Me and my boyfriend started as computer friends. He came and visited me and I went to visit him. Somewhere along the line we decided to be boyfriend and girlfriend. The thing is we went out, slept in the same bed, did things together and nothing was there. We were attached to each other but we didn’t love each other. He kept pressuring for me to move in with him at first I wanted to. I don’t have a good home life and at the point I was so miserable I didn’t want to get up in the morning. The more I started thinking about it the more I thought It was a bad idea. Why move across the country for mutual companionship and not because of love. I got a bad felling in my stomach that if I moved in with him I would be stuck. He lives with his parents and doesn’t even want to work because his parent’s pretty much pay for everything and the government pays the rest because he has schizophrenia. I don’t have money of my own and can’t even afford health care for myself. The fact that living with these people I will basically be freeloading off of them. My boyfriend told me money isn’t a problem and his parents would be happy to pay. I grew up in a life that was month to month. I couldn’t afford to get health care insurance. Fixing the pipes was more important than glasses. Food was more important than anti anxiety meds. Due to his schizophrenia he doesn’t have the ability to plan out his future he can’t even pick a place to go to dinner. I fell he is so much smarter and much more capable of doing a lot more stuff than what he thinks he is. I think he uses his schizophrenia as a excuse not to try and live his life. Numerous people have lived long health lives with schizophrenia. He is on medication several times daily but he complains they do nothing for him. Whenever I tell him how I feel he skates around the issue or gets annoyed at me and won’t call me for a few day. I keep telling I need more time to think he keeps pressuring to make a decision. I am beginning to think he just likes me for my generic companionship other than my personality. I told him what if it didn’t work out and he told me I could just move somewhere else. Well the thing is I don’t know any one there or have money. Also I have a dog and my stuff. Unlike him I can’t just move from once place or another on a whim and abandon my life. He told me to get a job. No matter how I pointed all the reasons he didn’t seem to get it. From what I got he didn’t seem to care much about the relationship he just wanted something now. I’m starting to get fed up with everything right now.
Under those conditions, why would you want to move? Are you also emotionally dependent on him, in some way? How and why? Living together is a complicated thing. If you're having all these misgivings before you move, how do you reckon it could work out? Do you feel like you can say "no" to him?
/-umm im going to pm you on this 1 cause i ..just gotta ssk 1 question privately.. but honnestly there doesnt seem to be much reason to movce except to givbe him what he wants..and i think your already kinda down yourself and would have jumped at anything that seemed hopeful without wquestion..just the fact that your questioning says alot and i think you should justtry to be there for him as a freind but if theres hope for love or rommance i just dont think its thrre..even stable compannionship seems unlikely
