Manic, my mind reaches out in frenzy Is it just a silly name of Your other persona? The one you hide from the general population- Or are you a secret spy, Light jazz music penetrating from behind your false eyes? The dimly lit bar scene Me, on stage with a broken microphone Desperately trying to prove Undying adoration To a man I barely know Waiting years for the day I wished to be truely swept off My aching feet
I really like this line, very nice image and for what I take from your piece here, it's insightful as well. I'm feeling your work here, so keep em coming!
I agree with Fulman those two lines stood out the most for me. I re-read the first two stanzas and found them more interesting after the second read then the first, but the ending was still a little weak to me. Overall I liked.
