Fat Jokes

Okay I know you have heard em so lets hear what ya got!

here are some of mine:

You might be fat when the state rquires lights, flags, pilot cars and permits for you to move around.

You might be fat if when you sit on a stool to eat at the counter and when you leave the stool is gone.

You might be fat when you are lying down outside and a little kid sees the crack of your ass and asks his mommy if that is the grand canyon

You might be fat if you get slapped and it takes a few minutes for your flesh to stop wiggling

You might be fat if the street pot hole repair people request you stop walking around the streets

You might be fat is tou unlock the wheels of the buffet table and roll it over to your booth

You might be fat if while swimming in a public pool you notice you are the only one swimming and everyone is looking like its an aquarium.

You might be fat is while sunbathing a group of people try to drag you back to the water to set you free

You might be fat if you go to a water slide and you get friction burns

You might be fat if you goto a chinese buffet and the owner cries

You might be fat if you go into a resturant and the owner hurries and orders a new car while your being seated.

You might be ft when at Walmart trying to buy some clothes and are asked if you prefer to shop the lawn and garden section for a tarp

Okay what ya got....

 

This is very offensive to America

 

You know you're fat when you jump up and get stuck in the air!

 

Yes, it is embarassing that americans actually shop at walmart for clothes, or walmart at all for that matter

 

what is it with the news - always going on about uk following in the foosteps of america and becoming the 2nd fattest population in the world? is it the burgers? I made some tonight as it goes - also is uk's Asda anything like walmart - cos I know they own that too - but i don't live near one

sorry - don't know any jokes at all of any kind - short term memory

 

i hate being fat. im slim

 

Yo momma so fat that when she took a bath in a .5 a cm of water all the water over flowed

 

you might be fat if you start crying after reading this thread

 

Haha! Oh the Thought...

 

god damnit I have to go to walmart today to buy some cheap shoes for a dumb show that they only carry at walmart. i hate it there, it smells.

 

being fat is a joke in and of itself.

 

hell yeah, man. i think that fat people, unless they have some sort of thyriod problem or some disease that makes them fat, should all die and be fed to livestock so us skinny people can eat.

i have 1.2% body fat last time i checked. i set a TN record, too.