Okay, for those who don't know me, a brief history: I was a healthy weight until I started kindergarten and my grandparents started raising me. My granny didn't like me to play outside for fear I'd get hurt, and she liked me to eat ... so I got fat, and stayed chubby until high school. I got in shape then, and dropped from 165 (my first week of ninth grade) to 117 (the summer of my senior year). I lost five more pounds during my first semester of college -- yes, I was five-five and 112 pounds. I managed this through ridiculously strict eating habits and extensive working out. But I fell out of practice about six months ago, and got chubby again -- I'm back to 125. Recently I decided to lose ten pounds, and started being really careful with food again -- that is to say, trying to limit myself to only fruit and vegetables, or else very healthy, all-natural vegan food available through my college dining hall or at the grocery store. But I still feel really fat ... and I get really obsessive about it. For example, I was very very hungry today and ate some bread from the co-op with a half-tablespoon of peanut butter (Ingredients: Peanuts, Raisins, Organic Cinnamon, Honey, Salt) a few hours ago -- now I'm sitting here still feeling full and panicking that I might get fat again. I literally feel like I might be heavier than I was when I woke up. Some days, I feel like I have a little loose skin under my chin -- it tightens up when I don't eat, but it TERRIFIES me. I don't want to have a wattle! This kind of thinking is not normal ... is it? First off, I am not THAT fat -- the only place where I am obviously chubby is my upper legs. I have a little extra on my belly, but there's no rolls or anything; my upper arms could be thinner but they're not at all jiggly or floppy. Second, I don't eat unhealthy things -- I avoid oils and try to avoid sweeteners (though I'm not as strict about that as I used to be), don't touch anything artificial, only eat whole grain flour, would be a vegan except for the fact that I eat fish (and even that's only because my dining hall serves an excellent, healthy baked cod but not a lot of vegetable protein), and so on and so on. Third, I don't eat much when I do eat. A typical meal for me is about a cup's worth of grains or cereal OR a small baked fish fillet -- basically, between 150 and 250 calories. I eat maybe twice a day and then snack on bananas or less than 8 ounces of fruit juice (around 100 calories) four times a day. This is FAR less than what an average American eats, plus it's healthier stuff too. Fourth, I exercise in the gym (200 reps on five or six different weight machines, maybe 15 minutes on the elliptical, and 200 strokes on the rowing machine), in addition to walking almost everywhere I need to go. So can anyone give me some advice on feeling less like a nasty hog? What should I do when the heavy feeling sets in? And what about that loose skin under my chin?! Thanks a lot ... if I didn't have anyone to give me a reality check, I would be a nervous wreck
well what you do is you make yourself feel guilty after you eat and that is no good. what you should do is tell yourself hey im eating good im keeping my body busy and accept your body as is. it took me awhile to accept the changes i went through and still am going through i was pregnant i got big had a baby and lots of baby fat and stretch marks and i am still in the process of accepting my new body 18 months after i gave birth. so really thats all you need to do is accept your body embrace it and be happy with it. do some daily affirmations in the mirror that should help and keep on living the lifestyle you have. and the extra skin under chin what you should do is tilt your head back tighten you jaw for a few seconds about 5 or 6 times every day and hoepfully that helps.
