Obligations are a hazard to mental health.

I just thought of something: few people like jobs (in general) but let's say this applies to greatly cherished hobbies: If you really love to play video games, how fun would it be if you suddenly had to do it, as an externally imposed "duty" or "obligation" or "responsibility" by someone else?

I'm unsure how other people think in regards to this, but even with activities I greatly enjoy, the very moment a fun activity becomes an obligation or something I "have to do," is the moment when all value of it is suddenly diminished. Or rather, if I enjoy riding a bike, but then suddenly HAD to do it on a fixed schedule as demanded by someone else, I know for a fact that I would no longer enjoy it at all.

It's somewhat like how I readily volunteer to do many things that people like, want, need, appreciate, etc. but I would lose all desire to do so if I HAD to do it. I'll do it if I don't have to, and I won't do it if I have to.

 

Sounds like a fear of commitment if you ask me.

Seriously though, I understand what you mean.

 

Seems like a personal issue. I know a plethora of people who had a hobbie that they really enjoyed, made a career out of it, and continued to enjoy it even when it became their "job"

 

Interesting take. Commitment (to me) signals a loss of control over my own life. A form of servitude.

 

See, and that's why you have a difficult time with obligations. Makes sense. You don't like the thought of being tied down to anything, you don't like to feel the pressure of having to do something, you want to feel free and do things on your own terms.

I understand completely. I'm somewhat the same way myself in certain aspects.

 

You've hit the nail on the head, except that there's even more to it:

In addition, I also think that long-term commitments generally weaken one's perspective on the world. By being strapped down by the expecations of other people, it is difficult to go out and get a well-balanced view of reality, because one is too busy fulfilling these duties and expectations.

Commitment (in the context that I am using) is the antithesis of freedom, diversity, opportunities, versatility, and a whole host of other things that I value in life. Commitments are nothing but repetition and tedium.

 

Do not reproduce. You are not ready.

If you already have children, seek professional help quick.

 

Okay, but isn't everything in life eventually repetition and tedium? No matter what it is? Shouldn't it come down to your frame of mind, what you make of those situations, positive outlooks? Not focusing so much on the negative aspects?

Can you not find any comfort in stability of any type?

 

Perhaps "tedium and repetition" aren't the best way to convey this.

The thing with me is that I want control over my life moreso than I want "stability." Stability isn't discomforting to me; what scares me moreso than anything else is the prospect of living an entire of life having to do what people tell me to do every day; ie living a life to kiss up to people with no end in sight.

 

Well I can understand that.