Don't know how old this might be but we got it today. Just thought I'd share. (^_^) BUSH'S RESUME George W. Bush The White House 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue Washington, DC USA PAST WORK EXPERIENCE I ran for Congress and lost. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas; the company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock. I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team, in a sweetheart deal and built a stadium using taxpayer money. With my father's help and name, I was elected Governor of Texas. ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR I changed pollution laws in favor of the power and oil companies and made TX the most polluted state in the US. And replaced Houston over L.A. as the most smog-ridden city in America. Cut taxes and bankrupted TX government to the tune of billions of dollars in borrowed money. I set the record for most executions by a Governor in US history. I became US President after losing the popular vote by over 500,000 votes with the help of major Enron money and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court. PRESIDENTIAL ACCOMPLISHMENTS I attacked and overtook two countries at the expense of countless lives. I spent the US surplus and bankrupted the US Treasury. I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in US history. I set an economic record for private bankruptcies in any 12-month period. I set the all time record for the biggest drop in history of the US stock market. I am the first president in US history to enter office with a criminal record. I set the record for most days on vacation in any one year. After taking the entire month of August off, I presided over the worst security failure in US history. I set the record for most campaign fundraising trips by a US president. I set the records for the least amount of press conferences of any president since the advent of television. I presided over the biggest energy crisis in US history and refused to intervene when oil industry corruption was revealed. I have cut healthcare benefits for war veterans. I set the all time record for the largest number of people worldwide to protest my policies in public venues (15 million) shattering the record for protest against anyone in world history. I have dissolved more international treaties than any president in US history. I have made my presidency the most secretive and unaccountable of any in US history. I presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud in any country in history. I am the first president to order a preemptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation, and besides that I did so against the will of the United Nations. I set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in the US. I am the first president to have the UN remove the US from the Human Rights Commission. I withdrew the US from the World Court. I refused to allow inspectors access to prisoners of war and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention. I am the all-time US and world record-holder for receiving the largest corporate campaign donations. My largest campaign contributor and one of my best friends, Ken Lay, former CEO of Enron, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in US history. My political party used the Enron Private jets and their corporate attorneys to assure my success with the Supreme Court during the 2000 election. I am the first president in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security. In the past 18 months since the World Trade Center attack, I have successfully prevented any public investigation into the biggest security failure in US history. In a little over two years, I have created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided since the Civil War. I entered office with the strongest economy in US history and have turned every single economic category downward, all in less than two years. RECORDS AND REFERENCES I have at least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine. And my Texas driving record has been erased and is unavailable. I was AWOL from the National Guard during the Vietnam War. I refuse to take a drug test or answer any questions about drug use. All records or minutes from meetings I, or my Vice-president, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable to the public. These are just a few of my accomplishments as President, for inquiries anymore information, my father can be reached at the Carlyle Group offices, where he and James Baker are helping to divide up the spoils of the US-Iraq War and planning for the next assault.
That's pretty good. I would like to see Bill Clintons resume. That would be pretty funny also. Hobbies; -Cigar Afficianado -Fucking fat chicks -Doing coke and smoking weed -Lying under oath to the American public -Getting blown in the Oval Office
This tripe has already made the internet rounds. Where the hell were you? I love it how they say, "I am the first president to have the UN remove the US from the Human Rights Commission." ...But it fails to note several important things: - The stage for that was set during the Clinton administration, and it happened when Bush had barely been in office very long at all. - Some of the countries that remained on the list while the U.S. was removed make the list laughable. Libya, Syria and Sudan were among those "esteemed" member nations. Yeah, they're better about human rights than the U.S. I mean what the FUCK?! Sudan is currently having pro-government militias hack people to death by the hundreds. Is that happening in the U.S.? Talk about lack of credibility for the UN Human Rights Commission to leave countries like that on the list while removing the U.S., which at least has a Bill of Rights that people can use to oppose government tyranny! How about Libya, home of Quadaffi! Haven for terrorists, just like Syria! This shit is well known. If that's what qualifies for a "Human Rights Commission," maybe it's better we are not on the list. (see below) - CHINA and CUBA were two of the countries that voted to reject the U.S. Gee, big fuckin' surprise. Again, what the fuck are CHINA and CUBA doing passing judgment on the state of human rights in the U.S?! - Oh, and did they mention that ALSO during Bush's tenure, the U.S. has since been RETURNED to the Human Rights Commission?! I guess all of these facts would not have served the overt purpose of the "resume," which is to denigrate Bush and make him look as bad as possible without fairly giving "the other side" which would probably knock off about 95% of the list (and with that much off, he'd be no worse than any other politician you could name). Can't go including any information that mitigates how bad you're trying desperately to make him look now can you? Facts get in the way when you're trying to further an agenda. Here, by the way, is a link to the CNN article that appeared when the story ran: http://www.cnn.com/2001/US/05/03/us.human/ Enjoy. Maybe open your eyes and mind while you read, instead of swallowing everything you encounter that reinforces your preconceived notions and your desire to loathe. Maybe not everything is as simple as the talking heads who feed you lies would make you believe. Blue skies, -Jeffrey
Do people like you and the original poster ever look for the other side's response before you go believing stuff that is obviously created to serve a one-sided political agenda? Or is it just too tempting and easy to hear one negative thing and just believe that must be all there is to the story? You strike me as the type of people who would read a news story about someone being arrested and charged with child rape, going to that guy's house and stoning him, despite the next day's story that the charges were dropped, the mayor and police chief apologized in writing, and the parents of the accuser were arrested for making a false report to the police, when it was discovered that the accused was out of the country at the time of the supposed attack. I mean, for christ's sake, people, learn to look with skepticism when you read shit like this, which obviously originates from hate-filled, politically biased people! YOU people would make all your conclusions and never bother to find out how things really turned out after the dust settled. Sort of like the UN Human Rights Commission farce that I described in the post above. You have a lot to learn if you think the full story is told after you've heard only one side. Blue skies, -Jeffrey
translation = jeffery is right, everyone else is wrong. Maybe you should do us all a favor and take your OWN advise instead of instantly taking the defensive position and making excuses for shit that shouldn't be happening. The bill of rights is a total sham now, a piece of paper with a few pretty words scattered across in order to give the illusion that we still have rights against "tyranny." Take protesting for example....sure, we have the "right" to protest, just so long as we do it the way the government tells us we can. Go beyond that and you'll end up with a face full of pepper spray, being beaten by our police forces, and end up in jail. No need to break windows or cause any other kind of trouble, all that is needed is a foot in the wrong place before they come down on you. I'm sure that is exactly how our forefathers thought it should be when they wrote the right for peaceful assembly. I love the way you try to make it appear that since china and cuba and sudan are shit holes, that means all U.S. shittiness is null and void. People who bring up other instances of abuse in order to make our own appear not quite so horrible are pathetic. That's like saying it's okay if you beat your kid because the neighbor beats his just a little bit more. It's not tolerated at a personal level, and it should not be tolerated from our gov't or it's sheep. It's hard to preach to people about being open-minded when in your very first sentence you refer to this as "tripe." Doesn't sound like you're one to be telling other people how to think.
