do i fuckin amuze you mothafucker

Discussion in 'U.K.' started by paulfreespirit, Jan 28, 2007.

  1. paulfreespirit

    paulfreespirit Senior Member

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  2. paulfreespirit

    paulfreespirit Senior Member

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    in your head do you feel like what yer suppose to feel
     
  3. Stoned Steve.

    Stoned Steve. Member

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    Once upon a time there was a young girl, her mother asked her to deliver bread and wine to her grandmother, who was ill, and lived further in the forest. Before the young girl set off, her mother took her to one side and said, "My darling daughter please be careful in the forest, for there are many that we do not know there, if anyone talks to you do not tell them where you are going!".

    Young girls are a strange breed, thinking that they always know better, and the mothers words went unheeded, for as the young girl walked further into the forest, she came upon a wolf, who asked, "pretty young girl, where are you going on such a nice day, with such a heavy basket..." The young girl replied "to my grandmothers, she lives further down this track. My mother has asked me to deliver this basket to her, as she is ill".

    The wolf smiled to himself, knowing that he knew a quicker way to the grandmother's house, "How sweet of you my dear", the wolf said as he walked away. As soon as the wolf was out of the young girls sight, he sped off to the grandmothers house. As soon as he arrived he killed the grandmother, but did not eat her. Instead he carved off the meat off of her thigh and placed it on a platter, and decanted the grandmothers blood, and left it in a bottle next to the platter. The wolf then dressed in the grandmothers clothes, and waited.

    The young girl arrived at the house, "Grandmama, I have brought you this basket for you!", "why thank you my dear" replied the wolf, "just put the basket down by the table, I have left some meat and wine there for you child". And like all young girls, this girl was starving after her walk through the forest, and she greedily ate up the meat, and drank down the wine. So busy the girl was eating and drinking that she did not hear her Grandmothers cat who had seen everything say, "Slut to eat the flesh, and drink the blood of your Grandmother, you will pay the price".

    After the young girl had finished her meal, the wolf asked "Are you tired after your meal, my child?". To which the young girl replied "Why yes I am...", "Well you can come in beside me my child, take off your cloak and place it in the fire, you won't be needing that anymore"

    The young girl did as she was told, and did the same with all of her clothes, until she stood in the light of the fire as naked as she was the day she was born... "Now my child climb in beside me" said the wolf. The young girl climbed into the bed next to the wolf, "Grandmama why are you so hairy?" asked the young girl,
    "All the better to keep me warm, my child"
    As the young girl moved closer to the wolf she exclaimed "Grandmama what sharp nails you have!"
    "All the better to scratch my back with my dear" The wolf said with a grin, with this the young girl said "Oh my Grandmama what sharp teeth you have!"

    "All the beter to eat you with"
     
  4. paulfreespirit

    paulfreespirit Senior Member

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    bedtime already steve .............the cat sat on the mat man
     
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