Standing on my keyboard clapping! Great Thread. No humans are not capable of fidelity. Name three happy couples who are into fidelity. For that matter name Three Happy Couples. Better off being single and the disadvantages of it far outweigh the shit involved in being in a couple. It's why it doesn't work for anyone anymore. People get into relationships for the wrong reasons. Most will compete or cooperate but will never collaborate with you. So it's always one party is dominate and the other is submissive. We all pick what role we will play too.
I don't see why fidelity seems so impossible to you guys and polls show that the majority of people cheat at least once but there are still a helluva lot of people (suppossedly 43%, though I would think a bit less) who have never cheated on a partner maybe it is impossible for some but it is possible for many others
Actually I believe that it is innate to want to seek other partners. However, if you plan on getting "married" or having children you are making the commitment that you stay faithful together. If you're single or just going out, the feelings are easier to act on. I think it may be the chase that is exciting for some men and women... but you may eventually tire of it too.
I can think of half a dozen couples for whom fidelity is fact. It's a cornerstone for any relationship as far as I'm concerned. And there are others out there for whom it is as true too. The hard part then is finding someone to be with who holds true to those beliefs . Give yourself another 10 years of the chasing and the emptiness of the chase. I suspect u'll see things differently .
I think we'll eventually find some genetics involved in this. I hit an age when I was dating someone who just wanted to date...It was like, oh you mean see each other, but fuck around, & fuck other people..I wasn't comfortable with that, so I broke it off. That was when I realized I'm only built for monogamy. I think different people are wired differently. I've noticed that couples can have "arrangements" open and whatnot.. Sometimes money comes into play. I knew a club owner who's wife happily turned a blind eye on his infidelity because she had a happy home life, kids, shopping, & he died before she did. I couldn't do it, but it isn't like he didn't know her stance on it either. They respected each other. Life's a trip.
Hahaha..I remember him calling her a tough bitch with a gleam of pride in his eye.. She inherited plenty. Their arrangement suited them both..He wanted a partner, not a sexual dependent, & she wanted a provider, not someone she had to cater to in the bedroom. He trusted her with his family, life, & business. She trusted him to take care of her, their family, & business. ____________________________ I doubt statistics are reliable in something like this. Inherently, you are asking about cheating, & lying..How could you possibly depend on statistics to be correct? http://www.womansavers.com/infidelity-statistics.asp
I disagree women are the best fucking liars EVER, that's why us guys will tell somoene straight up when we hate them, women always talk about people behind their back, they are liars instinctively also, men don't expect it as much, because most men think that women aren't as likely to cheat
yeah, I am going by on average also, you said that guys just don't care as muhc I would also say that is something that is more for you than the overall group even guys that don't care as much emotionally, will most likely care in a territorial sort of way, ya know?
i've thought about all the things you mentioned in the first post... i used to be certain i'd be single forever, just dating and having longterm relationships... but always really hoping that that wasn't going to be the case, that there is in fact a meaning to the universe and soulmates exist... i don't know if that's the case, i'm definitely still learning... there probably isn't a god and we just fall into situations that suit us best at the time, it's all chance who we com ein contact with and whether we get along with them or not... i'm pretty pessimistic at this point myself.
I was reading along... reading along... all those statistics. Not necc. agreeing or disagreeing but not being shocked UNTIL I got to THIS And I literally said out loud "WHAT!" "-75% of men and 65% of women admit to having sex with people they work with." I hope they mean HAVE worked with. I fail to see how 3 outta 4 men are fucking a coworker. =/
Wow, I thought I was cynical... I'm not big on lying. I don't need to. If I want to bed down someone else. I'll break it off. I fail to see how lying will actually make things easier, since more probably get caught than not...How is that helping you lose less? I would think it would up your losses...Since if you do get caught you're most likely in for a much bigger fight, that you weren't necessarily prepared for.
All things worth having are worth working for. You'll grow up someday, whether you like it or not, and you'll be forced to make a decision. You can either be lonely in your old age, or you can decide to settle down with one and only one person. It's not so hard to understand once you get past the raging hormones of adolescence. flings become more and more obviously meaningless bullshit in time, you will start seeing the foolishness of it all and glimpse the reality behind the illusion. Someday you will want someone to actually talk to, rather than a bedwarmer. Even you, Jester, will have to grow up eventually. Or not. I suppose there is that third option, you can be emotionally stuck in adolescence, I have known some men like that, but they are very lonely individuals, still hopping from bar to bar on weekends in search of something that isn't there, or married to their jobs or their motorcycles or whatever substitute for companionship they can find.
