Newman!

Ok, so we all talk about the glory that is Seinfeld, here and there, throughout the threads.
So, why not have a whole thread about it?
Some might say this thread is a waste of space, but it's not like any of us are peeing in the parking deck of the mall.
If we stop to do that, the goldfish will die.
Plus, if someone doesn't like this thread, they can just call me ASSMAN for making it.
I am Art Vandelet (sp?).
Let the race begin...oh, and don't get a head start.

 

Are you master of your domain?

 

If your bleak, your bleak.

 

I would like to beg to differ on the peeing issue. I'd be very surprised if there is any sort of public place somebody can name that I have used for a restroom.

 

I am the master of my domain.
Also, I got hand...of course, I'm going to need it.

 

I just remembered...one of the funniest ones was when that woman had that piano recital and Jerry put the Pez despenser in Elaine's lap and she started laughing like hell.

 

I bet you have man-hands...

 

i'm the one who showed kramer the location of the lobsters he stole

and pickin_wildflowers, you're breathtaking

 

I don't steal breath... I just hand out death... I AM Death actually... That's what college taught me today...

 

Yes, man hands indeed....and a giant nose that Kramer says requires plastic surgery.
My boobs are real though, Elaine found that out when she fell on me in the sauna.

 

yes... thank you for the recap of the mediocre episodes

 

Don't Touch Jimmy!

 

Jimmy likes Elaine.
Jimmy wants to date Elaine.

 

Jimmy's DOWN!

Jimmy's gonna get you, Kramer!

 

Man, that episode with the clown dude stalking Elaine was fucked up.
If I was in some dude's apartment with him and saw photos of myself on his walls, I'd be scared as shit.

 

"Let me tell you something, funny boy... You know that little stamp? The one that says New York Public Library? Well, that may not mean anything to you, but that means a lot to me. One whole helluva lot. Sure, go ahead, laugh if you want to. I've seen your type before flashy, making the scene, flaunting convention. Yeah, I know what you're thinking... Why's this guy making such a big stink about old library books? Let me give you a hint, junior. Maybe we can live without libraries, people like you and me.... Maybe. Sure, we're too old to change the world. What about that kid, sitting down, opening a book right now in a branch of the local library and finding pictures of peepees and weewees in The Cat in the Hat and The Five Chinese Brothers. Doesn't he deserve better? Look, if you think this is about overdue fines and missing books, you'd better think again. This is about that kid's right to read a book without getting his mind warped. Or maybe that turns you on, Seinfeld... Maybe that's how you get your kicks... You and your goodtime buddies... I've got a flash for you, joy boy. Partytime is over."

 

God, I looooved that one.
I think that had to be the funniest thing anyone on Seinfeld ever said.

 

Can'tstandya! & The Atomic Wedgie!

Although, I really liked the episode with the bet. Or the chess game between Seinfeld's brain, & penis.

 

Another good one:

"Come on, people! This is a bris! We are performing a bris here, not a burlesque show! This is not a school play! This is not a baggy pants farce! This is a bris! An ancient, sacred ceremony symbolizing the covenant between God and Abraham, or something."

 

We have the Seinfeld television show over here too.
I think it is not funny at all. Same level as Friends and those other lame-ass 'comedy' shows. Comedy my ass, more like drama.