being wit someone alot than you!

okay i don't know why i am asking this,but it's been on my mind.I have been with this guy for almost two years...he's 36!He is real great,i mean i have always wanted to be with a older man.They are just a big turn on.Anyway a few weeks ago,he said he is in love with me...and saying he wished he could marry me and all that stuff.The big problem..is that he has a gurlfirend..only reason we ain't together is i'm unage.I live with them right?so i know they haven't had sex in awhile.She is always on 3rd shift and he is gone when she gets here.My question is...is he just playing with my mind to get some ass?..or is it really love? i feel real stupid for posting this,yall going to think i'm white trash ...but please give me some advice.I think i love him too but i have no clue what to do.....

 

How old are you?


You've been with this guy for 2yrs, even though he has a girlfriend?

 

wow so you live with him and his girlfriend?????
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if your 15 and about to turn 17 i think, you should still be at home, this guys is fucked up in the head, theres this guy in my town who is my friends dad(so he is like 40 somthing) and he knocked up a 17 year old, GROSS i kno...

 

He is 36, you say you are "uage". That sounds like you are under 18.

He is living with his girlfriend and with you. He hasn't been getting any lately. The girlfriend isn't home when the two of you are?

Is sex the only thing he wants? I doubt it, I bet he'd like cooking and light cleaning if he could add that to the deal.

 

Well, in my experience, "love" does not involve some guy cheating on someone else to be with me. "Once a cheater, always a cheater" tends to be correct about 90% of the time. He sounds like a creep, in my opinion (no offense), and you sound way too young and immature to be involved in anything serious anyway (again, no offence). I have seen it all, honey, and I know your best bet is to lose this guy and find someone who has respect for not only you, but women in general, which obviously this guy doesn't. This guy wants to have his cake and eat it too.

I think you should work on continuing to educate yourself (both scholastically *cough*poorgrammar*cough*, and in life's lessons) before you go off getting involved with a man twice your age.

Please don't think I am being too harsh...it is just that when you are "underage", you (people in general) tend to be naive and take whatever you can get. You can do MUCH better. Grow up first, experience life...THEN if you still dig older men, go for it. <shaking finger> You are way too young for this shit!

 

I'm turning 17 oct.3..and yea i live with them...thanks yall for replying!...I always get into all the bullshit!

 

so you were 15 when this started, thats way to young, this guys a pediphile, get out of it, im sure when your older you'll only regret you didnt get away from it sooner.

 

yeah this doesnt seem like a healthy relationship for anyone in the house......... how did you hook up with these people anyways.....

 

how is it that you are living with some 36 yr old guy and his girlfriend? he or his girlfriend are not a relative i hope..
he is playing with your emotions b/c you are young and susecptible, i am sure your heart is already in it after 2 years and being 15 when it started, but you need to get outta there and get in a normal environment before this guy screws you up for life!
i wish you the best of luck!

 

I think someone else said this on here, but if this guy loves you, then he wouldnt have a girlfriend would he? The gf would be you...

I know its easy for us to say, buttttt it doesnt sound like this would work out, even if he did ditch his girlfriend, coz he'll probably cheat on you anyway, OR you'll find out that you want to get out there and do stuff like a normal teenager, and you'll be 20 with 2 kids and a cheating asshole husband..

thats the way i see this relationship going anyway

Love Amanda

 

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yeh, to someone so much younger he may seem cool, but hes probably just an old looser, a young looser would be better, or even a young guy who isnt a cheating, pediphile, a guy who cares. You should be dating around, having some fun, maybe finding a steady boyfriend, but with people nearer your age, no mater what way this goes, if you dont leave him, you will regret it. Ive lived in wyoming, and new mexico, and spent some time in utah, ive seen lots of this, and it never goes well. Best case, you get married, he doesnt cheat, you have a family, You still wind up married to a 60 year old man when you are only 35 and you loose your teen years. Imagine what you could have instead, get your strength to leave from that. Having some fun, being a teenager, maybe meeting a nice young guy your own age, eventually marying a man whos in his mid 20's or so when your in your mid 20's. I know you want to have the things an adult has now, but if you wait you can get them without all the problems that come with this, and you can do it without throwing away your teen years on a looser.

 

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Oh wow, listen... this guy is 30 years older than you are! It may be hard to believe now, but this guy is a sick bastard. And to believe he started taking advantage of you at the age of 14. God, what a fucking sicko! You have to get out of there now. A 16 year old in the middle of a middle-aged couple's relationship is not healty for anyone. Just trust everyone here, if you don't leave there now, you will regret it in the future! There is no way in Hell that this man is in love with you... well, I guess he could be if he is mentally unstable.

Look, if you have had sexual relations with this guy, seriously go to the police now... that is sick, child rape. And for crying out loud, go live with a family member, preferably your parents! My God, does your family know that you're living with this bastard? Go tell a family member to take you to the police station... or at least have someone beat the living shit out of this guy.

God, I hate child molesters. I hope this creep gets sent to jail and pounded in the ass.

Sorry for the intense rant... :& but this is just too sick.

 

No, he is not just playing with your mind to get some ass. More likely, he is playing with your mind because he has serious issues (inability to function socially with people his own age or lack of self esteem that makes him need to manipulate those with less life experience). Either way, as has been mentioned several times, if he were worth your time, he would not have a girlfriend AND fool around with you, no matter what your ages.

Actually, he is 20 years older... Still, that is far too big of an age difference now -- what is going to happen when you want to go experience new things & he is going "been there done that, don't want to do it again, just stay home & cook my dinner"?

It seems like most of the people on this board assume that just because they are her parents, she should live with them. There are many many parents out there that, well, their children would be better off away from them. Yes, this is a fucked up situation. We don't know a damn thing about her family -- for all we know, this is her aunt's boyfriend that she's fooling around with.

You need to find a better place to live, whether with a relative or a friend (preferably a friend with good parents & living at home).

 

Oh yeah... he is 20 years older, not 30. Oops. :& But still, 20 years is a gigantic gap, and that still qualifies him as a sick pedophile.

Well, if you look back at my post, I said "go live with a family member, preferably your parents." She should live with her parents, or at least one of them, if they are loving, caring, and act within the limits of the law. No one can deny that it's best for a child to live with his/her parents if they are indeed good parents. However, in the case that her real parents suck, I mentioned that she should live with any family member. I think living with a family member who already loves her would be the best bet, however, a very good, responsible friend and his/her family would also be a good choice.

And I understand what you mean when you say that some children shouldn't live with their parents. My sister is a child psychologist, and she has told me all sorts of things that parents have done to their children. Some people just shouldn't raise children.

Please, leave that place, go live somewhere safe, and turn this guy in to the cops. Don't let him take advantage of another young girl...

 

i don't recall anyone saying she should be living with her parents, they just asked why she wasn't living with them.

of course there are many circumstances which would make it not best to live with your parents (unfortunately) but even so living with a predator pedophile is not even in the realm of being close to a healthy alternative!!

 

Technical point, he is attracted to a 16 year old female. He is not a "pedophile." A 16 year old has an adult body. Pedophilia is an attraction to children. Physiologicaly, she is not a child.

So, he isn't a pedophile, the word is "creep."

 

Well, the thing is, she may not be a child physiologically, but under law (Or at least Ohio law) she is a child. Since she is a minor, I think he would be charged with pedophilia, though I could be wrong.

But I agree with you that he is a "creep."