Me and my girlfriend have been going out for almost 2 years now. We've both known from the start that I was going travelling after my A-levels, and now im only a week away from going!! We're both so worried about our relationship we're both getting really down about it. I'm really worried she may get bored waiting for me, cheat on me, or just not like the person I may become when it is all over. She's worried too about that, but also that she may get depression because of it and maybe even feel resent towards me because I CHOSE to go and leave her at home. Does anyone have any success stories from taking a gap year and being in an LDR while away?? Any tips on how to keep it going and get through it?? I'm leaving on the 18th Feb, and she is planning on meeting me in LA on June 12th. We're apart for about 15-16 weeks. There is a set date on our time apart, does that help an LDR? I'm just worried that I'll go to meet her at the airport, and we will both feel differently about each other. The way I feel right now, is that I would marry her if we were just 5 years older. I feel so much in love I dont want to ruin it by travelling, come back and have nothing. Any advice on how to keep things going? Thanks!!
I think the set date will for sure help. The fact that you guys have a solid relationship before you move is also great. I think you going is really good. You doing what you need to do is great so you won't hold resentment towards her. If she loves you she'll support your decision!
A LDR can be just as fulfilling as a relationship with close proximity contrary to what others may say. There are many ways to show your love and be creative. In fact, in many studies, it is more common to feel fulfilled in LDR than in close proximity relationships. if you want it, you will do it. I have been away from my girl two times for 12 weeks. Currently it is the 3rd time we are far, it has been 4 weeks and we have another 6 weeks.
yeah I think you're right, as there is a definite end to the time apart, i'm sure it will help!! I really want it to work, and I know she does, its just we're scared it wont and I know she's scared I might find someone else. Now I can say right now that I'm not going looking for someone else, and I dont want to find anyone else. But sometimes these things cant be helped and they just hit you! I know that because thats wat happened when I met her!! It wasnt planned it just sorta happened!! I guess thats what I'm more worried about than anything, because I know how easy it is to fall for someone especially while youre away from home, and how easy it could be to fall out of love with my girlfriend as im not going to be seeing her every day like im so used to doing!!
well thats it. my girlfried has just gone away for the week and now im left here ready to go on sunday for 3 and a half months of not seeing her. how can you cope? how can you deal with this? I was absolutely fine up until the moment she left and now im just a mess. I cant stop thinking about her and I miss her already. The thought of 16 weeks of not seeing her is killing me. I know it will be a bit better once I've gone, but when she comes back next week and im gone, shes going to be feeling just like I am. Difference is she's here at home with all the things that will remind her of me. I know the fact that it is a definite amount of time is helping, but it just seems so long. I want to enjoy my time away but I cant stop myself looking forward until its all over. I cant bear the thought that I may only be able to speak to her once a day, every other day maybe even once a week!! I cant deal with that. I just spoke to her now, 2 hours after she left, and I want to ring her again. I cant stand the thought that I'm not going to speak to her until tonight, tomorrow or maybe even sunday. How are you able to deal with this, because obviously i'm not alone in the LDR situation, but to have someone who you have seen pretty much every single day for the last 2 years just removed completely is really a nasty shock. She seems to be coping quite well, but thats just because shes away for the time being. I know that once I go and she gets back she will be in hysterics about this. Its actually at the point where I dont want to get my stuff ready, and dont even want to go any more. I really am not in the mood to go any more. There has to be some way of not feeling like this? Or does it go away after a while? Please help me, I really dont know what to do, ive never had this happen before as she's pretty much my first serious relationship so i've never had the upset of being dumped.
It gets easier! I promise!!! When I was in a long distance relationships it was SO HARD at first and then it became a bit easier. If I trusted myself I think it would have been a lot easier. So just trust yourself and then the fear of meeting somone else on accident won't always be in the for front of your mind. Maybe instead of trusting that you will still be together trust that whatever is right for you will happen.
i hope it gets easier. ive been feeling really crap all day today. ive been to see her mum and dad today and had a long chat about it, they said that it will fly by and everything is going to be fine. i wish it could be that easy. I decided to go out tonight to a club with my mates, as a kinda send off. I just looked at all the girls there and was completely put off. I think thats a good sign that I can cope with the test of having it all in front of you but controlling the urge to go for it. It actually made me feel physically sick thinking of doing anything with anyone else, and kept thinking that tbh i would rather have been with my gf in bed watching a movie or sumthin like that than out at a club. Day one has gone, just another 115 to go!! Christ, I hope it goes a little quicker than it sounds. Today has dragged on and on and on, and as much as I want to enjoy my trip, I dont want it to drag out too long as I may start feeling I want to leave as its too much for me to handle. Which in the long run I may look back on a regret, especially if we break up in a years time or so. So I hope you're right and that it does get easier. I always expected that the first day, or even first week would be the worst, so hopefully its upwards from here. She has her family and freinds to support her back home, while I'm in a foreign country all by myself, having to make new friends who may not care about my situation. It could be shit. We'll just have to wait and see. I know we'll get thru it, Im just worried it may be too much for me to deal with and I will bottle it and come home. That it wont get easier and may only get worse. But theres nothing i can do now. Shes gone, im almost on my way, and thats it until June 12th!
i was in LDR for 8-9 months. Hardest thing i ever did it was worth it. i met my husbsnd on the internet. He was from up north i was from the Central part of canada. Anyways we dated and it was hard . I seen him 2 months here 2 months there. i had school he had work i had work he had other things to do back in his home city. about 5-6 months after we met , I recieved a pckg in the mail from him and in it was my engagement ring with a letter inside . "will you marry me" I caled him up and said YES! As soon as he was able to come see me where i was located he went down on one knee and asked me properly. We just got married last Mar. 18/06 this will be our 1 yr . I know if i can do it and many more ppl can do it you can too. Trust your heart . Don't what if it . Trust her with your heart. My huby and I had a lot of contact with eachother e-mail phone calls letters text messages presents and surprises etc. But you have to believe in your self and your gf. We've been together for 4 years !! Tc PG
