As sure as can be I'm a bird as you see I'm a bird and I'll sing my sweet song I migrate to places In winter and chases My dreams and the bright yellow sun As sure as can be I'm a bird as you see I'm a bird and I'll fly to my love As always I'm careless I'm happy and hairless And eat worms with my friends above
The word 'hairless' seems a bit strange, you probably put it to rhyme with 'careless'. Other than that, it's a nice poem.
i didn't mind the hairless, but it made me think of a naked bird, lik a plucked chicken or something. I know feathers aren't hair, but that's the image I got. Anyways, I liked it either way, has good flow and rhythm, good rhymes too. your sig is pretty cool too
Thank you, as a beginning poet I do appreciate all critics, both negative and positive. May your days be filled with something green.
That was too much. How do you pull off going into every forum and having people take you seriously? My favorite was the "Do you like humor" thread in the Humor forum. You really are a strange bird.
Poetry, my friend, is something you have to take lighter than seriously. Look of it as a delicate butterfly. Even the ugliest of caterpillar will one day turn into a beautiful angel of the wind, directed by the softest of breeze and the darkest of storms. That is, unless it does not get eaten first by a hungry predator.
