Funny 911 calls

Discussion in 'Humor' started by goodlaugh, May 5, 2006.

  1. goodlaugh

    goodlaugh Member

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    BELIEVE" it or not,
    these are REAL 911 Calls!


    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
    Caller:
    I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner.
    Dispatcher:
    Do you have an address?
    Caller:
    No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?


    Dispatcher:
    9-1-1 What is your emergency?
    Caller:
    Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich.
    Dispatcher:
    Excuse me?
    Caller:
    I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it.
    Dispatcher:
    Was anything else taken?
    Caller: No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it!


    Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
    Caller:
    I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
    Dispatcher:
    This is nine eleven.
    Caller:
    I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
    Dispatcher:
    Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
    Caller:
    Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.


    Dispatcher:
    9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
    Caller:
    My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart
    Dispatcher:
    Is this her first child?
    Caller:
    No, you idiot! This is her husband!

    And the winner is..........

    Dispatcher: 9-1-1
    Caller:
    Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn....I think I'm going to pass out.
    Dispatcher:
    Sir, where are you calling from?
    Caller:
    I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
    Dispatcher:
    Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
    Caller:
    No
    Dispatcher:
    What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
    Caller:
    Running from the Police
     
  2. Love Fest1969

    Love Fest1969 Classic Rocker

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    That was kinda funny.
     
  3. HikerHauk

    HikerHauk Banned

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    hahaha:)
     
  4. loopie

    loopie Member

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    haha, i like the ham n cheese :)
     
  5. x_WaX_x

    x_WaX_x Member

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    lol hehe gotta a giggle outta me
     
  6. Rev.L.Ation

    Rev.L.Ation Member

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