blocks for a while and received a couple of sessions from a
shaman healer....she really helped me to let go....

Thats been a while back and I now find it easy to totally immerse myself in my sexuality!

 

Well if she was very ashamed and upset about the first time then its going to be difficult for her to let go again for a long time, so maybe thats part of it.
another part is also probably she is trying to hard, and reinforcing the block she already has, take the pressure off, forget about the orgasm part, for a while, dont focus on that aspect of the sexual experience.
another thought is to quit with penetration for a while, build up a little sexual frustration, lots of forplay and lots of clitoral stimulation, does she orgasm for herself?if not get her to masterbate til she does, once she can let go for herself she will find it easier with you.

 

washburn you fuckin' scared me( i thought you were my boyfriend posting about me not being able to orgasm...and we've been together for four monthes and all that beauty). but yeah she might've built up a wall because of that experience. i agree with the whole her having to masturbate to reach it because i believe once she gets there she'll be able to open up and let 'em outt.

 

lol how funny would that be if two couples posted on the same wall :O very interesting.

 

Washburn - try giving her a G spot orgasm - check out my other posts on how to do it, or PM me. About 20% of women never or rarely have orgasms, and only about 25% can get them from intercourse alone. Another 25% can only get them from manual stimulation. So it is not your fault.

Create the most relaxing atmosphere, do a lot of foreplay (kissing, massage, oral, etc.) and perhaps take a drink or hit or two (not too much), and then try to give her a G spot orgasm (perhaps giving her a clitoral one at the same time (or she can do it).

If you are lucky, she will get a double orgasm.

 

does she even know what an orgasm is? its when the vagina contracts.

ask her what sensations she felt in her genitalia the last time she orgasmed because a women SHOULD be able to orgasm with the right amount of foreplay and clitoral/gspot stimulation before penetration.

if they're horny, it doesn't matter what they've been through in the past, it shouldn't stop them from orgasming...so FINAL VERDICT: up your game as far as foreplay is concerned!

 

an orgasm is so much more than when teh vagina contracts. imean, yeah, thats the base biology of it but that doesnt even come close to describing how good it is. not to mention most women can tighten up voluntarily, or sometimes do sporadically from pleasure without it being an orgasm

 

And there ARE mental blocks! If a woman's uncomfortable in some way (whether it's conscious or unconscious) she might not be able to climax. She might be tense...and it's more likely not to happen or even to be kinda painful.

I agree, work on it. It'll happen once you both completely lose your inhibitions.

 

ok, I've heard of a couple of these girls throughout my life. 1 of 2 things here: 1. She has had an orgasm but she juss doesn't actually know that it is. 2. She juss wont let herself "go" with you. I used to have a gf that claimed she never had one too. Me and her went together for awhile. The first month or so I couldn't give her one. THen all of a sudden I started giving her some and after that it turned into an everyday thing. She finally admitted that she wasn't "comfortable" with having one with me juss yet. :H WEIRD