I'm not sure if this is entirely the right place to post this, but I figured that since it has to do with conventions of love and the way people view love's duties, it could fit.... My boyfriend and I have been discussing marriage for awhile now, not in any concrete terms or promises but in general "what if" scenarios and playful "when the time comes" ways. He has offered - no, practically demanded - to take my name. He has no connection with his and likes mine. At first, I was a little iffy about this, but now that I think about it, I wouldn't mind it at all. My family tree would continue and we could both be happy. I'll admit that I like the way his last name sounds, but honestly, if it makes him happy, I'd be glad to have us both go under my name. I'm sure my parents would appreciate the surprise.... Anyway, out of sheer curiosity, what does everyone else think? Guys, would you take a girl's name? Girls, would you take a guy's name? What about hyphenations? Is it a horrible double standard that girls are expected to take the guy's name, but not the other way around, or is it just one of those silly little old traditions that're harmless? Just as a side note, I sort of feel that this goes hand-in-hand with the asking of a father's permission for his daughter's hand in marriage. I disagree with it fully, but interestingly, my uber-liberal, feminist boyfriend agreed with it (until I told him I'd be pissed if he did it, which is when his enthusiasm died, heh).
I took my husband's last name when we got married. I have no attachment to my previous last name (my mom doesn't even have the same last name, she got remarried) and in his family, well... his grandmother had three girls, and his mom is the only one that kept the last name. So him and his brother are the only ones, really, to carry on the name (his sister's kids, I think, took their father's last name). And like I said, I have no attachment to my previous last name, and there are others in my family (cousins) to carry on the name. That said, I wouldn't go by both last names because I just don't like it. Most people relate that to step-families, remarrying, etc. And with my previous last name being Brown, it would just sound funny.
I took my husband's last name. Heck, when we were merely engaged I was signing my name to everything as my maiden name hyphen his last name. :&
In the U.S. and many other countries, it is customary for the woman to take the man's last name when they get married, but it is not required. In the U.S. it is possible for the husband to take the wife's last name, but there are some legal technicalities which have to be observed. Each state has its own laws, so check it out before doing it. Good reasons for taking the wife's last name are: 1. If the wife's family name will die out if the wife takes the husband's. 2. If the husband's name is ugly or rhymes badly with the wife's first name. 3. If there are multiple family names which could be used. It also is a common practice in the U.S. for the wife to take the husband's name, but with a hyphen, i.e., "Sarah Jones" becomes "Sarah Jones-Smith". And the Husband can do the same if he wants. It is also common in the U.S. for a professional woman to retain her maiden name even after marriage, for professional purposes.
I dont see why last name or anything else would matter that much to any one, as long as you both love one another. I wouldnt want to take someone else's last name because i like mine already but I wouldnt force them to take my last name, if they felt the same way
