My 13 year old sister was found drunk...

Thank you.

I was thinking that as well, but I decided not to say anything about it.

Some people were extremely helpful, and for that I am glad.

 

I would love to help, but sadly I was a drunk by the time I turned 12. I do hope she comes around, but she is only 13 right? So Im sure she will soon see the problems she is going to be causing herself. At least she has a loving sister

 

Just wondering if you are sure there was no sexual abuse... seeing as she was laying in a public place passed out with her pants down. Might want to take her to the hospital to get checked out...

Why is your mom just letting her do this? Maybe you should repost this someplace else, like the family forum, mental health and/or parenting? Would probably get some more serious responses there.

good luck to your whole family, my dear.

 

She was at a girlfriend's house when it happened and there were no boys around. She was the only one drunk and she tried to take her pants off in her sleep, apparently.

That was one of my first thoughts as well.

 

when i was 13 i didnt drink, but i didnt listen to anyone either. however my sister did (drink) and has for the past four years and walks all over my mom now.... good luck

 

That is scarey...god knows what COULD have happened , and what she did deserves tough love , she might act like she hates you for awhile , but sometimes you have to be a hardnose to protect someone that doesnt see tha bad side of what they are doing , but also , mix lots of love into the discipline , even though she will push you away and pretend that you hate her because your being tough on her , she will know deep inside that its becuse you love her....she is 13..she is not old enough to make decisions about her life on her own. Good luck to you , I will be sending blessings

 

Thank you.

Your blessings are very much appreciated.

 

everyone learns from example, no mater who wants them not to, even themselves.

(and continues to do so, no matter how much older we all get. once we're out on our own, and only once we're out on our own, we get some degree of choice as to what examples we explose ourselves to. and of course, as long as we live and breathe we are setting examples for everyone we come in contact with or otherwise is awaire and observent of our own existence. i say this not to judge anybody, but as a flat statement of what is observable.)

=^^=
.../\...

 

I live in the Welsh Vallies, where drinking is very much a social activity. For over a century the pubs have been considered as one of the most important part of a community, along with the parish. I was brought up to respect alcohol in the naive sense I had, and rightfully, I did. I was never told that alcohol was evil, nor was I told never to drink it. However, what I was taught was that I needed to be mature enough before I could drink it, and actually handle the consequences of it in an understanding manner.

I believe that this was a major part in my view on alcohol. To actually condemn something in such a manner, and blatantly force your negative views on it to a pre-adolescent is giving more harm than good. It actually shows your own lack of understanding towards it, as well as clouding the kids understanding as they mature.

Growing up around something -- weather it's alcohol or anything else -- in a safe eviroment is probably one of the healthiest things for a child.

 

i'm actually right there with luke. our family, aside from joking about it, has never really had any alcohol dependencies or drug dependency problems. probably because despite everyone going through a heavy phase of usage, all walk away from it unscathed. probably because there wasn't any major trauma associated with the fuck ups. just a great deal of light-hearted mockery that ended the drama, added to the headache and embarassment. you tend to get over it easier when it's not that big a deal, i guess.

 

Yes , I can see where you and Luke are coming from , and i respect your views , I think my fear comes from having so many friends buried because of drinking and passing out.......

 

Be thankful that your sister hasn't died...

Sometimes people are going to make bad choices despite what well-meaning advice is given. The best thing might be for you to be there when she hits rock bottom and be a support for her once she's ready to start getting her act together. Embarrassing things happen to many people/families. In the long run you will be more defined by how you cope when things are at their worst. Show some tough love now and be there for her. She'll remember that you were there for her in a way that really matters and makes a difference.

 

She is trying to find her own path, her drinking may have been experimental, and you must handle it carefully. If you dig in to hard, she may delve farther in order to escape the path she sees you laying before her. It is a bit young for her, but people mature at different ages, so this could be a good thing, though it may not seem like it. you must let her know that ultamitely it is her choice, but right now, it is safer to let someone with more life experience lead her down a path untill she is mature enough to select her own. But you also musn't stand in the way of her nature, because she will either do it like this, where you can see her, or behind your back, where you can't. So even if she does drink again, she should know that it would be safer to pass out on your floor, then on someone elses. Hope this helps. Take what you will

 

experimental at age 13?? damn..... when I was 13, I was collecting baseball cards and doing more time reading books and studying than "experimenting" hell, I didnt even know what weed was at that age, nor did I ever think about drinking alcohol.

kids these days.... thats a real serious issue. we are talkin a kid who is barely into her teens

 

I agree with both sides of this for different reasons.

I remember when I was in high school- lots of the freshmen that were about 14 years old drank now and then. It just wasn't a big deal for a lot of people and they turned out okay... was just social and I know it seems young but that is the experience I had.

I also know thirteen is REALLY young to be getting drunk. If I had a thirteen year old kid that got drunk... yes, I'd be worried as hell and not know what to do.

Really I think young kids do experiment and it does need to be addressed but if it was just the first time.... it may not be a big deal.

 

maybe your sister is concerned about the purity of the drinking water???... throughout the middle ages in europe, folks (kids too) drank only beer and wine cuz you knew it wasn't fecal contaminated as were all the streams and much of the available drinking water