ooohhh i hate my life...

naw im not willing to leave him over this.i just need him to spill his guts to me and for him to let me know everything he wants in life. i refuse to get divorced because i know i will never be happy again if thats what happened. i just need some help on getting him to open up or let me know his plans.

 

But what if he doesn't want kids? what if that is his final answer? Can you live with yourself and with him knowing that you won't get the kids you want so dearly?

 

Honestly, you should be talking to him - not strangers on a message board. I would never talk about something this personal on an open forum.

 

well I took everyones advice and talked to him when he got home from work tonight.he could tell as soon as he walked into the door something was wrong...i sat down with him and flat out asked him. he looked at me like i was insane. i told him that before we get married in 12 days that i need an answer on where he stands with the kid thing before we get married. he said he loves me too much to not give me children, and he wants the mother of his children to be me. funny thing was he said hes looking forward someday to being a grandpa more than a dad. i kinda laughed at him and told him that was a long ways off. but i think hes finally eeing what this whole thing is doing to me. he swore to me by my 23rd birthday if we havent started a family yet then we'll start trying. he told me about all of his fears of how when he was growing up they were homeless sometimes and sometimes they didnt have any food. i totally understand where he comes from with that, but i also pointed out that at ages 21 and 26 we are much more financially stable then his parents were when they were 30 and 33...so i think hes starting to breathe easier on the whole thing..and your guys' suggestions have helped tremedously....oh nd cassie the reason i post this stuff on a forum board is because i trust every single opinion that i get here.

 

I apologize if I offended you. What I meant was that instead of talking to us, first talk to him. I know my husband would be pretty upset if I talked about something like this online without talking to him first.
Sometimes the way things come accross online aren't how you percieve them KWIM? Like, if you had seen me say it to you you would know that I was not trying to be hurtful or mean or anything. I'm just a pretty straight-forward person. And sometimes things come out sounding wrong.
Anyways, I'm glad you were able to work things out with him. I wish you all the best

 

Yay! I'm glad you got this out in the open and got an answer. *hugs*

Good luck with your wedding

 

thank you ...we are down to 6 days...i am starting to get slightly nervous...biggest reason being i dont wanna be in front of 70 people as the center of attention...yipes....but me and my fiance are both overly stressed because im working graveyard right now and im trying to plan my wedding as well...man its been hard. and then ith this subject, my fiance is starting to see why i feel so stressed about eveyhting...hes starting to be more understanding which is very nice...it makes me very happy to see that he is willing to make me happy.