Would anyone else be wierded out if their husband continually spent time alone with his brother's girlfriend? My brother-in-law's GF is always calling up my husband while me and her boyfriend are at work, wanting to hang out with my hubby. Today they went "swimming" in a creek in the woods and have been gone an awful long time. Meanwhile, my hubby and I had plans to do things tonight and my bro-in-law just called b/c she was supposed to do stuff with him. Is it just me or is this wierd? I would never call up my BIL to go for a walk with me, just b/c I didn't want to go alone. I'm a big girl... I can do things on my own.
I'm only 17, but this would bug me. It could be nothing to worry about, but it kinda sounds a little odd...very very odd.
my fiance and my sister have grown to become really good friends, actually, and it doesn't make me jealous because i know for a fact he isn't in love with my sis. they are just pals. if they wanted to hang out alone without me ALL the time, i might be a little bothered by it...i'd just talk with your husband and just be honest about how it makes you feel.
Honestly, yeah...that'd kinda piss me off. It's one thing if they're pals and they talk sometimes. But they're going off swimming in creeks and shit when they're supposed to be with their significant others? I don't know...I'd definitely confront him about this and see what's up. It could be nothing at all...they could just like each other's company...but still, c'mon. That's your husband...what the fuck is he doing with his brother's girlfriend all the time?
uh yeah, somethings up. whether anything has happened or not, she seems (from your post) to be initiating things and swimming alone in a creek is completely inappropriate for a girlfriend to do with her man's brother, much less a married man doing this with a brother's girlfriend. and when he is breaking or slacking (at the very least) on his commitments and plans with you, that is not cool no matter who he is hanging with. it's disrespectful to you and to both of your marriage. you can't change what she does, but you can certainly tell him you don't want him 'hanging' with her anymore, it is not appropriate, period. the best of luck to you!
:& I confronted my husband about this last night and it turned into a HUGE fight. It turns out they went somewhere known as "Naked Beach" where people run around naked. That made it even worse. He is furious at me for not trusting him and he went and told his brother and his GF that I was mad and they are all saying I'm just "being silly." SO I guess maybe I was, but now I'm mad at him for telling them. He says it was disrespectful of me and I'm so worn down by repeated assaults on my character all day that I don't know what's right or wrong at this moment. All of the sudden I'm the bad guy and I don't know what to do except sit down and shut up. Hubby says he values honesty in our relationship but when I'm honest with him about how I feel this is what I get. Perhaps I should just keep my feelings to myself from now on...
Are you fucking KIDDING me?! He went to a NAKED beach with her?! Darlin', you are not in the wrong here. I would feel so pissed off if my husband did this and then got mad at ME for being mad at him for it. He values honesty, and yet...did he bother to tell you it was a naked beach??? It's bad enough that they're going swimming together and dodging their significant others...but swimming NAKED together...? I'm sure you love your husband, but god, he sounds like an ass. Maybe he's not an ass about other things...but with this, he really should've respected you a lot more than he did. What kind of respect is that to go swimming naked with your brother's gf while your wife is at home wondering what's going on (and he had the NERVE to call YOU disrespectful?!) Man...I'm really sorry. I don't know what to tell you to do. But the above poster is kinda right. Usually when someone knows they're wrong and they've been caught, they tend to turn the tables and blame the person who should be the one who's pissed. I hope you work this out, sweetie...good luck.
They didn't actually get naked, he says. Other people were naked but not them. Sorry, should have clarified that. Still.... I don't like it. Now all three of them are mad at me so I'm starting to feel like maybe I was overreacting. My gut tells me otherwise, though.
PEOPLE WHO HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE, HIDE NOTHING! the fact that he is now telling you that he was at a naked beach is even more sketchy than the other stuff, plus he is getting awful defensive if nothing is going on. you know in your gut that something is not right with this situation. follow your gut, don't just let him beat you down until you are tired of discussing it. tell him if he values honesty in your relationship, then why does he attack you for being honest? also let him know that reguardless of who he is hanging out with he shouldn't be skipping plans with you to go to a nude beach or anywhere else. let him know that your problem is not only the inappropriateness of hanging with the girl but even excluding her from the situation you are hurt by the way he is disrespecting you and then putting you down for having feelings (and expressing them) about this. and then i would tell him (and his looser brother and gf) that if you/the whole thing is "silly" than they have no reason to continue on. it would be "silly" to disregard your feelings if nothing is going on anyway, then they can just stop. plus how would he feel if the shoe was on the other foot? would he be cool with you going to a naked beach with anyone? especially if he found this out after you had blown off plans with him. hmmm, we all know how that would most likely be recieved-not good. if they still all give you a hard time, just tell him you are his wife and he needs to respect and honor how you feel about this and if he doesn't want to, well let him go live with his very understanding brother. lol! good luck!
yeah sure they didn't get naked at the naked smimming place, everyone else was but them--yeah right! and even if they weren't that doesn't really matter at all, they still did what they did, naked or not. and they are all mad at you huh? people get very upset when they have a guilty conscience! if anything you under-reacted! i would look them all in the face and ask why so defensive if it was so innocent??? hmmm??? yeah people yell the loudest when they are lying for some reason. as i said before, listen to your gut!
If your hubby doesn't respect how you feel about it and is all mad about it.. I say give him a taste of his own medicine. Make him see feel how you feel and then maybe he'll better understand. I do agree with the others about his unreasonable anger about it... they're probably guilty of some shadiness. Do you have a male friend you really enjoy hanging out with? If so I think you should make him your new best friend and hang out with him all the time. Break plans with your man to chill with this dude and see how he likes it. I'm not saying fuck around with this guy or anything.. I'm just saying give back to your hubby what he's giving you.. negligence and lack of attention to his needs. Sometimes people need to experience something to fully understand it. And if all three of them are pissed at you for expressing your concerns over the matter than they have no respect for you and certainly don't deserve yours.
I just don't talk to him or anyone else about it anymore. He says I shouldn't keep him from doing what he wants to do... And I haven't spoke to my BIL or his GF yet. The thing that really gets me aggravated is that the next day she called my husband to ask him if I was mad at her (when they came home that evening I was visibly angry and didn't bother trying to hide it). No one ever came to me about it... it was all behind my back. Now I feel like a bitch, next to my very understanding BIL.
that's really awful that they are being disrespectful of your feelings i hope everything gets better.
