Hi everybody! I haven't posted here (means whole Forums) for a really long time! I'm sorry, I was just ... I don't know, that doesn't matter. But now, I got sometning I need to share with someone. I suppose you'll think I am a ... ehrm ... stupid or immature girl, or whatever.. Look, I've met this guy on internet in fall 2005. We were just talking about this and that, his gf's and my bf's ... bla bla bla. One year after, the last fall, our conversation became more private than ever. He's been trying to find a woman, who would really love him and in a few years wanted to have children and family... he was telling me about his women and was always very sad, when it ended badly. In december, I realized that our conversations weren't the same as before.. I started being a little yellow - I admit. But because we acted like we were a dad and a daughter - coz he's "a few" years older than I am - he probably didn't think I could feel more than a friendship... anyways, these days (after our live meeting), I decided to let my emotions free and see what happens. and .. happens the best way it could.. he says he feels the same, on monday, we're going to cancel that dad - daughter game and ... look, he's 33 and I'm 18. He wants family and children and I wanna travel and just... discover the world.. but I DO LOVE HIM! - That I know for sure.. he's just ... nah, ok, you can imagine what I think about him when I love him The reason for writing my story here is: I'm incredibly afraid of it. I love him too much that I'm afraid that ... look, I'm just Libra - I'm not able to make a decision and .. then, very often, when something good lies right in front of me, somehow, I always throw it away - I am not normal, I know.. but I love him and am afraid of hurting him because of that.. stupidity of mine.. sorry about such a long post, if you have already read it - please, tell me some of your opinions to this.. just "go for it" or "better leave him" .. I'm just too confused of love, probably.. thank you.
This is my opinion: The saying that age doesn't matter works perfectly in theory. In reality however, it does. Case in point, you and this guy. He wants to settle down while you want to, in your own words, "discover the world". Yes, age does matter because the greater the age gap, the more differences you have between the two of you: different goals, different life experiences, etc. And these things can and will test your relationship. But then, what relationship isn't tested? What relationship doesn't go through tough times? I'm not going to tell you what to do except have the courage to make a decision because no matter how scared you are of being decisive you're still gonna have to decide for yourself what it is that you really want. That's what love and life require of you. You need to be brave to truly love. And truly live.
well said Musikero. Unfortunately, we cannot feel what you are feeling for this man Jana. So only you truly know how much he means to you. therefore you are the only person who can make the BEST decision on what to do in the future. If you want my honest opinion, i think you would be happier if you waited (just remained friends with him) to find someone closer to your age. 33 and 18 is a lot different than say 24 or 25 and 18. But it isnt ridiculous either. I just think you are still very much a young adult, which enables you to have an enormous amount of time left to find a special someone. Hell, ive been looking for a woman to "settle down" with and be able to travel the world together, and share all our experiences with eachother and everything but girls my age do not want to "settle down" and get involved in a serious relationship. So, i feel like im just gonna have to suck it up for a year or two until girls grow up a little bit and desire a serious relationship. I think if you wait, you will find someone who is just as good for you if not better than this man. But like i said before, you are the best one to answer your question not me. Just listen to your heart
you're soo right.. thank you. I just realized.. oh well, I have decided to try it. Though he says he wants to settle down, I don't think it's the only thing he wants to .. he has sooo many things to do, he travels a lot and has always some plan for evening ok ... thank you for courage.
I listen to it ... and it say me "try it"... I know it's just as difficult as love is difficult, but I don't wanna be that type who will say "I'm stupid, I had to try it ..." thanks for your advise
ooo that's tricky one to answer, i think if you do what's right and in your heart then you will feel better i think.
33 and 18. When he is 63 you will be 48. Is that ok? Don't tie yourself down if you want to travel and hopefully will get more education before you settle down. The age difference is too great. Wait.
The world average age difference is half the male's age plus seven years. Your friend's 33 divided in two = 16.5 plus 7 = 23. You're a little young, inexperienced, and sound a bit gulible! Think!
My concern is more with the fact that you two want COMPLETELY different things right now. You want travel and excitement, he wants stability and comfort. The two aren't by necessity mutually exclusive but it can be really damn hard to make them work together.
ok, guys, thank you a lot for your advices, but I have already decided. I'll try it. I simply do love him. And he says he does love me too, and .. you know, he's really open-minded, so there's no problem with travelling and so .. and being 48 and 63? What wrong about it? My dad is ten yrs older than my mother and there's no problem about age...
my mum is marryed to someone 23 years yunger than she is, they real happy, so if it works for them...
