I think I've got issues...no...actually...hold up...wait...I KNOW I've got issues! All I think about lately is sex! Ok, maybe that doesn't seem weird to you lot, but it is for me. I've always had a high drive, but sex isn't a priority in my life...I am a virgin, so maybe that's why, but lately - Argh! I'm so very frustrated ! I think about it all the time, and I mean all the time. I think I need a hormone-ectomy (surgical removal of all my hormones)...fast ! I am fed up - really fed up - of friends talking to me about their passionate nights - in detail, and the companionship, and the intimate moments, and the affection, and those special knowing sideways looks, and the fights, and the make-up times, just because I am their Kepper Of Dreams (someone you turn to, to tell all your inner most hopes and fears). I could scream, when they call, and add "So, isn't there anyone you're interested in right now?" Errr...yeaaah! But no-one is/has ever been, interested in me!...Just like I told you the last time! AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Maybe I am just an embittered girl, who cynically looks at blokes (without scowling though - I'm a friendly sort of lady!) and says 'they're all b****rds', because I've had the childhood family friend, cross the line, been groped as a child by a stranger, and amongst my peers, never even been given the opportunity to develop anything other than friendship, but now I'm a 31 year old fat(UK size 30) woman, who has only ever been kissed (quick peck on the lips to much laughter from the viewers), as part of a dare in secondary school, about who can kiss the fat kid, so, you know what - I think I'm entitled to wonder what the hell is going on, and be so utterly frustrated with it all.....it's just that, now as a 31 year old woman, I'm left wondering if the frustration will ever go away. It's all very well saying just go out and get laid - sure it's easy to do that, but I don't want that. I want the relationship, the laughter, the arguments, the annoyance that 'why doesn't he call enough' and 'what is he really thinking' and of course, please, Deities willing, the sex!...I want it all! I am proud of my virginity, never more so as when I escort a worried friend for the umpteenth time to the STD clinic for a check, but that doesn't mean I want to be a single virgin for ever! *looks angrily skywards at any passing Deitity, yelling 'Are you listening, Dammit!'* Ok, thanks for the ranting space....it may not help me really, but its a fragment of frustration, blown into the ethos....maybe somebody out there understands, a little about what I've said......anyone?
ah well, ya know its not that bad really, your time will come, just maybe because of the groping and mistreatment you maybe need to work on trust issues alittle? i dont think its really your weight thats so much the problem as much as its your attitude about your weight who would wanna kiss the fat chick? lotsa guys would...who would wanna kiss the fat chick who thinks shes fat and unatractive? maybe noone...see wht imean? changing your attitude about yourself..and about men in general..will go a long way towards not only making yourself more open to a relationship, but more attractive (attraction is more then just looks but attitude as well) also, you should start hangin out where theres a better group of guys, more open minded and accepting..and...put interests above sex...if your interested in a particular guy, hang out and just do things together that your both interested in..develop a shared passion for whatever ya have in common..and let an intimate relationship develop out of just enjoying doing things together..sooner or later you'll realize hey..maybe we'd enjoy sex togeyher too..and ten just let it happen there are alotta huys who specificaly like heavy girls..and alot who just arent close minded and see beyond weight tothe person within so wouldnt care either way but theres also the close minded (probly like the next guy to post below me whos only advice will be lose some weight) and just dont let the close minded get you down..85% of guys are assholes anyway and u only ned just that 1 special one he'll find ya someday....i think i maybe lost trck of my point there (literaly just woke up & havent had coffee yet) oh yea..just try going places where more openminded guys migh hang out..where ya will be doing things u enjoy..and just let your inner beauty shine..i think its pretty odvios your a sweeet carinf person./some guys arent so blind they wouldnt see that..thats where attraction really is..in the attraction to the whole woman..and at least for lesssuperficial shallow guys, personality is whats most important good luck
Awww...thanks soaringeagle. Nah, to be honest, I don't really care about my weight. The UK folks do though. For example, I went to the hospital with a broken collar bone after falling from a horse, they X-rayed me, and told me that I had to lose weight, oh and by the way, that pain means its broken. I was overweight yes, but at that point not as bad as I am now...and that was just a typical thing. In the UK there is only 1 high street store that caters for bigger people and their clothes are dire and expensive. And the thing is my size is a common one. And I often see ladies my size, with a guy on their arm, so I don't really even consider my size as an issue, because I know guys like it. I keep getting told "you're a nice, kind, caring girl, there's someone out there for you". Well, it seems like nobody wants a nice girl. The ironic thing is that some guys think no-one wants a nice guy either! I DO!!!! hahahahaa! "just try going places where more openminded guys migh hang out" *sigh* I think I need to immigrate. Guys in UK are known for their shallowness, and the UK is 'proud' to have the highest booze drinkers, drug takers, crime rate, anti-social behaviour, and general dis-satisfaction, statistics in Europe. I don't drink, smoke, take drugs, etc (don't mind who does, just isn't my thing - allergies), which are huge amongst my peers, so as another thing friends tell me, I get classed as 'boring' or 'the responsible one' and instantly I find myself sitting on the outside, joining in where and as best I can. I do love life, and nature and all those simple things, but that is, in my experience quite isolating. I started a local discussion, walk in the park group, because I thought there was a chance. 9 people joined. All lovely people, with similar tastes and interests, and they all paired up, and again I am now the Keeper of their dreams too. Oh and the 9th person, committed suicide....I mean....C'mon! How bad a vibe am I giving out here !?! Sorry - not very tasteful, but we got along famously, until he jumped ship, so to speak. His brother at the funeral told me he always talked of me and how 'nice' and supportive I was! Do I really have to become a bitch to be part of an 'us' or 'we'? One guy who I have a bit of a crush on, knows how I feel, says he is attracted to me, texts me, sometimes explicitly which is fun, and is an all over nice guy. He talks of me to his friend (who also is a friend of mine) a lot....great, you might think? Nope! He has a girlfriend, and I am NOT going there. As nasty as it sounds, with the three in his life, its a two horse race, and I'm still in the stable munching hay. He loves her too much. The only thing he kept telling me in the beginning was that "You're a really nice, lovely girl!" Ack! Don't wanna be nice anymore! ( Thanks for the reply though...I will try and bare it in mind....today, however, is going to be a tough one, as I am all over generally grumpy, and embittered, with all the world and it's occupants.
There are lots of wonderful guys out there with whom weight isnt an issue...Ive met some drop dead beautiful ladie that the minute they open their mouths they are ugly creatures.....looks arent all there is ...
I know, that's why my weight doesn't bother me. But if you take appearance, in the UK, it's hard to dress in an attractive way when there simply isn't a means of getting any nice clothes. But to me, weight and appearance doesn't really matter anyway. I dress in a smart casual way or in accordance to the event at hand. I know it's not a dress code thing or a weight thing with me. Must be an anti-relationship vibe I give off.
Its too bad your only into guys...because I have noticed that there are more females that are into whats inside than guys....ladies see whats on the inside faster.
If you like yourself physically then you dont have anything to worry about. Thats why people have face lifts, plastic surgery, go on diets etc... its because they dont like how they look, so how can you expect other people to if you dont even like yourself? I havnt read all the posts in this thread, but i noticed it was partly about appearences. So yea, if you do like how you look then you are ok. If you give off an anti relationship vibe, get rid of it lol. I dont really know how, ive never had that problem.
No, I think it's more the "best friend" vibe. I was there most of my life... everyone's big brother/best friend/easy-to-talk-to buddy. I was their sounding board... nice... safe... non-threatening. Honestly, it really sucked at times. But in the long run it worked out well. Oh, and I'll give you a hint... I'm not sure how things are with the UK versions, but over in the States, the Society for Creative Anachronism is a great place for ladies to meet gents. The medieval garb shows off a larger lady to great advantage, and the atmosphere is quite inviting to romantic encounters. You won't be having a lot of expectations on you because putting on the medieval clothes is much like putting on another person... very liberating.
That's it! - the Best Friend vibe...Ack! My goodness! That's it exactly! I've had 5 friends check in today, to off load their problems, and the last one has self inflicted problems with a boyfriend of hers. I told her my opinions on it, as usual, and told her how I'm feeling today. She said, she didn't understand why I'm still single, as I'm so nice...at which point I ranted in a most unreasonable way, that if someone else said I was nice, I will act in a way that was distinctly NOT nice. Shortly afterwards she sent me a picture. A perfectly styled 1950's lady, with hands on her hips, smiling happily, with the word B.I.T.C.H. in a vertical line, and next to each letter, more letters completed a word. It said Babe In Total Control of Herself. Under the picture, she had written "Be a B.I.T.C.H. then. Love you lots and forever." It made me giggle today anyway. Now, just gotta work out how to change the Best Friend Vibe...errrrrrr...ok...ahem... ...suggestions?......anybody ???
sounds like you should start dating! talk to your friends Im sure they know some single guys that would like to go out on a date! Maybe join some sort of classes that you are interested in that are co-ed so that you can meet men that are interested in the same activities as you.
