So there's a girl at the dance studio I work at that is incredibly...SPOILED... I often wonder how people...outside of the people that know her personally, might think of this... She's 11 years old...her mother packs her lunch for her, puts her shoes on for her and ties them, her mom gets up at 6 AM every day to cook her breakfast, her mom believes EVERYTHING she says (even complete fabrications...this girl is NEVER wrong ), and weirdest of all...she spent six days at another student's house and her mom bought her a shitload of groceries and said that these were JUST for her...and she wasn't allowed to share them with anyone. I mean, is it just me, or is this really weird? I don't know...my mom would never do those kinds of things when I was that age...I was pretty much on my own doing my thing at that point... What do you think?
i think that's too much. i was babysitting my little 2 yr old sis at that point and pretty much on my own too. i think i cooked ramen for myself too... i think it's why i'm jealous of spoiled college kids... although i'm getting kinda spoiled now too, it's kinda weird but oh so nice to have financial help.
For one, I was lucky to spend the night somewhere at 11, let alone a week. Not to mention my mom not only encouraged sharing, but wouldn't have bought groceries for me to eat at anothers house to begin with. By 11 my parents had split, my mom was working 12-14 hour shifts......... and if I had ever asked her to tie my shoes. . . . . . . well we wont get into that. Her mother is not a bad parent. She's fucking nuts.
That's really annoying. I know some overbearing parents, but this one takes the cake. Though I just discovered today that my family spoiled me as well, in ways in which I didn't want to be spoiled. I wanted to be independent. And I did make ramen at that age, and still I feel the disadvantages of being a spoiled child. That girl is gonna have a hard life ahead of her.
my mum was making my lunch and getting up at 6 to cook me breakfast when i was 11. i wish she'd do that now. i often skip breakfast for lack of time and i never bother to pack my own lunch. my mother is great as a mum, i wouldn't trade her. she didnt treat me like a princess or tell me i was always right. my parents brought me up well i think. i only hope when i have kids i can be as good a mum as she was to me.
I feel sorry for that girl in someway.. she doesn't learn how to take care of herself this way. How could she ever become an independent adult? Parents who think spoiling kids like that is a way of showing them some love, they just don't get it...
i know some kids that are ridiculously spoiled.... it's too bad, because it ruins them as adults.... they end up expecting things to just be handed to them, it's rather sad.
Sounds like only child and divorced parents spoiled kid stuff. She will grow up and be a player. Sad Fate.
Out of curiousity, is she an only child or does she have any siblings? Being an only child could explain the mother's behavior. Not that it makes it right, but if that is her only child, it would definitely make sense that she can't seem to accept that her child is more than capable of doing some of these things on her own. I was an only child for 9 years and I was spoiled rotten. I did, however, put my own shoes on.
Why does this bother you? How does it effect YOUR life? As for the only child thing. I was an only child (until my foster sister was taken in when we were teenagers) and I was NEVER spoiled. I got less than kids who had 12 kids in their family. The most common phrase uttered in my house was "No you can't have that. You don't need it (even if I did, like school things or new clothes) and we can't afford it." My parents could afford quite a bit, cigs and Valium for mom, expensive clothes and a Corvette for dad, new furniture whenever they wanted. At one point in my childhood more than THREE years when by when not a single photograph was taken of me. Yet, my mother was all "I love you." (she thought that was the KEY to parenting, not doing anyting, just saying this one thing.) And they wanted, supposedly, 8 children. Thank God, they didn't get any more. The idea that "only children" are spoiled is not rooted in any fact at all. Why does it bother you that this kid is spoiled? How does it effect you? Why do you care?
yeah, that is a bit much. When I was younger, my mom would make us breakfast occasionally before we went to school. But buying separate groceries? Ridiculous! Man, at 13 I was helping my uncle lay carpet during my summer's off from school. And I'm not talking like little kid jobs like go grab a tool for me kind of stuff. I was carrying five gallon buckets of carpet glue, using a trough to smooth it down so he could lay the new stuff down. Hard fucking work. If I'd have asked someone to tie my shoes for me they probably would have asked me what my problem was. Well this girl is going to have loads of her own when she grows up. Can't wait till the world is introduced to this one..
What fun is a shitload of groceries if you're not allowed to share? Haha. Wow, really...that girl's life is going to be pretty difficult as she ages if her mother does not let her live her own life and start teaching her how to take care of herself. 11's a fantastic age to start a kid helping out with dinner, helping make her own breakfast and lunch. And good lord, please tell me she at least knows how to tie her shoes! If not...there's a whole website dedicated to it. Haha. I'm sort of jealous on the whole breakfast thing...I don't recall ever having a homemade breakfast that didn't consist of Cheerios and toast as a kid at home, lol. As far as lunch goes, my dad made my lunch a lot when I was in 5th grade, because that year I was going through a rather bad spell of OCD and for awhile, and he was the only person who could do my lunch right. Not even I did it right...lol, I was sort of weird. But yeah, that was the year that it was at its absolute worst. Maybe this girl has an underlying problem that they just don't share? Then again, she could just be very very spoiled. The best advice I can give you in dealing with this girl is just learn by example and don't raise your own children that way. The worst part about watching rotten children is knowing you can't save them all and there are always going to be bad apples. And who knows? Maybe she'll get thrown down a garbage shoot while chasing a squirrel, or a goose that lays golden eggs!
She does have siblings...she has three little brothers, but I think being an only girl does play a part.
She is one of my students. The other students in her classes watch this and think that their moms aren't doing enough (we've had lengthy conversations about it), which results in disrespectfulness from the other students with their parents. Not only that, but she thinks that when we have these conversations (along with general conversations about changing attitudes and work ethics) with the entire class, that these rules and discussions do not pertain to her. She goes home and tells her mom that she's sick of always getting yelled at because "everyone else" can't follow directions. For the most part, this girl is the root of a lot of the problems. So, yes, it does affect my life...it affects my job...and it affects a whole classroom of students.
I think it matters a lot. I don't think being an 'only child' has much to do with it. But I was talking about this a few days ago, and it seems from what I've seen that boys are often given more opportunities to be independent, when girls are overprotected, lots of times. And maybe it's because most of the instances I'm talking about include girls, being the only girl in the family. But I think it matters for a few reasons. For someone who has to work with children, if you have one that is particularly spoiled beyond that of the others, it does affect you and how you work. Not only that, but from the standpoint of being a caring individual, when you see someone who's being brought up in a way that will more than likely hinder their development, why would it not bother you? I love my family and my parents, but I wish I had not been so sheltered. And I know there are tons that were/are sheltered beyond anything I could possibly imagine. I'm trying to figure out how to be an independent adult right now, and it is extremely difficult for me, and I look around at people my age, and feel extremely stupid, sometimes.
How she is treated at home is her family's business, but when it affects my job, and the other children at the studio...then it's my business.
there's a whole lotta judgement going on in this thread. maybe if you approach this girl from a place of love, you could teach everyone in your class a whole lot
