A Married Man....

You need to reasses why this relationship has you so turned on. Part of the excitement is simply because he is married. Make no mistake his wife and child are his priority, no matter what he may tell you. You are simply a good time and a diversion from whatever may be wrong in his life. With time you will probably become more attatched while he still views you as a fun plaything. Give yourself more credit than this, I'm sure you deserve better.

 

I guess i siad it all in the subject... but so far all you people can think of is how someone would be trying to just "get their kicks" by fucking a married guy...

I was interested well before i knew he was married, and I'm sorry ladies, but this isn't the fairy-tale world of "married happily ever after" anymore.... could you blame it on someone like me?? I guess you could, but if we all look back at history (even current times) Mistresses, Courtesans and Geishas have not only been apart of culture and society for hundreds (even thousands) of years... but have actually been seen as beneficial members of society-usually the most educated, independently thinking women of their time (check it out, you'll see what i mean) so i am not so inclined to believe that all "Adulteresses" are of the same creed as your cocaine-addicted hooker or blonde-hair-blue-eyed-gold-digging home-wrecker...

i don't seek to justify myself to anyone, to be honest.... I was really hoping to find people with less Christianised points of view... and I can understand where an extra-marital relationship can hurt a family, but this is often in the case when the couple are found out-or happen to fall in love.... but truth be told, i would estimate almost 90% of all marriages are not built on true love to begin with-why so many of them turn sour in the first few years... people have this conception of love, and it only ends up being an addiction to the sensation of being "in love" and all starry eyed that people seek-true passion and love don't really exist anywhere in these relationships-only fleeting, short-lived hot-burning moments that burn out as quickly as they've flared up...

So in this case it seems, that what I might be doing (and maybe other girls/boys in my situation) aren't actually taking from the family, but possibly even helping... that whatever passion that was there (probably) has already left, and the cordial relationship between spouses, held together for the interest of the child is maintained because at least some of the frustration is alleviated....

If you research the history of Geishas and Courtesans in particular, you will understand what i mean...

 

i am sorry this part made me laugh..

its called "having morals and respect for yourself" and putting yourself in the wife's shoes...
has absouletly nothing to do with any religion, nice try though...

 

I've been told, many times in fact, by married women, that they would LOVE for their husbands to have a mistress, then they would stop bothering them (the wives) for sex.

The way I see it, it's just sex.




His family is his business. I'd disregard all the pseudo-christian morality stuff if I was in your position.


He's the only one commiting any betrayal. If you can still find him attractive, after learning he's dishonest and without loyalty, then do what you want.

 

Whoooo, handbags out!

The only person who deserves any abuse here is the married man. Sweet Sangria isn't the one who is going to cheat on a spouse. She owes no loyalty to anyone but herself. This guy obviously isn't commited to his marriage. THAT is the problem.

 

To tell you the truth, if you like it and he likes it, then whats the problem....who knows how his relationship is with his wife, you might be just the refreshment he needs to assess his situation and figure out what can or cannot be fixed...that being said, be careful not to fall in love.


its just sex, keep it that way.

 

I got a better idea, Go fuck a horse.

 

So I haven't read all the posts, but how does his wife feel about it? If she doesn't care, then it doesn't matter. I would see if she wants in on it...frankly, if my husband brought home another girl for fun & games, I'd be pretty stoked...but I would be hurt if he had fooled around with her without telling me & sharing her...

 

Oh, I should have read all the posts.

I think it is perfectly unreasonable to assume that his wife is not OK with the situation, and I think that the moral issues here are entirely dependent on his wife's opinion. I mean, it's not OK to do things knowing that they are hurtful to others--unless there is a GOOD reason for it, like telling your friend that their husband is cheating on them--but many wives are open to the idea of polyamory. I have been the third party (shared by a couple) before getting married, and I'd be perfectly happy to bring a third party into my marriage. It's my husband who's not too keen on the idea...he doesn't like to share me

 

I refer you to what I posted earlier, I dont think it says anything about you just wanting to get your kicks out of fucking a married man


hmm, its up to you, but dont you think hes being a greedy shit?

I mean he gets it all, his wife, his kids , his happy la de da family and his bit on the side. What do you get out of it, a cheap thrill a poor fuck and major guilt, obviously you ont totally agree with the situation or you wouldnt be trying to get others to justify it for you.

I dont think your a bad person, just a little foolish for caving in for this loser.

 

Umm... no. What kind of reality are you living in?

Anyway... Whatever it is that you're doing is your business, but have you ever thought about how his wife would feel if she found out (or how she's feeling if she already knows) and how would YOU feel if your husband was cheating you like that?
If the wife knows and is cool with that... then that's another story.

 

Try growing as one of the child.
Nothing to do with being Christian. I wasn't a Christian and it still hurted.
My Great-Grandfather also married twice. The effects can still be felt now, 4 generations later. He is still alive and kicking by the way. A good 90+

 

I'm glad dad cheated on my mum, cos I dont have to live with him. There are some small mercies

 

fuck the sinning. thats all bullshit anyway. what's going on here is that you feel better about yurself getting a guy whos married. like oooh i must be soooo fucking hot if i can make him CHEAT!! ugh!! don't be a bitch. what goes around comes around...........................................................
think of what u will do to that poor wife of his. i mean if hes a bastard u should go fucking tell his wife man. see? men stick up for men but women betray eachother this is why men are always gonna be more dominant. its women like u that decent women like me HATE.
u make it harder for us to be equal to men with this kind of behaviour.
i can't believe you would proudly post this up on this net. i bet u already fucked him too didnt u?
god that poor wife of this man. the shit that goes on man i tell ya. its so insensitive. as if this lecture is even gonna make a difference.... yeah yeah yeah so if he duznt fuck u he'll fuck someone else. well FINE whatever, but if some married man wanted to fuck me i'd be like no way bastard. n tell his wife. cuz i would hope that someone would do that for me too... god, you are *SO* mean!!!!

*scowl
*frown

this is so sad.

 

i understand what you mean. you're just a slut. simple. you obviously don't care about the consequences of your actions but you will realize someday...
tsk, so sad. really is. does this guy have kids? jesus.

 

People have some very strong opinions of marriage...

Personally, to me, marriage is just a piece of paper that makes your life harder, when you try to split up...

A piece of paper does not make nor break a relationship. If your relationship is in the toilet, a piece of paper isn't going to save it... Likewise, if you are in a wonderful relationship, that same piece of paper isn't going to make it better or put a magic barrier of protection around it.

Cheating is usually a symptom of a greater problem, not the problem itself. People have different reasons for cheating, and believe it or not, sex is not typically the reason.

Relationships need work and attention. So often, we marry and then stop trying to "keep" our partners. We let our figures go, we let our manners and attitudes deteriorate. We think "Well, I'm married now, so I can stop trying." And that is so not true. Then, we wonder why we hate, or lose respect for our partners and why we (or they) begin to cheat. We lose interest in our partners, often we ignore them, possibly even neglect or abuse them. And then we wonder why they seek happiness outside of our relationship? Yes, people have needs, emotional and physical needs. If you aren't meeting those needs for your partner, they may very well find someone else to do it. And really, who can blame them? Because of a piece of paper, they should live in misery for the rest of their lives? And how many times have you heard someone say "If I ever caught my spouse cheating, I will take them for everything I can." I've heard it said, plenty of times. There is a great deal of fear associated with divorce, especially when children are involved. Many breakups are ugly battles. Rarely are they clean and with the attitude that everyone deserves to be happy-even if it isn't with you.

I have been involved in more than one "adulterous" relationship and have been on all three sides of the cheating triangle. The reason that I would advise against being involved with a married person, is simply because the odds are against you having any meaningful future. You are often a transition person, there to help walk the person away from the bad relationship and into a better one, often without you. Or, the cheater will have pangs of guilt (society has strong views on marriage-as you can see from the responses in this thread) and will decide that they want to try to work things out with the current spouse or partner.

That said, I don't think that it is impossible to have happiness being a mistress. Nor do I think "once a cheater, always a cheater". It is just definitely not an ideal situation. But, if you are aware of the risks involved and are willing to take the chances, then it's all up to you and the person you are involved with.

But, don't count on NOT falling in love. We can't always control that one. And that brings a whole new set of problems, with it...

Good luck.

 

lighten up, people! married men are the funnest men
































...kidding. sorta.