Safe threesome sex

So my boyfriend and I have discussed having a threesome with another girl, and I just want to know what are some things to think about to make a threesome safer? My boyfriend and I are both clean and I'm on the pill. Obviously he will use a condom with the other girl. We wouldn't bother with dental dams or anything because I've done some research on the risks of giving and receiving unproteced oral sex, and basically they are so small that I don't think it's worth all the hassle (it's a bigger chance of getting an std from swallowing semen than from vaginal fluid anyway). But what about if he licks her, then goes to lick me straight away? Is that a no-no? Any other things I should be avoiding?

 

well if you know the other girl and she is clean i dont think there is any harm in anything that doesnt involve anal as far as stds go

 

No we don't know who the girl will be yet. Obviously we'll try to make sure she is clean beforehand but if it's just a spur-of-the-moment thing then we want to be as safe as possible.

 

I dont think there is much to worry about as far as him transferring anything by doind that with you right after her.

 

You should have her get checked for STD's, and have her get a pap smear. Condom's aren't effective when it comes to HPV, which can cause cervical cancer, Which can kill you, or make it impossible to have children.

 

Personally I've discussed this over and over with my boyfriend and as far as emotional and your relationship goes, I wouldn't do it. But that's a personal decision you have to make. I just figured it may help to have another opinion on that point.

As far as me being unbiased, I will say this. Definitely have her get checked. It may make you feel demanding or what not but honestly, what's more important; some fun sex for a night or ending up with a deadly disease.
Plus, then you won't have to worry about it at all. I also suggest doing it with someone you know. (this can get awkward however but, the whole situation in a little awkward when you think about it.) You want to pick the right someone who isn't going to either A) Lie to you about their health and sexual history or B) End up with someone who is going to blab/brag to all their so called friends about your personal life.

Honestly, due to all this hassle, I advise you to really REALLY think about the end consequences. Such as, what happens IF the other girl gets pregnant? Are you really ready to deal with that!

Either way, good luck and I hope you make the right decision for yourself.... which I have no doubt that you will!

 

did both of you choosed the girl? and why another girl and not a guy? I dont think you should go for it unless he is willing to have a 3some with a guy or you really (honestly) like the girl too.

 

well the risk depends on what you consider dangerous to your health. let's try n break it down a little better.

there's HIV of course. but condom use (as long as it is adhered to) is reasonably effectiive here and although there are isolated cases of oral sex being the only cause of HIV reported the number of cases (less than 50 in the literature) would make this a very tenuous connection.

then you have the other potentially life threatening STDs hepatitis/gonorrhoea/syphilis. very often will cause definite symptoms which will cause most to seek medical help. whilst all these are treatable if you do get them, there is a chance you could be left with long term consequences. in the UK there is a stedy rise in both gonorrhoea and syphilis. it's hard to quantify the risk though with a concrete figure. chances of death - slim to nothing. chances of severe long term health disability - slightly greater than slim to nothing.

then there is the one that can really bugger you up. chlamydia. this one is dangerous because it is relatively asymptomatic in the female but is one of the commoner causes of infertility (causes blocked fallopian tubes). put it this way. this blocked tubes roughly constitute 1/3 patients seen the infertility clinic. of these more than 2/3rds will be secondary to chlamydia. if you assume infertility occurs in about 10% of the population then you can work out that in 2/10 cases have a component caused by chlamydia. this is the one that will get you most often. infection is transmitted through unprotected sex of any kind including oral.

Herpes simplex (cold sores) and genital warts. Minor inconvenieces and not life threatening ever. However I wouldn't want either!

that in a nutshell covers the most common STDs. bottom line is condom use will protect you against the most STDs.

what would I recommend as a medic? professionally speaking I'd say don't do it. personally speaking, I can see the fun in a 3 some and if u're going to go ahead then get checked out primarily for chlamydia after it. have fun but keep it (relatively) safe!

 

Actually I'm more into the threesome idea than he is because I really want to experiment with another girl. I wouldn't mind a threesome with another guy either but that was a definite no from my boyfriend.

To be honest, I don't even know if it's going to happen but if it does it will probably be without much planning. I'm pretty informed about std's and have read up on all the statistics and risks concerning heterosexual sex... But I've never heard much about std prevalence in lesbians and how to minimise the risks of those.

That's a very good point, I really hadn't thought of that! In that case maybe a good idea is for my boyfriend not to penetrate her (unless she's on the pill, as condom + pill is enough protection against pregnancy imo).

 

if u wanna do it and have the experience ... just do it and don't hesitate coz u'd never do it...
pick up a good girl and go for it
after that, u 'd have the right to do it with a guy which i think would be more enjoyable for u

 

The best advice I have to offer is top take your time and find someone who is discreet and honest. Talk about all aspects (rules) and risks, not to mention some past sexual history. There are health risks out there, but not everywhere, so play it safe until there is trust between all three of you!

One more thing: it is difficult to find a single woman who would be open to threesomes. At least thats what I have been told. My better half and I have been casually looking for a single woman or even another couple, and good people seen hard to find.

 

Who raised this artifact?
The Op hasnt been online since 2007..