how do you know when your relationship needs to end?.. what experiences have you had where you suddenly knew that you needed to move on? i'm kind of stuck not knowing what to do at the moment and am looking for your opinions. i love my boyfriend but i dont know if im attracted to him anymore, and the thought of leaving him feels like i would be losing a best friend. i just dont know what to do- end it and lose my best friend or dont end it and know that things arnt right.
I understand the feeling of feeling like you are losing a friend. You ARE losing a relationship with someone. But realize, you are in reality, just letting him go. If you respect him and truly love him, then be honest with him. In the end you will be happier with yourself and you will not regret the time you wasted with someone you didn't have feelings for anymore. Breaking up is not easy, its painful (usually), emotional, and uncomfertable. You probably have many great memories together and those memories will never go away for either of you. You are young and there is no reason to stay tied to one person if you do not have those feelings anymore. Walk away before things get too dragged out.
wow this is like my same question too... thats good feedback. for soem reason though, it just doesnt feel that easy. :/
I agree with luvah. I also think that if you aren't attracted to him anymore...then you need to end it before you end up hurting him. It's important to be honest with the one you love, especially if you want the friendship to continue. You are young...the both of you are changing, it's almost inevitable that your feelings will change toward people, places, things, etc. Do yourself and him a favor and end it before things get any deeper.
I totally understand your problem. And...no. From my own current experience, it is not simply that easy. Try doing something like that when you're depressed and anxiety ridden, lacking family and friends and lacking independence. It becomes impossible and a lot more painful then the relationship.
i'm in exactly the same rut. i'm beginning to have these doubts and it's driving me insane! i don't want to hurt him but i can't help how i feel. the bigger problem is, i'm not sure if my feelings are valid, or maybe i'm just PMS-ing or stressed. i hate this feeling. who doesn't??
sometimes you don't know until far after it's over and then you realize how different you are and you just know. You have to follow your head though. Why are you not attracted to him?
I understand your feeling, i'm eeling it now, and i'm stuck becaus i'm not strong enough when i'm with him. He doenst let me grow (personally)
little doubts turn into really big problems if the relationship is allowed to continue, and those doubts are not addressed openly and honestly. sit down and talk to him. tell him how you feel. don't leave anything out because you are afraid it will hurt his feelings. and then listen, really really listen, to what he has to say. treat him with the respect he deserves and that you would want to get from him.
If there are thoughts of moving on... Move on (respectfully and compassionately). If you are really meant to be together do you truly believe the universe would keep you apart? Your heart is the only guide here... Follow it Good luck.
my response to all of this is the same as yours. I'm going through the same thing as the girl who started this thread, and the person who gave the first advice definetely has helped me out i think.
I am understanding , in sort of the same but diff situation we have been together for almost 3yrs living together almost 2, been having troubles off and on arguing not communicating well, trying to work things out but also don't know when to stop or go on working things out, love him wholeheartedly but don't know for sure if i should go on or not, the big question WHEN DO YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO? SORRY NOT AN ANSWER .... I'm so confused myself
I'd say follow Luvah's post. Sometimes a relationship is hard to let go of when there's more than just the boyfriend/girlfriend aspect, but if you look inside you and see that you really don't want to spend time in a loving way that's beyond friendship..be a good friend and don't lead this person on or make yourself worry and feel guilty. Good luck
